bullying by teachers of LD kids

My brother has had a very trying year with one of his teachers. She was just dumping work on him and not really bothering to find out why he was not completing anything in class or at home.

Finally, at the last IEP meeting his reading specialist repeatedely explained to the regular ed teachers about how difficult reading was for him. She just kept saying over and over “He doesn’t read like you and I read, it is very difficult and so laboring for him!” We also explained to her that in that particular class he would open the book and pretend that he was reading until class was over. We also told her that when we questioned him on what she said to him about not doing the work he said, “She never bothers to look.” She had explained to us that she teaches her class differently and tries to accomodate all types of learners. So I opened my binder of goodies and found papers that she had written on. In red ink, of course, she wrote things like “Take pride in your work, you could do so much better than this!” She really didn’t have a response to that. Turns out she hadn’t read the IEP and that she left all the different types of learners up to the aides in the class. It states right in the IEP that positve verbal and written feedback is too be used. She has since stopped doing that and has been very accomodation and helpful.

Sometimes if you appeal to the motherly/fatherly or compasionate side of a teacher they respond. Other times you have to be down right dirty. I know that people will not agree with me but unfortunately not all teachers are compassionate. Some just don’t want to be bothered with having to do things differently, while others will bend over backwords to help.

Not sure if any of that helps but just some suggestions.

K.

I had one teacher that was doing this to my child who happens to be very advanced. She said my daughter did not obtain enough info for her 3rd grade report and covered her paper with red ink for supposed gramatical errors. What she didn’t know was that my Ivy League English Major husband had gone to 6 different libraries looking for info on the very obscure topic, and had gone over the paper with a fine tooth comb to make sure the kid had everything gramatically correct. This kind of behavior is so distructive too all children. I was never successful in helping. All attempts to intervene were met with anger and hostility. It’s a little late in the school year, but my suggestion next time around is not to wait but be first in line to ask for your child to be moved to another teacher. The lines can build up pretty fast with this kind of teacher so get there fast. Try to find some other excuse for the move other than criticising the teacher just in case you are unsuccessful.

In 6th grade my son had a teacher who would call the LD kids “baby”, “rugrat”, “rodant”, and would have them beg on their hands and knees for papers if they forgot to put their name on it. In this class there was two Mchaels and my son always only put his 1st name on the paper-if she only received an assignment from 1 of them she gave the credit to the other kid-this happened for half the year until she got an aide-the aide pointed out that my son was the only one who still reversed letters and that the papers where his. At my sons IEP meeting she told us the boy needed “major counseling and to be medicated.” She also said he was very lazy and refused to do work. Her complaints lead to some more testing that determined he had a language disability and was only reading at a 3rd grade level and had fine motor issues. We and 4 other sets of parents submitted a formal complaint, the result was she had tenure and there was nothing we could do. They did monitor the class the rest of the year though causing her to “behave” herself. My son to this day still has terrible memories of this class.

My daughter, currently a junior, has visual-perceptual and graphomotor disabilities that were first diagnosed in third grade. Because of her academic strengths, teachers and administrators have consistently refused to acknowledge the presence of a LD, including the superintendent. That denial has led to a refusal to provide remediation, as well as numerous incidences of pejorative remarks and treatment different than peers. Typical responses have included, “Who do you think you are?, “You’re not as smart as you think you are!”, etc. Peers have consistently treated her in a manner that has been consistent with the manner in which teachers, coaches, and administrators have treated her—leading to much bullying throughout the years, including in h igh school. Of course, administrators also deny that she has been bullied by students or peers. I have followed all the protocols, gone through the proper channels, with no positive results.
The only approach which was effective was to have another teacher advocate for her, and of course, she is no longer in that role.
Individual teachers have been great, but few and far between. Outside advocates are often expensive, and put the school staff in even more defensive postures. Some teachers have responded well to education. Overall, it seems to be primarily a function of the individual personalities of those who are involved that determines whether or not an approach will be useful.
It is of note that we consistently receive positive messages from colleges, especially those that also have honor codes. Most have rarely seen a LD so poorly addressed. Unfortunately, her LD places her at a disadvantage in many ways, most notably, the need to focus the search on those colleges that can provide the accommodations she requires. Few will teach her to utilize other techniques.

There’s sadly too little to do about this. Sometimes a meeting with the teacher can be helpful although it is VERY important that you stay positive at that meeting. Make your comments to her veiled comments. “Tommy says that you seem often unhappy with him. Is that true?”And what is it Tommy needs to be doing differently to have your approval? I’m sure it’s challenging to incorporate Tommy’s needs into your busy day. If we read between the lines at times it seems you’ve raised your voice. What was happening at those moments?

Those kind of statements and questions can be helpful. Stay positive and meetings like that can leave a teacher reluctant to have one again. It can also leave a shadow of hesitation over the teacher and sometimes reduce the abuse.

Teachers have their personalities and deeply embedded teaching styles so it’s unrealistic to expect a complete turnaround. It’s a great shame that our society cannot yet do anything about this and that it leaves parents to deal with this on their own. It should be unacceptable that teachers abuse children emotionally in schools.

My son’s 4th grade teacher’s attitude has been an obstacle this year as well. She is a “gifted cluster teacher” who has an adult LD son herself. Her attitude is that her LD son is lazy (she told us this), he never learned to spell correctly, his hand writing is attrocious, he just will not try, etc. Three weeks into the school year (this year) she had a list of complaints for us about my son. When she finished, I asked if she had read his folder which contained the psychologist’s report from the full case study. Everything she complained about could be found on this report as a deficit or concern. She then said she had not read the folder or the IEP. She continues to use that mighty read pen which she may as well use to mark a big red “L” on his forehead. One boy in class (who passes out her graded papers) has even been hiding my son’s papers so that he is not embarassed by the sea of red check marks. When I told her of his concerns she became very defensive “well does he tell you about all of the praise I constantly give him?” It is very clear that she does not understand what learning disability means. One example: We have been told that my son’s deficits make it difficult for him to form a picture in his mind of what he is reading. She marks right on the paper, last week, “the directions say write down what picture you see in your mind when you read this!!!!!!!” (which of course was underlined in red SEVERAL times for emphasis) She will also mark EASY!!!! next to questions he gets wrong that she feels he should have gotten correct. It is just a consistent display of a lack of understanding his difficulties. Here is the hook, she is a veteran teacher, everyone just loves her to death, and complaints about her responses to my son have fallen on deaf ears. She is untouchable. But I am saving all of the papers to state my case for next year. This will not happen again next year. One thing I do not understand is the ups and downs. At parent/teacher conferences (for report cards) and for IEP meetings “he is doing wonderfully.” The following week, the calls start coming again about how irritated she is with him because of this and that and that read pen goes to town all over again! Bottom line: Gen ed. teachers are not prepared to handle the array of LD’s placed in their classrooms for the sake of inclusion.

I don’t know if this is the same in every state but in Massachusetts, you can file a complaint with the Program Quaility Assurance office at the Board of Ed.

If the school is not following the IEP and viloating the rights of students they can be held responsible.

I also know there is a legal way to hold teachers responsible but I am still searching for it. It turned up once on a law webiste, I thought it was Wrights law but I guess I was wrong because I can’t find it there.

At any rate, a teacher is resonsible for following an ed plan whether they want to our not. If it is a veteran teacher that every one loves, goes outside the building and find people who aren’t so emotionally attached to her.

K.

My son is 9, and in the fourth grade. My daughter is an above average student and was in her class last year. My daughter told me then that this teacher would hand the LD student his work and the answer sheet. Now, my sons experience with her has been much different. He is not one to cause trouble but has a hard time sitting still (he likes to lean back in the chair, stand and do his work at his desk, etc.), and I am supposing that she sees this a a behavior problem. She refuses to read him his classwork, just hands it to him and several times when she has come to collect his work has made the comment that since his work is not complete she supposes he wants to fail. She sends all work home that he does not complete and add homework to the mix and he feels such frusteration! This past year has been horriable on my sons self esteem. I spoke to my sons LD teacher and in private she told me that they all knew this teacher did a bad job with LD students … so why was he placed in her class? I have learned that I can request my son be put into another class and I will do this in the future!! Im sorry your son has had a bad year, and hope that he gets a wonderful teacher next year!!!

After almost all of seventh grade, my son and I decided to put our energies into learning at home. We’re done with negative, ignorant and so-called well meaning teachers and administrators. The last straw was when the principal of his middle school insisted on giving him her own time to try and increase his writing and processing speed by bringing him to her office during his “fun” classes - classes he didn’t have an aid standing over his shoulder, constantly interrupting his train of thought, urging him to work faster(he has a 504 stating modified written work and more time for all work). The classes he missed were music, physical education, art and home economics. After several weeks, my son was depressed, exhausted and didn’t want to continue school. I asked the principal to stop this practice and she said, “It’s my school and I’ll do what I see fit.” I contacted the area supervisor and she seemed to agree with me but said ultimately it was up to the principal. The following week, my son came home and stated the principal threatened him. She denied it but during the course of a later heated conversation between us, she basically said the same thing to me. I withdrew my son and contacted the Office of Civil Rights in Philedelphia. They couldn’t persue stating that my son would have to be in school, going through this terrible experience in order for them to investigate. Life is too short. My son is learning and actively participating in the real world now. We are finding the positives in this whole, long experience. As the principal confirmed to me, he either fits into the school program or tough luck. Before I left her and her assistant, I reminded them this was wrong and illegal. We’re walking in sunshine now.

I don’t understand why some of these people are teachers! It seems like to school sytstem is set up to protect teachers and administrators at all costs. Unless a teachers strikes a child, they can pretty much say anything they want to children no matter how cruel and ignorant.

I am sure there are some wonderful teachers out there but it seems that the bad ones out number the good ones. I am surprised that all LD children aren’t homeschool. I know that I can barely contain my anger when the school district and teachers try to speak poorly and nasty to me, how must the children feel!

Anyway, I think that homeschooling is the way to go. Why take chances with a public school.

K.

Summers off, summers off, summers off this reason was told to me by a friend a former assistant principal.

My son’s teachers favoriet is to write over top of his letters with red pen if they don’t meet her exact standards. She also consistantly marks his 4 wrong because he writes it just like it is typed here she says it looks like 9 so the math is wrong.

Now when she marks something good it is done with a light colored gell pen.

I think red pens are an absolute insult to any kid other kids can notice it on papers. Correcting constructively is good not in a way to hurt someone’s feelings.

It must be an epidemic but I have had to complain about 3 different ones this year. I have never had to go to the principal and complain until my son moved up to Elementary this year in 3. He was illegally removed from an EIP class because he broke his leg in 3 places and his class was not accessible. The reg. teacher had explosive temper tantrums and shook him in his wheel chair on one occassion, when he was using the crutches, she threw them across the room yelling and screaming, she had thrown everything out of a desk (of another student) into the trash can and demanded to the boy that she was going to make his mother pay for the books and for her not to bring him back to school because he didn’t learn anyway. Yes this happen to someones elses child but tramatized my son as well as the whole class. This was 1 teacher in a period of 2 months. After I was called a liar and my son was a liar by the principal, the teacher openly admitted to doing these things to me and the principal. Of course her version was a little softer and then I called 5 other parents to ask them what they knew. Open and shut, my son was removed. As far as that teacher goes I don’t think any of the other parents had any more related problems of that nature which is good. As for my son, he was placed back into his EIP class against their wishes and the teacher has harrased me as well as my son the rest of this year. I think if I knew for sure the other teacher could and would remain calm, I should have left him in her class. Same school, different teacher, my son was sent to another room because he would not get on task. That teacher taking for granted that he had behavior problems, immediately put him in the floor, refuse him a book or desk “You will probably tear up my books or write on my desk” ???He has never done such a thing. She continued by calling him “PEST” repeatedly and then got her class to call him a pest. She took a wooden pointer stick and waved in in his face, slamming it against the carpet and against the desk beside him and he was really afraid she was going to hit him. In shock when he told me this and not wanting to be called a liar again, I called some other parents of children in that class, (this is a small town) and ask them to ask their children what happen today while I stayed on the phone. Not only was I horrified and the other parents, but the children all felt shamed (the ones who did name calling) and they were also put into a position they did not ask to be in. I am glad my son comes home and tells me what happens during his day. A lot of kids don’t mention a word until you ask them directly. It is really scary to me who the people really are teaching the kids in schools nowadays. When I brought this to the principal’s attention, he immediatedly told me that he had never had a complaint on that particular teacher but he was saying he didnt believe me or my son and that he would make sure he was never sent to her room again and he would talk to her. I feel sorry for all the good teachers out there. I know there has to be some, somewhere. I hope “we” get one soon.

As a LD teacher I really sympathize with you. There have been a situation where I have literally had a confrontation with several teachers/teacher assistants because of the way they have treated or made comments about my students. I think the keyword that most parents of LD students should keep in mind is: “ADVOCATE”.

I feel that LD Teachers should take the role as an advocate for their students however, it really bothers me when you see EC teachers bullying EC students just as much as the regular education teacher.

The advice that I give my parents are: read and know your parent rights, keep documentations, make yourself available and present as much as possible so that you can advocate for your child. I have found that when teachers and administrators know that you are going to look out for your child’s interest they begin to do what legally needs to be done which is very unfortunate that it takes all of that from a parent for individuals to do a job that they should do regardless of a parent’s effort to look out for their child. One thing you must remember is that you have to speak up for your child because you may be your child’s only advocate.

Good Luck!!!!!!

You’re so right! You do have to be your child’s advocate, but you sure won’t make any friends within the school system. My son’s LD teacher’s wife works with me, she said the other day, that her husband said my son’s IEP meeting had to be his last one, because he needed lots of time to get it ready, because it has to be “perfect”. So I’m going to try to take that as a compliment instead of a round about way of saying, she’s a bitch.

Hard as it might be, actually seeing better possibilities and not assuming people think you are a bitch is easier on you and fairer to everybody and it makes it less likely that you will be a bitch.

I have always had the attitude that I would be there for my son or the school staff and support them to no end, BUT….they are still in control. Because I have bitched so much about getting my son help from them, he miraculouly went from way below grade level with reading, writing, and very poor listening abilities to became an A student with a behavior problem. How do I fix that? Sometimes I think I need to keep my mouth shut and let him “be thiers” while he is at school. It seems to work for some parents. It is just hard for me to do that. It is also hard for me to be supportive of certain staff members that I know have lied to my face and lied on my son’s records. What happens if the school staff and I are not in good communication? What could and would they do? Sometimes I think it is all my fault because I have pushed them to do things they did not really want to do. I know I am my only advocate for my son, but have I done the right things? What will happen when he is passed along to 4th grade with records that indicate he has done so well and then he can’t read and write? I believe he will be labeled again as a stubborn child, being disrespectful for not doing his work, when in truth, he can’t always.

I have been teaching LD for 14 years and as I read down these stories I find them so sad and apalling. All of you who have had problems getting the regular education teacher to uphold what is written on the IEP must seak out the administration and DEMAND that the IEP be followed to the letter. It is ultimately the responsibility of the administration to make sure this legal document is followed. I am not familiuar with all states but usually on the back page there is a signature for the “person responsible for implimation. IF your special education teacher was not bright enough to put “LD teacher” then you have a case against them personally if they have signed their name. You should save all proof that you have that indicates the IEP is not being followed. It is your legal right to ask for a due process hearing anytime if you think the IEP is not being followed. There are also time lines for this process. And please do not let them suspend or expell your child without a manifestation review hearing!
I have gone many times to regular teachers and told them they are a lawsuit waiting to happen and although sometimes I know it works for awhile, I too know they are clueless as to what to do even though I offer to help. The sad part is they are not only clueless but unwilling also. All it will take is one lawsuit for districts to wake up and realize these are legal documents! My only wish is that I had more parents like you all who are already advocates for your children. I have one “cheerleader” as I affectionately call the grandmother of two of my students. She has had custody of these boys since birth and because I taught one of them to read after he had been in the system for four years she thinks I walk on water. I don’t, but I don’t give up as his regular teachers did when he was facing his second year in second grade and still could not write his name (I was on maternity leave for a year)!
I encourage each and every one of you to continue your fight for the appropriate treatment of your special needs child but I would also encourage you to try and make a friend out of your child’s LD teacher. IF that teacher does not understand the law, then get a lawyer.
Suzanne

This is my first time at this website, and I am absolutely amazed at how many parents are going through what I have been dealing with my son and his teachers! I could have wrote any one of these posts. What saddens me is the sense of hopelessness about being able to do anything. I find it most upsetting that these so called teachers who preach compassion as a school motto are so cruel to the students who are unable to learn by their standards. My nine year old son is far above average intelligence, but due to his experiences in the public school system, his self esteem is so low he is a very difficult child. His teacher this year has basically wiped his hands of him and views him as lazy and irresponsible, and seems to feel my son enjoys the negative attention it brings him. He will not work with me or send me any communication about whether he is missing homework assignments, or do anything at all, really. He feels that if he wants to pass the grade, then he will take the responsibility to perform the tasks. I have been to the prinicipal, and the assistant principal, and even asked to have my son removed from his class, but they decided that is not an option. They want him medicated, which I’ve tried, but had negative results. I can’t believe in this day and age, with all the kids who are lashing back at the teachers and bullying kids, that they still choose to badger and harrass the kids who are different. These teachers need to wake up and smell the coffee. I think classrooms need to have monitors put in them like some of the daycares are doing now, so that any parent can log into the classroom at any time and see for themselves what is going on. There shouldn’t be anything going on that they would be afraid to be seen doing. Maybe that will be the wave of the future classrooms.

I too am a mom of two learning disabled sons. They both have auditory processing disorders, the elder has the complication of A.D.H.D..
I also have two other sons who are not L.D. they both excel in school. The experience of the special ed. system has been like a sci-fi. movie. I left one county in Calif. thinking it was a fluk situation. It is not. This problem is not only state wide it is nation wide. I remember when I asked that my 2nd grade son be tested for learning disabilitys, and what the test where, the school psycholigist told me they get the test out of a file cabinet in the office.This 2nd grader is now in the 10th grade. This year I pulled him out of school and put him in a reading clinic. According to the district testing he was reading at a 3rd grade level. According to the reading clinic, he was reading in the 1st-2nd grade level. He has been at the reading clinic for 5 months now, and he will finish testing out today. On his word attack test there has been 5 years progress. It looks like over all, there will be at least two and one half years progress made in 5 months. Why? He is not in a hostile enviroment where he is constantly being dealt with in a very negative way. The hostility and blame game does not stop with the teachers, or on-site administration. It has never ceased to amaze me, that the people put in a position of power to educate, and make sure the children are educated spend a fortune in resources, protecting
and manipulating the truth, (that they are doing the exact opposite )Parents only recourse, what the L.E.A. will listen to, is when you file law suites. This is very costly, money and time wise. The L.E.A.’s know this and in my opinion make the decisions they make based on this one factor. It breaks my heart.

I was a hard working student, one of the quiet once normally, and praised as a model student, by other teachers but I never seemed to be albe to please my english techer. Even though my level were 4-5 years advanced in all areas except math. Because of severe CAPD, dyslexia, and ADD I was in a high level private LD school(kids who were atleast at level, but public school still didn’t work). I was in eight grade, but took some high school level classes. That year I had special ed techer once who old me I would never write as well as another boy in who to her was the best writer after completely marking my essay on The Scarlet Letter all in red until it was unreadable. I was indisbelief, the nerve of her. I told her straight out she couldn’t limit what I could and couldn’t do and that she was out of her place as a teacher, putting a student down like that. She just glared at me and I didn’t recieve any displinary action. I had gone over that paper many times myself and with my english tutor too who found the few normal errors, nothing major. After making the corrections and scanning one last time I turned the paper in. She got away with her behavior, always did. She mostly on a few kids, why us I didn’t understand. We werern’t touble makers and did our work. She was one near retirement. Quoting my mother “She belongs in a boys military school, least of all being a special ed teacher.” I banged heads with her a few times thoughout the year, but not this bad. Usually I just took her critizism has long as my grade was ok, though I told my parents. My tutor talked to her and they came to a compormise about the paper.

You may ask why didn’t I transfer out of her class because she was the most advance english teacher there(only American Lit and British, small school), How many students take American Lit in eighth, usually its eleveth rade for this class. Anyway, ended the year with a B average, which isnt’ bad considering she disliked me so much.

Forgot to mention that was my last year at that school. I transfers to a small regualar private school. At my new school they had small classe which were under 10, daily tutorial if needed, and a student:teacher ratio of 4:1. That’s impressive and rare for a regular private school. Best of all no horible english teachers.

I am thinking about starting a suport group for people with A.D/H.D. and L.D. for teachers, parents, Dr’s. and any people with this in New Hampshire. If any one would just to join I have a place where we can meet and have some coffee and or food. It’s just off the high way. I have meetings their for other things and they treat us very well. E-mail me to let me know. This would be once or twice a month for the summer and we can see what happends after that.

I ear you lou and CLEAR!! My 9 yr old had a year from hell with his 3rd grade teacher. She called him names in front of the class, always singled him out, mde im feel like he was worthless!! She is a teacher that doesn’t belong with children, she belongs with PROZAC!! I tried speakig with her, is was a waste of time, I went to the principle, that was waste of time as well. Finally, I just told my son, not to disrespect her, but just ignore her. Don’t let her upset you. Needless to say, it really didn’t work. She hurt him so much that by the end of the year, he has not one bit of self esteem left. I want to still knock her on her butt!! Some teachers just have no business being teachers, they don’t understand that they are an example to these impressionabe little minds and that they could really do some heavy duty damage. I say take what ever action works, sue if you can. I spoke to many educators and lawyers, they say this is a definite case, but who has the time??

Hi Donna,

Sounds like your son had my experiences as well, unforunately mine occured 20 years ago. It seems things don’t change unless we stand up and make them. I would sue, no one has the right to call your son names and treat him poorly. I know this is also easy for me to say.

I had a teacher in Grade 4 throw my report in my face and call me stupid in front of my class. She also dumped out my desk in front of my class and made me pick it up because it was so disorganised. Your son can use this experience to make him stronger, if he chooses to.

I did use that experience and many others to make myself stronger. I went to College/University.I now work as a Rehabilitation Therapist in a Neurobehavioral Program and a childrens treatment center, have a wife and 2 great kids (son inherited LD from me) and have my second degree black belt in Karate. I used those experiences to drive myself to be strong and become stronger each time I am challenged. Trust me the challenges will laways be there and there will always be someone with a chip on their shoulder, either a person or a system, the only difference is now it’s a lot easier to knock the chip off.

This is also my first time out. I am distrubed by the amount of needless suffering our children endure in the name of education. However, our experiences have also been reaffirmed by your testimony. When my lovely twelve year old daughter was in the fifth grade, she told me she wanted to die, rather than continue attending her school. She had been at the school, reputedly one of the best in our university community, since first grade. It had taken me three years of writing letters and finally hiring an attorney to get testing and an IEP. Eventually, she was put in the special education and the gifted and talented programs. In the third grade, her teacher told me that she had read an article in Time or Newsweek and now understood what I was talking about. In fourth grade, her special education teacher asked her, why she took so long “like the months, instead of the hours, like other children.” At the IEP meeting in the fifth grade, the same special ed teacher’s assessment was that my daughter had an attitude problem. Fortunately, the classroom teacher interjected that my daughter was the hardest worker in his class and that he wished all the children were as cooperative as she was.” The district’s attorney accused me of setting them up for a lawsuit. He announced that they would not proceed with the IEP unless I divulged the whereabouts of my daughter’s father, although he had copies of the court orders which gave me full legal and physical custody since she was an infant. At the fifth grade final report card conference, the classroom teacher apologized, then told us that even though my daughter had completed all her assignments and had an IEP which stipulated extra time on exams, he had been told he had to fail her because she could not complete the required standardized test in the time alloted! My daughter cried and asked the teacher if she would have to go to the first grade and stay there until she was an old lady, because her spelling was at the first grade level. After many more experiences which mirror those described above, I bit the bullet and began a search for an appropriate private LD school. My attorney told me we could focus our resources on fighting, but it would take a terrible toll on my daughter, or I could take her far from this destructive place. We found a small school, which cost about two thirds of my take home pay, but my daughter was happy, able to do the work, learned to organize herself, and after two years is reading and writing at grade level. Fortunately, I only have one child, so we have been able to live on a very reduced budget. Over the years, I have spent my saving, modest inheritance, and have made job choices which allowed time for my daughter’s care. Essentially, we share a room with students in a college residence hall which I manage, drive an eleven year old car, go to second had shops, when we have the funds, and are one inch from the poor house. I am fifty, not in the best of health, and we have five more years of school before college. Yes, she plans to go to college. She is also quite a happy and creative young person and I suppose that is what counts. In the fall, she starts eight grade at a larger private LD school with engaged, caring, and experienced teachers. Fortunately, it only costs a little over half of my modest salary. My experience tells me to be resilient, enjoy the simple pleasures, organize, and do what you can to change this destructive system, so that other special children have a chance at life. Cheers, H

This is my first time viewing this incredible website on students with learning disabilities. I browsed through some of the messages on this thread and it is appalling. Aside from the inflammatory comments, it is sad that the relationship between a student with a learning disability and a general education teacher is flaky. However, I must say that inclusion is not for every student with a disability. Arguably, some would say that mainstreaming is not for every student with a disability either. A general education teacher cannot and should not generate most of his/her energy to a student with a learning disability. What would happen to his/her other students? It would be equally distasteful for a parent who has a child with no learning disability and complain to the general education teacher and say,”Just because you have a LD student, that does not give you the right to water down the content and instruction to the other students who work.” At this point, I cannot pinpoint a specific case where general education teachers have been sued by parent(s) who have children that are free of learning disabilities. Those parents are disgruntled because their child has been receiving watered down education and as a result, their child does not receive the proper background for the next grade or even post-secondary academia. Some parents who have LD-free children, advocate those who disrupt the learning environment should be placed to a different classroom or a different school. It is very tough for a general education teacher to find a perfect “balance.” However, if a student with a learning disability is willing to overcome the imperfection, it comes by effort. Students with a learning disability and are not willing to put forth the effort will not overcome his/her imperfection. Of course, this depends on the severity of the disability. In reiteration, inclusion and mainstreaming is not for every student regardless of the nebulous research that strongly advocates those two criterias for students with a learning disability.

On a positive note, this ldonline.org is a fascinating website and a tool to educate myself on learning disabilities.
M-

Helen, I saw your post. My understanding is that you hve a gifted/LD daughter? Did you ever consider the use of assistive technology in the public school system? My daughter uses a computer in the classroom and has software for spelling and organization in writing. She also “spells on a 1st grade level” but has much potential We have an IEP and have “grade on content, not spelling” on it. She uses a computer for all long writing assignments. Anyway, just a thought. I know that the only way we can afford the remediation is to have her in public school.

This message is to M. I can understand the concern that children without LD may not recieve the full attention of the teacher but I can assure you that typically this is not the case. I grew up with LD and have worked in the field of disabilities for over 10 years now.

I think the real difficulty here is an ineffcetive system of learning that focuses on primarily 2 modalities of instruction - auditory and visual. Individual learning styles and strengths are rarely recognised for LD and non-LD children and little, if no assistance is provided.

I do not think segregation is a good idea unless it is for intensive issues (I.e. severe behavioral challenges, parent/child requests for more focused assistance to meet educational needs). Countries in Europe such as Ireland have school systems such as this but always the preference is to integrate children with appropriate supports. One thing they do is specifically pin point learning styles for children, areas of deficit, provide teachers with good E.A. supports and invest money in training for teachers. Specialised assistive and learning software is also a definite focus therefore with adequate supports most of these children do very well. There are segregated schools but they are specifically for specialised learning approaches and intensive assistance.

When people are segregated only due to the fact that they are different the individuals view of themself changes as does societies view of them as a whole. Segregation happened in Canada and I have seen true horror stories from some of such places I still try not to think about.I know you are only talking about segregated classes but even a step towards that starts a slippery sloap towards old views and approaches.We have come a long way and it would be a shame to take such a large step backwards.

You made statements about watering down content in the classes. Once I specifically identified my areas of deficit and strength (had to do myself at age 20), I did very well in College and University. I went from a child who the school board was trying to send to a segregated school for children with developmental disabilities to a College student at the top of his graduating class, I assure you nothing was watered down for me.I work as a Rehabilitation Therapist in a hospital and a child care worker at a childrens treatment facility.

My “imperfections” are what defined me and probably all the fighting I had to do as well to get where I am. I am not imperfect, disabled or stupid, I am Brad. Nothing more, nothing less.It strikes me as very odd, when someone has a spinal cord injury we provide them with assistive devices, therapies to assist them in adjusting to their challenge (OT, PT, counselling,funding) without batting a eye lash. But when it is something we can’t see it loses its substance and unfortunately usually so does the person its associated to.

Don’t get me wrong I am not angry with your statements. I believe everyone has a right to their opinion and you did make some good points. I just think segregation and the notion of “watering down content” for LD children bring up some serious issues of ethics for the rights of children with LD and other disabilities and issues surrounding stereotyping individuals.

I am a special needs teacher in England. I teach pupils with emotional and behavioural difficulties. I have done this for 16 years. I am appalled at some of the stories I read about teachers abusing their pupils, especially when those pupils have such difficulties and low confidence and low self-esteem. I spend my life trying to support and help the pupils in my care. I question whether we are teaching them in the right way, whether we need to look at alternative ways of teaching, slow things down to give pupils time to access the information properly so it makes sense and tell my pupils every day that they have won a little battle. My pupils are the pupils no-one else wants. They struggle in their mainstream schools, cannot access information quickly enough and teachers do not understand things like auditory processing, visual stress, cognitive overload etc. Some of them do not want to know either! I find this appalling. I have been off sick with stress and anxiety and depression for almost a whole year because I cannot get through to people that my pupils NEED SOMETHING DIFFERENT!!!!!!! We are not all horrors. I care very much. Jan.

Janet,

I’m curious. My wife and I have been throwing around the idea of immigrating back to Ireland due to the dwindling services in school’s here in Canada. I work in special needs in Canada but I am unframiliar with other educational systmes in other countries.

Could you tell me how you rate the educational system in Ireland. I don’t know how much you are framiliar with it. I was wondering specifically about availablility for supports in classroom’s, general kowledge and education of teachers and educational assistants and availability for specialised supports (I.e. Occupational Therapy, Speech and Language Pathology, etc).

Thanks for any help,
Brad

Dear Ga Mom,

I saw your post from May and felt I had to respond. No matter how successful you son has become, you should never turn control of him over to someone else, especially someone who does not care or love him as unconditionally as you do. The fact that your son’s grades improved so dramatically came from hard, tramendous effort on HIS part. He was the one making the good grades, not the teachers. The fact that he developed behavioral problems says to me that perhaps he was overwhelmed and over stressed to do better. He surely must have felt pressured by the teachers and his parents to “try harder” and that can place so much stress on a young child that they act out. There is a blessing in that academically, he has improved. I would suggest taking him to your county child and adolesent counseling center. They can help him address his feelings and express them in positive ways. Please try to remember that home is the only place he can feel truly accepted and loved just as he is. I don’t think you should keep your mouth shut when it comes to the best interests of your child. It is the schools and the school systems that need reforming not the parents envolvment. Why are the concerned active parents always the ones who are made to feel like they are wrong? Why aren’t the schools directing guilt and shame at the parents who take no active role in their child’s educational experience? Why are the parents who are making efforts to help their children being treated like troublemakers? Again, you are within your right and as his parent, it is your responsibility to take whatever actions are necessary to serve the best interests of your child. Anyone who trys to presuade you otherwise, is not looking to the best interest of your child. You are is only and best advocate. Please don’t question that you should allow him to be left to the school’s mercy. Check out the comparison on scoring for Public School students verses Home schooled students. If parental involvment is such an awful thing, then why are the testing scores so dramatically higher for students who are educated by parents?? It sounds to me like they have you questioning your responsibility as a parent. Don’t let them try to convince you that they know better than you what is best for your child. How sad that they would try to do such, but don’t buy into it. There are some school personnel who really do care about our children, but no matter how much any of them care, no one knows or cares for your child as much as you.
God Bless and Best Wishes,
Debra

I’m so glad you have found a site like LD Online so you will have a chance to learn more about the impact of learning disabilities as well as what sorts of teaching activities can be incorporated into a lesson plan and the classroom that support the learning of both students with learning disabilities and those without. One of the most wonderful consequences is they often become better teachers for the “regular” students, too! It’s always quite a surprise to me to hear from people, including many teachers, who don’t have any idea of the resources and information easily available to them. There’s a lot more information out there - I hope you can keep an open mind!

I’m sure some of the comments you’ve read here do seem inflammatory - and most parents of a child with a learning disability would be able to share sadly similar stories with you - regardless of what state they live in or what sort of disability is being addressed. While consistent work to educate myself and my daughter about learning disabilities and advocacy strategies have been very helpful, every school year brings a new challenge with some undereducated, often very experienced teacher. The truth is good teaching has always required addressing a variety of learning styles - and many of these strategies are the same ones that will successfully support students with learning disabilities. In fact, they often work quite well with “LD-free” students - including those with behavior disorders, attention deficit disorders, gifted, or “regular”. It has not been unusual at all to have other students in my daughter’s classroom who were much more time-consuming for the teacher and disruptive to the learning experience of all - and these were most often “LD-free” students.

It is interesting that your view of how to overcome the “imperfection” of a learning disability appears to place all of the responsibility on the “effort” of the student. I believe this is the kind of thinking that supported extensive use of that osmosis strategy of teaching - if she just sat there with a book long enough, she would improve her reading skills. While I have worked very hard to educate and partner and advocate, all of that can’t make up for the failure of curriculums that graduate teachers who have only one idea of how to teach and then expect all students, whatever abilities or learning styles, to adapt to them. Or of schools who don’t encourage or require further learning. Or of teachers who don’t make the “effort” to learn additional ways to teach.

I’m very fortunate - my daughter is a very resilient young woman and, although often frustrated, is willing to continue to help educate teacher after teacher. Neither she nor I would be satisfied with a “watered down” education - and we put in many hours on the priority of education. One of our biggest problem is the gap between what curriculum paraprofessionals are equipped to support and the curriculum my daughter is involved in. At least that has been our opportunity for the school to invest in some terrific assistive technology - now to get training and support for this!

I’ve known for years there were teachers who didn’t want to make any additional or individual effort, as if my daughter didn’t deserve the attention offered to any other child in class. But until last year I really didn’t know there were “educational elitists” who simply don’t believe anyone who learns differently should even be in the same room - as if the information shouldn’t even be available to a student with a (horrors!) learning disability. I haven’t seen any amount of effort on the part of my daughter that has made the tiniest dent in that thinking. And we’ve come to accept that trying to change this thinking isn’t the priority - helping the teacher understand that strategies and accommodations listed in the IEP are actually expected and that we won’t take months to re-hash or explain why…but failure to provide these won’t be tolerated for any length of time. I guess I’m only grateful when the children of this “educational elitist” don’t have any learning problems themselves - I’m afraid they might be turned out of the family as unacceptable!

Please keep educating yourself - we all have a lot to learn.

I agree…a monitor in the classroom! Of course…some of us…might have to eat our words. I’ve been to my son’s classroom and seen how some of the children act. I have also heard those same children’s parents complain at PTA meetings about my son’s children. Monitors…great idea. Maybe that will shed a new light on some of this discussion on this board.

Oh by the way, I have never run into these same parents that like to gripe when I am volunteering in the classroom. I don’t see their name on the list to do anything for the classroom unless it’s to send in cupcakes.

what bothers me about this subject, these teachers and administration are the ones that are evaluating our children and labeling them adhd/ld
This is why i have preached and preached get second opinions, teachers would rather have kids on meds then to deal with them like teachers.
Teachers are by far of same quality as when we the parents had back many many many years ago, lol
there are too many easy outs for these teachers and medicating is one of them, another is treating children poorly and getting away with it.
It does take a big and loud mouth parent or parents to make a difference, its time to advocate for our children and stop the abuse and unnecessary labeling

I, too have had a teacher like that- but over twenty years ago- and still have nightmares about the woman! I was an open target- due to being LD, and having to spend half hour of my day, every day in the LD resource room, as well as being the only child in class who came from a single parent home- whose father just happened to be a drunkard..- so, it was common practice for the other kids to torment me, and she’d praise them..if I fought back, I was sent to sit in the office the rest of the day- UNTIL Dad started wondering why the hell I wasn’t on the school bus coming home…didn’t understand why I wasn’t getting my lessons and assignments- due to having to copy and write out thousands of sentences for “Disciplinary reasons”- and his having to buy extra paper and pencils all the time….Then get report cards and failure notices stating I was failing because I wasn’t completing assignments AT ALL! Hell, how could I? Then there was the matter that it was perfectly fine for other students in the school’s special ed programs to attempt to shut my arms in the damn doors of the school busses….again, I was in trouble for being “Violent”…Let’s just say that if it wasn’t for the grace of God, Aunt Lou hitting the roof and going off on that blonde bitch- I probably would’ve flunked 4th grade- and to this day, I still dispise and loathe Jane Brannen- and would likely tell her off if I saw her! (I haven’t forgotten, nor have I forgave her for the living hell she put me through….) I think every day of that school term, I begged Dad to send me back to Sims- where I was sent for 1st grade and was in an all day class room-
second and third grade save for LD was hell, too- try getting pinched till you bleed by a class mate, or being held down by black kids on the play ground and kicked in the kidneys till you screamed bloody murder- because you were LD…School didn’t improve- just got worse till I hit Jr. High…then the same old hell in High School….by then, they were convinced that I was a mental case- hell- if they’d treated me better, I might not have been such a B**** about it or to them….go figure! (In 5th grade Dad yanked me out of LD- because who eventually would be my stepmother didn’t want to be known to associate with an LD kid…- and she wasn’t going to make any efforts to accomodate that- and she never did…)
as for Dad- he just went along with all of it- the mentality was,”Oh well, you f***** up, and SHAMED ME- Nita, now YOU pay the piper!” LOL that’s me- the F**k up, source of shame, and general freakin’ failure according to my Dad….*rolls eyes* what an idiot!
Nita

Thought I’d bump this thread, as it’s been a long time since anyone has posted on it. It’s horrible that any teacher would mistreat a struggling student. :x :evil:

Kathy G.

:cry: I have to say I’m horrified at what I just read. Unfortunately, I have experienced alot of it. My daughter has had a great year in some ways. She no longer cries every morning, she is doing better academically, and has made a couple of friends. We had to have her base teacher changed, that took some doing. Her teacher would not give her her accomidations. Math and English are her two worst subjects. Her teacher, (same for both subjects)would not let her use her calculator, (in her IEP) because she kept telling her it was inappropriate, she should know her multiplication tables by now. My daughter may never be able to remember them. Isn’t that why God created calculators? She would tell her over and over that the material she was asking help for, was from last year and she ought to know it. She never gave my daughter any help.

As the teacher put it, “she was preparing her for the REAL WORLD. None of her other teachers have been very helpful, they don’t seem to understand that she the child has a disability. They just think her attitude could be better, she doesn’t try hard enough. If I hear that again I may scream.

Afer going to the guidance counselor 6 times, and being assured that things would change, and they did. They lied to us and told us that the calculator was allowed. Our child would tell us , NO the teacher won’t let me use it. Don’t they think we ever talk to our kids?

We went to the principal and he okayed the teacher change. We thought that this solve things. Guess Again! Someone on the “team” deceided that the parents were at fault. Yes, we keep telling our child that she can’t. One of her teachers told her that I called and told the teacher that she couldn’t do things. Smoke can right out of my ears. I haven’t yet talked to that person. Another teacher told her to “FORGET what your mother told you.” :evil:

We had to put her in a smaller math class so that she could get her grades up, she had lost so much time in the class she was in and it worked. She went from a 60 to a 90 average in 5 weeks. The good news didn’t last. Now that she is being successful, this teacher has deceided she can’t use her calculator.

The teachers cornered her father and I in a meeting we asked for to see what we could do to help her wih her science grades, and proceeded to tell us that our child is very capable, and that we should stop telling her she can’t. We have always told our child that she is very bright, and that she can do anything she wants to. (Academically of course)They insist that she should write in cursive even though she is cursive exempt on her IEP, and the OT eval says cursive is not practical for her. The OT teacher in school even says she wants to see more improvement. :x

Since that meeting, all of the people from that meeting have treated us differently. They are downright argumentative and condesending.

The good news at the end of the tunnel is that the school district has changed our middle school, and starting nex year, she will be in a different school. We can only hope and pray for a better year.

How old is your son? It can be helpful to schedule a meeting with the teacher. Smile throughout it and be warm and ask questions such as - Tommy shares some remarks with us that we’re sure he’s misunderstood…. try to keep an open mind but always keep on the lookout for what you can tell your son to get on this teacher’s good side - bullying teachers are often ones who aren’t deep thinkers. If your son will play along, the teacher can be played.

Teachers don’t want parents involved. Don’t ever look angry - even if you are - but your presence will serve as a deterrent. Sadly, bullying teachers usually just find another target.

If the bullying would continue, you can also schedule a meeting with the principal again always being nothing more than pleasantly concerned and asking - in your experience, is there a better way for our son to work with Miss Smith? They seem to have gotten off on the wrong foot?

Miss Smith will want you to go away and will think twice before bullying Tommy. she may ignore him for the rest of the year but that’s better than being bullied.

I had a tutor in the math center at school tell me that claculators are for the lazy and the weak-minded. He wouldn’t let me use it on a test that included compound interest and needless to say I flunked. I took the test again and just passed with a 71 (even with the calculator!). I don’t go to the math center when he’s there anymore.

I understand how everyone feels here. :( Since my LD’s didn’t get diagnosed until last year I had a hard time up to junior high ( when my mom decided to homeschool me). In third grade my teacher would call me “stupid” and “retard” because I couldn’t learn my times tables quickly. Then she gave me a hard time with my drawing and writing in which she would actually use obscenities to describe my writng skills. Then in the upper grades in elementary school the kids bullied me and the teachers wouldn’t do anything about it. Especially was worse was being in fifth grade and special ed ( brain injured, down’s syndrome, and audtistic but no LD) kids younger than me could remember their math and even play musical instruments. They even teased me. If I had teased these special ed kids back I would have been expelled so I was completely helpless to everone’s toture. Even as a college student now I struggle with my self esteem and has seen a psychologist many times throughout my time there. :cry:

:shock:

Wow. These are some dreadful stories. Moms, dads, your kids have been through a lot. You former kids have been through a lot. Well, this is the very reason I want to be a special ed teacher. Someone’s got to look out for these kids!

ttt -

when i was younger I went to a small town school. My 3rd grade teacher bullied me. during this time I was just starting to find out that I could possibly have an LD. During my screening test it was found out that I also needed glasses. Before I found out that i need glasses, my teacher would ask me to read the board or the over head. I would tell her that i couldn’t see it. She would come back to the back of the classroom were my desk was look up to the over head or black board and say “I can see that why can’t you?” I remember going home and not even getting half way down our long driveway before i started crying. This went on for most of that Year. I was one of the best behaved students in my class, but because of my mental problems I was treated as a problem child. My Mom was already working with an IEP team to find out what they could. what it ended up coming down to was that the school had to have a meeting with the parents of every student in my class because, this teacher and the teacher in the grade ahead got our class a year and a half behind of where we were suppose to be curriculem wise. One of the teachers is still teaching today. the other one retired not to long after having our class. this also started a lot of changes that happened in our school. the school went and changed the rules that they had for the classroom enviroment and also started to enforce them. These rules are still enforced today. Even with all that I went through this made it better for all the children that came after me. they hopefully will never have to go through the stress that I went through because of the lack of structure and disapline that was in that school.

I really think that you could do your child a world of good by getting the F.A.T. City Video available on this site. Any teacher, including bully teachers, will open their eyes with this powerful video. (most)

Get this video, and ask your principals to show it to the staff. This might make the biggest impact. I know it opened my eyes.

Or buy the video, watch it and donate it to the school. Beg your teacher to watch it.

M

I read these messages today and ran right out the library. We actually had the video. [size=18][b]It was great[/b][/size]. I learned alot and how to better help my son. It was a real eye opener. I am going to let my assisstant principle and school councilor know about this video. My sons teacher this year needed to see this at the beginning of the year. [color=green]All parents as well as teacher should see this video. :lol:[/color]

AnnV,

I’m glad you liked the video. Every parent who I’ve shown has been so grateful to have seen this video. This video is old but so relavent. The new video just came out this month called Beyond F.A.T. City. It is also very good. The follow up video should only be viewed after seeing the first video though.

AnnV, I think this video should be in every school in America. I even wrote to Oprah telling her to get Rick Lavoie on the show. I’d love to see her and some famous people go through the simulation. I doubt she’ll write me back because she gets tons of letters each day. Maybe someone should send her all these posts and she could have a show about it. A mom, whose kid has been hurt needs to write to her. I’m just a teacher and I doubt I could convince her to do a show.

I am doing an inservice on this FAT city simulation next year at my staff. This is such a great time with all the inclusion going on.

AnnV, maybe you could start another post and write what you wrote. It might get buried in here. I posted this up at the LD forum at the top. You might also consider adding a reply to the post there for people to see the parent point of view on this video. Every teacher and parent who sees this video changes. It opens eyes.

There are many videos on the market but this video is the VERY BEST I’ve ever seen. This is why it is a best selling educational video.

The best defense to help your child and others is education. This video has an amazing way to reach people and help them understand how it might feel to learn differently or be learning disabled.

This video very likely is in a library near you. Take time to watch it if you work with or have an LD kid in your life. Then, tell someone about it.

Right now, there is a special on how to buy this video at a discount. See the post up at the top on Leaning Disabilities, FAT city, to see how to get the discount.

One person can make a difference in the world.

Michelle

Michelle,

If you feel so inclined you may want to approach other media outlets as well as talk shows to do a show or a report on teacher bullying. I too was bullied by teachers but I doubt if it was ever to the same degree kids today are bullied.

Back in the days I attended school teachers were more qualified and professional.