I need some advice from someone who’s been there and done that. My 18 year old daughter has the “maturity” level of about a 13-14 year old. She just got fired from her second job yesterday. There are always two sides to the story so I believe part of what she said but not all of it. She is homeschooled and has been for the past 5 years. When I pulled her out of PS she should have been in the 10th grade, but was in 9th. She was learning at a 2-3 grade level (outside independant testing)(the school said she was doing just fine.) SHe has no desire to do anything except watch t.v. and eat. She hates school and doesn’t even try. She seemed to love her job. I know she did but she was a square peg trying to fit into a round peg world and didn’t fit in with the other kids at her job because she doesn’t smoke, drink or swear. I don’t know anyone around me who has gone through anything like this. I don’t have any other support really. Her father (ex-husband) is still in denial about her disabilities besides the fact that he is just a complete jerk and treats her like she’s nothing. SHe has no self esteem and I fear for her future. I feel like she doesn’t even want to try and it is breaking my heart and making me very angry at the same time. What can be done?
Re: Anyone here have older LD children? Over 18 years old?
One thing I thought of is lots of low level jobs require fast processing which can be very tough for people with LD. What kinds of things does she like? If she likes young children, maybe she could be an aide at a daycare center. I think the people there would be a different sort and being successful with children takes a different skill set than being successful with “I am too cool” peers. It also wouldn’t hurt if she is “immature”. Many younger teens are wonderful with kids.
Or if she likes older people, nursing homes might be another option. Part of my thinking is that she needs to get away from the “teen” job environment and find some success. Both children and seniors would provide her more positive feedback than customers at a store, for example.
Beth
Re: Anyone here have older LD children? Over 18 years old?
‘tis true. It’s worth doing a good search for a job at a reasonably healthy setting. You haven’t said what got her fired, so I can’t picture what the workplace would be like. Is she a kiddo who will tackle a job industriously if she knows what to do (which is totally complicated by the social situations at most entry level jobs), or are her social & work skills not up to that yet?
You could try to set up “jobs” at home that would simulate work (I also don’t know what kind of things she was doing at school that would support that transition to work) and figure out just what skills she can be developing during the ‘down time.’
Is she getting any counseling? This could be really helpful in dealing with and learning about social situations, building self-esteem, depression, etc. Many kids with LDs have trouble with depression, especially if they are feeling isolated.
Is she involved in any “fun” activities? You can often find classes through the community college or community centers that don’t cost a lot but would give her an opportunity to interact with others with similar interests.