I just wanted to post this little bit of nothing interesting because, so often i hear parents freaking out about their kid’s dyslexia or LD of what ever variety. I don’t feel disabled by my LD. Never have. But today, was a wonderfully special day because, today my LD worked *for* me, rather than against me. Which it actually does surprisingly often. Having LD is not as limiting as people believe. It is not a curse. It isn’t a disability at all. Infact, it may make some doors heavier to open but it makes other doors that much easier to open. My mind still functions just fine, it just functions in it’s own unique way. I wanted to tell this lil personal story as a response to those who have their freak out when their kids get labled. It is important too to tell it before it gets forgotten as such experiences and ways of viewing things are very ‘normal’ and even second nature to me.
So i am getting married in July, to the most wonderful man on earth. We are having the wedding on a lovely little farm in the white mountains in NH. It’s a very simple wedding. But we were thinking for a long time now about the ceremony because of the time of day and stuff we decided unity candles in their traditional usage were tacky. We considered doing a sand ceremony of some sort (pouring colored sands into a bottle taking turns till the bottle is full and corking it.) But i thought that that lacked personality and that it was all too generic. So for some time we have been pouting and sulking and thinking till smoke comes out our ears. He has the PHD but i had the ‘eureka!’ moment today. We decided, that rather than burning a ‘unity candle’ as burning down a symbol of unity in a marriage seems a poor symbol of union in our opinion, that we would instead *make* a unity candle. By pouring wax into a mould. Then we would drop in our engagement rings (Neither of which is disturbingly costly. Not our thing to waste money on massive useless rocks….) Such a dyslexic aproach to this issue is kind of…. normal for my life…. I find that i am the kid who couldn’t help taking the toaster apart, then putting it back together. It may have taken me an eternity to finish putting it together again, and it may have taken me more time to take it apart…. But i think it would give me a better understanding of it than say the kid who spent 5 seconds slamming it with a hammer to take it apart would get. For that reason sometimes my mind works slower in a sense…. But i know few people that walk away with the same grasp of things as i do. Sure the kid who whacked it with the hammer did the job took apart the toaster but he still has no idea how it all works. I find my dyslexic brain takes everything apart then takes time and puts it all back together again often leading to rather odd ways of thinking about things that actually result in a better toaster being built out of the materials available in the original toaster. If any of that makes any sense at all….
Having a different kind of mind is NOT always a curse. I don’t know another person who would have had such a unique and in the opinion of myself and my fiance, beautiful idea. We are not less able than anyone else and we are in some respects far more creative than most with our own way of thinking about things. Again, such ways of thinking about things is actually typical for my life. But i mention it because my fiance went wild when i mentioned this idea because it was in his opinion as a ‘normal’ minded person such an interesting way to think about it….. There ARE positives to being LD. Having a freak out about it is of no use…It won’t change anything, it won’t do anything positive…. LD makes some of us think a bit differently it doesn’t make us unable to think. It is like everything else. It has it’s upsides and it’s down sides.
Being LD, Is Not Always A Bad Thing!!!
It’s actually more than that…. When people freak out, because their kid has ADHD or Dyslexia…. Or whatever (almost anyways) I feel…. Actually insulted. I don’t think i am a bad person. I am not violent…. Except in cases where hitting someone will literally save a life…. Then i am all too happy to hit someone…. But if that is not the case then violence and myself stay very very far from eachother. But lately they have been trying to even expand the ummm diagnosis of ADHD for example, more and more violent offenders are getting the lable. Maybe they have it maybe they don’t. But there is a huge difference for example between someone like me and someone who is a violent offender. There is already enough fear as ADHD has been used to fear monger and create panick etc (Even though there is no evidence of any physical brain difference of any kind in shape size or functioning.) I am sick of this…. My mind works a bit differently. It is not broken. It is not less able. And i am not violent so please call violent ppl violent rather than ADHD. So yeh, when i see a parent having a freak out…. Because their kid has dyslexia or ADHD etc…It just rips me to bits as it is soooo insulting., Oh no!!! Your kid may have a mind like mine! NOT THAT! ANYTHING BUT THAT!!! I am apparently far worse a person than the current president of america or something… Maybe worse a human or so it seems from their freakouts than Nixon. I suppose being Dyslexic is the equivalent of being Hitler??? After all i can’t imagine being soooo freaked out if my kid had downs or clinical retardation. But maybe if i was giving birth to literally the antichrist i might then, react in such a way. So it actually hurts my feelings and is insulting.
Dank je schatje, for your congrats. Much apreciated. Hopefully the day will be fantastic. I had a facial today and hmmm tomorrow is busy as well. I am glad that what i have said has made sense to someone else. Because sometimes i wonder if i really am all alone….
Congrats on your wedding Mandi! Coming from a DJ who does weddings. The White Mountains are so pretty in July. The shear beauty of the place makes one forget all about having a silly ole’ learning disability. When it comes to Franconia Notch or Kinsman Notch, I guarantee you are not thinking about learning disabilities at that time.
You are not babling here. I understand everything you said. I took all my DJ equipment apart, My computers all of it just to put it back together again and oddly, Frankenstein would be proud of what I did with my sound mixers and computer networks. It blows normal minded people’s minds that I can just do that without even thinking twice about it. I still can’t fix a car, so with that I leave good enough alone.
I tend to look at it like this, if we were all normal minded people, the world would be a pretty bland place. We are the color that causes people to think of new ways to deal with commonality. If we were not there to spice up the place, I think it would be pretty boring. It’s not always a bad thing. Like you said, it can inspire creativity.
Freaking out over it, you’re very right doesn’t do much for anybody except get them mad and for what?
I’m right there with you when you say all of that.