LD, how do i explain?

Hi, Karen.

Welcome to this board.

I’m glad your boyfriend is trying to help but it is hard.

Rick Lavio (not spelled right) has a video called FAT City which explains what it is like to live with a learning disability. It is for teachers so its kinda pricey. Maybe you could post on the teaching board and someone who has seen it could tell you more.

Good luck,
ME

Information about the Rick Lavoie video FAT City can be found at
[url]http://www.ldonline.org/article.php?max=20&id=0&loc=66
[/url]
Most people who view this video often come away from it with a new understanding of and respect for people with learning disabilities.

Try looking for this video at your local library. I borrowed it from my library so I could discuss learning disabilities at my church. I am an LD certified teacher in the state of Illinois and I was dignosed with LDs when I was in Preschool.

Lots of people, when they first start teaching or tutoring, act like your boyfriend. This subject (whatever it is) seems so *easy* to them, you just do this and that and som and why aren’t you getting it?
These people have completely forgotten all the hard work they did to learn the material themselves. I happen to be good in math — but when I was in Grade 4 I had a heck of a time remembering my multiplication tables, because I tend to have numbers rev erse and slip around in my mind. This is just about the only time my mother ever helped me with my schoolwork, and I remember her sitting on the couch with me patting my hand in rhythm and reciting “five times eight is forty. Five times eight is forty … ” I bet if you talked to your boyfriend’s family they would remember all the trouble they had teaching him the multiplication tables or borrowing or whatever — but he has just let this slip out of his own memory.

I have developed a personal rule about this:
**ANYTHING is easy — once you already know how!!**
I happen to think downhill skiing is easy — just been doing it since I was twelve and five years of private lessons. And speaking French, yeah, that’s easy — classes since I was seven and three years teaching in schools where the kids knew no English …

Consider something you know how to do and he doesn’t — cooking or sewing or swimming or whatever. Tell him that first you are going to teach him your skill and then he can take his turn and teach you math. After he goes into a frenzy of frustration because he just can’t succeed at your skill, try to get him to turn that around and see that’s how you feel when he tries to tell you something’s “easy”.

DO NOT let him do your homework for you out of frustration. Yes, he means to help, but this is cheating. And as the old saying goes, the only person you are really cheating is *yourself*. Your teachers still get paid, whoever is doing the homework. But YOU will get a fake mark in Math 1 and then guaranteed you will flunk Math 2 because you don’t have the skills you were supposed to be learning. Hurrying/copying through Math 1 just to set yourself up for failure is simply not a profit. He means well but he is not really helping you.

If he is going to help you, get him to show you the skill on paper. Then only after he is gone do you turn on the computer and re-do the work all by yourself. Yes, this is slower. It is called work and learning. Work and learning aren’t always easy. But you get something out of it.

People who don’t have disabilities really don’t understand how hard it is for people who have disabilities. We really just don’t get it. I finally understood this over a period of years as I tried to help my son do his homework (with disabilities similar to yours) that the school work I had always found to be easy, was very difficult for him. I knew that he had disabilities, but it took quite some time for me to truly understand how this translated into a tremendous amount of effort on his part to learn information. I became frustrated with him because I believed that he wasn’t trying hard enough. He became frustrated with me because my efforts to help him were not productive. This increased his challenge two-fold — dealing with challenging information and

I agree with the person who advised you not to allow your boyfriend to do your homework. This absolutely will not allow you to develop the foundation skills you need to progress. And please don’t be frustrated with your boyfriend — he’s only trying to help in the best way that he knows how. It sounds to me as though he doesn’t really understand LD’s. However, he obviously cares about you, and he’ll learn to understand what LD means.

Congratulations on your commitment to school. You’ll do great!

For several years, I did not do my taxes, because I had to use
pencil and paper, and then pen and paper. It was too much for me.
Then, one year I did my taxes at my Dad’s, with him, using his
computer and tax-software. The keyboard and mouse removed the
excuse and obstacle of pencil and paper / pen and paper, to get my
Taxes done. But, I did get a nice refund on it; and it showed I was
interested in being a good citizen and getting the money I deserve.

J.G.T.

Karen,

Win if you can. Lose if you must but always cheat.

Karen the world is cheating you so you decide whether or not you want to take some short cuts.

Honor? Honor and a dollar will get you a crappy cup of coffee.

90% of the crap you will be forced to learn will have nothing to do with special ed. You are probably more qualified now than most of the brain dead morons teaching special ed kids.

Cheat Cheat Cheat. Do whatever it takes.

There was this dork in Herkimer NY cental school system named Dr. Neil McCreary. He was the superintendant of schools. His degree was phonier than a 3 dollar bill but he made the big bucks and he still is.

The rules do not apply to you.