Help--- Worst day ever!!

What kind of counseling is being provided? This is a very angry child and he should be receiving some kind of therapy, probably on at least a weekly basis. I would not rely on the school psychologist for this.

“he had to let other people know as well. ”

Is this because it could be construed as a threat to the school? From a 6 y.o.? >:( I guess he’s just going his job.

I agree with Guest’s suggestions. Your son should see a pediatric psychiatrist. Maybe he has ad/hd, but that thought should be put on the back burner for now. Maybe you could look into mood disorders. If your son has some sort of organic mood disorder, the adderall could simply make it worse.

Big hugs to you, mom.

He is being counseled every two weeks, but I’m sure when we go tomorrow she might suggest once a week. Yes he did have to notify other people because he was doing his job. My husband is furious, but as I stated before he is in denial. He thinks he is a typical 6 year old. I’m really not even sure if adhd may be his problem, but the anger issue has taken over his life. I am constantly behind him watching him and being right there when the anger kicks in. I can’t be there for him during school. I will just have to wait and see what tomorrow brings with the therapist. I don’t know about the meds , maybe we should increase them. He is taking 10 ml in the morning. Some have said this is a low dose. I just want him to be the happy child he used to be. This has been going on since school started, and his teachers contacted me after 4 weeks of school. We have done the audio processing which was normal now the school is going to do the visual processing test.

Mellisa, please post to let us know how tomorrow’s visit goes and how the visual test goes. I’ll be thinking of you.

What is it with dads?? :D

Well, I hear this kind of comment quite frequently; in the majority of cases it really isn’t serious, but of course with other things going on it is the school’s job to take it seriously and they are right to call you. Just think how angry you would be if later on there is a problem and you found that they hadn’t called!

I had an incident with a young adult student on Remembrance Day where they were supposed to read some emotional stuff about the world wars and the loss of the young men, like him, and he started pretending to shoot a machine gun and said it would be cool. I told him off and he did finally get my point and apologized, but it took a while and a major fight. It really is common and you do have to teach social behaviour!

Encourage your son to blow off steam around his dad, and to keep it cool at school. Tell him teachers are very sensitive people.

Back to the original issue, I see this a lot — he was asked to find a rhyme (concentrate on word form and sound) and he answered concerning the meaning of the word instead. A big flag that he really really needs extra help in phonemic awareness activities and basisc phonics and reading skills etc. Once he gets this help, he will be less frustrated with this whole school thing and then say less about blowing it up.

I came in late on this so I’m not really sure about how this change in attitude occurred. Did he seem to change overnight or slowly?

I don’t want to be an alarmist or take you down the wrong road, but having worked with emotionally difficult children, I sense something else. You mentioned he “used to be” happy. Could something have ocurred that you and your husband are unaware of? Something at school? Is he scared of someone and unable to talk about it? Did someone hurt him - emotionally, physically, mentally?

OR…..

Our friend’s son, who has severe ADHD and ODD, went through a change around that age. He is a really sweet child most of the time but there are moments, especially at school, where he becomes verbally violent and physically aggressive. He’s not mean hearted or evil in any way. He just can’t handle his emotions well and he doesn’t seem to understand the implication of his actions. I think he likes to shock the teachers and students. He’s small for his age and gets picked on a lot, so I know he carries that inside him.

Also, his parents’ “parenting skills” are very inconsistent. I’m not a great parent either, but I can see how the Dad really brings his son’s self-esteem down without meaning to. These parents LOVE this child and have so much anguish over his future - they are trying so hard. But, they are either overly harsh or overly lenient. It’s uncomfortable to watch because I can understand how the child must feel inside. So confused and angry because he feels like he does everything wrong. The teachers don’t understand him, the children don’t and his parents don’t. How would that make you feel? Alone and unloved = angry.

Is there a school for ADHD kids in your area? These schools know how to deal with the emotional impact of children with these type of disorders. Being a severe ADHD child can lead to emotional problems. These kids know that people think they are “different”. They hear the comments and see the expressions on other people’s faces. It hurts them and they may react in ways we don’t understand.

I know I provided too much info, but I’ve watched this same scenario for the last 6 years (with my friends’ son) and it can improve with help and counseling. The parents just have to take a hard and uncomfortable look at what may be behind all of it.

Good luck, our prayers are with your family.

I hope I don’t bore you to much or go into to much detail, but My son was a happy infant, toddler, he has two older brothers 8 and 11. He was always my baby!! Then at 3 his sister came along and I swear the day he came to the hospital he never looked at me, he just walked right by my bed. It’s like his life fell apart when his sister came along. I take alot of the blame because 4 kids is alot and it’s very hard to give each one individual time. He was always such a loving emotional caring child, but over time he grew to resent his sister. He never lashed out at her, but normal things like taking his toys- turning off the t.v. would make him irate and he would say things like can’t we take this dumb baby back or why did we have to get her. Now we are at the point where he fights with his brothers as well but they do tease him and I am trying to get control of that. I have decided that we will have a point system and every time one of them teases they lose a point. and at the end of the week who ever has the most points gets to choose what ever they would like to do either with or with out their siblings or with a friend its their choice. He definitely does not care for school at all - his teachers are wonderful and want to help him badly. He is doing wonderful with his math which is a positive sign. His report card came home yesterday. The part that boggles me is the fact that he can write his letters of the alphabet by sight but he cannot tell me what one letter is by looking at it . he guesses most of the time but then he gets upset and says he is just an idiot. His family life is normal (somewhat) I guess we are just like any other family in this day and age we are active in sports the two oldest play and my husband coaches. But my youngest son is not interested at all . for instance today was a tournament so we were at the rec and high school from 8:00 a.m. until 3:30. taking a break for lunch and I ‘ll tell you it is the worst thing for him to go through. Usually my husband and I split it up so he only has 1 game to go to on saturdays. But today my husband had to work so their was no choice for me I want to support all of my children. My husband thinks I am over reacting and that he is fine. I said he should not feel this unhappy at 6. He is seeing a therapist every 2 to 3 weeks and he will see the physcologist on march 10th. which I thought was to long of a gap without checking on him with hi meds. When he started on the meds the phys. said I could talk with the therapist about his meds which I did but nothing was done on thursday to make a change. She did tell me their was a pill that would help with his anger and he could take it with adderall, but she did not offer it to me at that time. I can’t remember what it was It started with a T. any clue? My son has never be abused in any way we love all of them and we make it a point to be very involved with everything they do. Also I am a stay-at-home mom. I wish I had the answer for him. If only I really knew what he was thinking. I’m realyy not educated at all with adhd but I’m working on it everyday and this web site has giving me the chance to express myself since I can’t with my husband.[/url][/list]

Probably Tenex. It’s a blod pressure medication that is generally a “downer”, causing relaxation, sometimes sleepiness, lower heart rate and of couse lower blood pressure.

One thing to consider is that stimulants can increase aggressiveness, and can exacerbate anxiety and/or depression.

It sounds like he is pretty unhappy with school. I agree that this is not normal or healthy. None of us like having to go to a place we dislike every day, but for some reason, we seem to think that kids hating school is “normal” and that it’s not a big deal. If our kids hated a daycare and begged us not to take them, we’d find a new daycare pretty quick. Why should school be different? Maybe it would be worth looking into alternative classrooms or schools within your district, or even homeschooling. Also, it would give you some time to be with him if lack of attention from you is a problem. Now that I think of it, going to school may feel like you are abandoning him. I remember feeling that way myself - I couldn’t understand how my Mom could leave me with these people that I didn’t know. I was terrified of school, and only went because I was too scared of adults to resist. I hated almost every minute of it, and graduating from high school for me felt like being freed from a prison camp. Education shouldn’t be like that. If he already hates it, the time to act is now - don’t wait until he gets totally turned off to education.

Hope that helps!

Probably Tenex. It’s a blod pressure medication that is generally a “downer”, causing relaxation, sometimes sleepiness, lower heart rate and of couse lower blood pressure.

One thing to consider is that stimulants can increase aggressiveness, and can exacerbate anxiety and/or depression.

It sounds like he is pretty unhappy with school. I agree that this is not normal or healthy. None of us like having to go to a place we dislike every day, but for some reason, we seem to think that kids hating school is “normal” and that it’s not a big deal. If our kids hated a daycare and begged us not to take them, we’d find a new daycare pretty quick. Why should school be different? Maybe it would be worth looking into alternative classrooms or schools within your district, or even homeschooling. Also, it would give you some time to be with him if lack of attention from you is a problem. Now that I think of it, going to school may feel like you are abandoning him. I remember feeling that way myself - I couldn’t understand how my Mom could leave me with these people that I didn’t know. I was terrified of school, and only went because I was too scared of adults to resist. I hated almost every minute of it, and graduating from high school for me felt like being freed from a prison camp. Education shouldn’t be like that. If he already hates it, the time to act is now - don’t wait until he gets totally turned off to education.

Hope that helps!

[quote:5ca3fcde94=”Steve”]Probably Tenex. It’s a blod pressure medication that is generally a “downer”, causing relaxation, sometimes sleepiness, lower heart rate and of couse lower blood pressure.

One thing to consider is that stimulants can increase aggressiveness, and can exacerbate anxiety and/or depression.

It sounds like he is pretty unhappy with school. I agree that this is not normal or healthy. None of us like having to go to a place we dislike every day, but for some reason, we seem to think that kids hating school is “normal” and that it’s not a big deal. If our kids hated a daycare and begged us not to take them, we’d find a new daycare pretty quick. Why should school be different? Maybe it would be worth looking into alternative classrooms or schools within your district, or even homeschooling. Also, it would give you some time to be with him if lack of attention from you is a problem. Now that I think of it, going to school may feel like you are abandoning him. I remember feeling that way myself - I couldn’t understand how my Mom could leave me with these people that I didn’t know. I was terrified of school, and only went because I was too scared of adults to resist. I hated almost every minute of it, and graduating from high school for me felt like being freed from a prison camp. Education shouldn’t be like that. If he already hates it, the time to act is now - don’t wait until he gets totally turned off to education.

Hope that helps![/quote]

WRONG! Stimulants 99% of the time calm children. Stims are given to hyperactive kid to calm them down.

The 6 year old in question is having an emotional reaction to something and because he is a child he cannot express what it is so he is acting out.

Where is your support for that 99% figure? Also, the idea that stimulants “calm” hyperactive children is extremely outdated, according to my research. Stimulants stimulate - Russell Barclay’s theory (which I tend to agree with) is that these kids are seeking stimulation in the environment, hence they engage in high physical activity and seek conflict or attend to interesting stimuli other than what they are “supposed to” be attending to. The stimulants provide artificial stimulation to the brain so the hyperactive child is no longer seeking these external stimuli, so the theory goes. Also, Judith Rappoport (I can’t find the reference today, but I am looking) pretty firmly showed back in about 1978 or ‘79 that non-hyperactive kids reacted in much the same way as hyperactive kids to stimulants. The “paradoxical effect” is essentially a myth. You wouldn’t get an argument from Barclay or Swanson or even the most pro-medication researchers in the field on this point. That’s why response to medication is not diagnostic.

I’ll keep looking for that Rappoport reference if you are interested.

P.S. I consider it rude to start postings with the word “WRONG!” I’d appreciate a little more respect in future postings. Thanks in advance!

Oh, and stimulants CAN cause increases in aggressive behavior. Look at the product information in the PDR or on Medscape. I have also seen it in my work.