Hopping mad, school's attitude stinks! need advice

Kelli,

Follow your gut, you know your kid. Just from reading your post I’ll make a leap here and tell you she sounds like a Gifted/Learning Disabled kid. I have three of them, 14, 9 & 6.

I would put in writing that you want testing to be done including an IQ test and achedemic testing. My kids looked like they were OK but when the demands cam on them they feel apart. They use everything they have and because of their intellegence look “average” but not trying. When in fact they are trying very hard but are frustrated. Get specific in the area that you suspect a disability, ie: visual, visual motor, auditiory, reading , writing, receptive languange…

Gotta go to a meeting

Leah

Write them a request for a speech evaluation. It sounds like that is a component that is making the school work harder.It will affect math especially with word problems.Good luck!

Read my micamom posts in “parenting a child with ADHD” dated 9/14/02 and 9/15/02.

I was fortunate enough to find a parent advocate to work with me and she has given me some really good advice about dealing with the school.

Who is saying that a D is an ok grade? When I was in school a D was not that great of a grade!! Is your daughter having trouble understanding when people speak? That is an auditory processing issue, you might want to consider and eval by an audiologist for that! Also, it is my understanding that once you ask for testing it must be done.

Anyhow, you should find out what the law is in your state as far as test completions and having a meeting to review the testing done.

Also, send a letter like the one below to the school. Make sure you do everything in writing. There are other letters available at www.concordspedpac.org

Finally, I second the opinion of find an advocate, who can attend meetings and explain testing results

K.

Name of your district or school sped director
Your Public Schools
120 Your street
Your Town, MA 00000

Your name
address
Your town, MA 00000
Day phone number to contact you

RE: students name
school building and grade level

Date: n/nn/nn

Dear Sped Director,

We are requesting an evaluation for our child, your child’s name and date of birth. We would like the assessment to include testing in (one or all) of the the following areas:

Educational (for Reading, Writing, Spelling and Math)
Speech and Language (include: Phonemic Awareness)
Occupational Therapy
Psychological (Can include: WISC, Behavior Assessment (BASC),
Conners Rating Inventory)
Functional Behavioral Assessment

We would like to meet with the Team chairperson before the testing begins so that we might share information about our child’s name. Learn about the procedure and find out who will be doing the different testing. We would like a copy of the written reports from each testor so that we can review them before the Team meeting.
Or

I understand that I have to give my written permission for these tests to be done. I look forward to meeting with you and signing the proper forms.

I would like these evaluations and Team meeting to be completed before the end of the school year.

Or

I will call you on (3 days from the date on this letter) to set up an appointment with the Team chair.

Thank you for your prompt consideration in this matter.

Sincerely,

sign and print your and spouses name

c.c. Your Classroom Teacher

I would definitely put it in writing that you are requesting an eval. send it certified. I will also go out on a limb and say that this kids sounds like she had some sort of non-language based as well as language based LD. she certainly fits the “usual” profile of a Gifted/LD child. I think that by agreeing to the eval for a 504, they are leaning toward ADHD, which could also be the base of her problems. It is really hard to learn what you are supposed to if you can’t focus for more than a few minutes. One thing, NOT to criticize, but I would be all over anyone who says “she just needs to try harder” This is almost always a cop out on the teachers part. It is to say that the teacher is doing everything right, and the child is capable of doing everything right and just isn’t doing it. The ONLY one who KNOWS how hard she is trying is her. Also, I would lean a little more toward labeling her as hyper or overyly loving, rather than annoying. Again, not to criticize, but when a child is refered to as annoying, to me it says that the child can do something about it, and most of these kids can’t!!!
wir2

Thank you all for your answers. I”m definately going to mail a certified letter and I’ve decided I”m giong to have her evaluated by someone else as a secondary opinion regardless of what the school comes up with.

I did “jump all over” the teachers about saying she just needs to try harder. I told them in no uncertain terms that we had already been down that road and she is trying as hard as she can.

Don’t get me wrong about labeling her, I should have clarified that statement I guess. I don’t call her annoying (or any of the other labels) these are things that others have said. she even had one girl tell her that all the other kids she hung around with and their parents thought this about her. it has really been catastrophic to her self esteem which is already very low. I was reading how some kids with a ld are unable to recognize facial expressions, body language and cues to determine whether their actions are appropriate. I”m wondering if that’s the case with Sam because she just doesn’t seem to be able to know when to stop and she can almost never tell when she’s being joked with especially if it’s in dry humor or sarcastic. To me her abundance of energy and so called peskiness is just an over abundance of joy and expression of affection. I don’t think she’s doing it to be annoying, she just can’t tell when it gets to the point of pain or irritation. she’s nearly crushed my lungs in bear hugs lots of times, but what can you say to that? I just say she loves me and I love her.

So other than auditory testing, what other kinds of tests should I request?

thanks again
Kelli

Why did you wait so long to pursue help? There can be many things wrong, but you won’t know until you test her. Since you asked the school to test her, they should do so. How is her reading? I would think that if she has a reading problem, this should be remediated first.

Kelli,

Your description to me sounds like a child who is not paying attention. Now, there are different ways of looking at this. Perhaps she has an LD (the reading the clock thing screams visual processing) that causes a problem with attention or it is adhd.

I don’t think you will get tons of help from the school either way. The testing needs to be done and may point you in the direction you need to go.

Good Luck!

Linda

let me give you a little background on Sam and me. She is not biologically my daughter. I met her father when she 7 and we all became a family when she was 8. At that time I noticed she had some really bad reading problems. I also found out that the school ASSUMED she was hispanic because she had black hair, brown eyes and olive skin. so they slapped her in all hispanic classes with english as a 2nd language. Her father, being a single father working 12 hours a day was clueless. They never notified him of this and when he went to teacher conferences the teachers told him everything was just fine. They had her in spanish classes from K-3rd grade. We got her out of there right away but the damage had been done. Immediately we started working on the reading and it improved greatly, but she still wasn’t where she needed to be. it’s something we’ve continued to work on all this time.

Her mother has not had anything to do with her and Sam suffers from abandonment issues as well as academic issues.

I didn’t request help earlier because to be honest with you, I didn’t realize there could be a problem. The only reason I started speculating a problem is because my son has a blatant LD, and after spending lots of time here reading I started realizing Sam has been displaying signs of some of the things I’ve read here.

I always figured Sam to be bright and intelligent, just over exuberant. But some kids are that way. I also thought she was being lazy, I dunno but she just acted lazy. now I see that it MAY not have been the case. she might have something else going on that causes her to do the things she does. I also don’t want to put something there that isn’t there. If she doesn’t have a LD then I guess we’ll just have to figure out how to help her keep going but I really really suspect there’s something else going on. I feel like I’m grasping straw here, but I don’t think her behavior is “normal” for a lack of a better word. There’s something…I dunno what, but there’s something that is the root cause for her struggles. Her and I have a fantastic repore and I love her like she’s mine. All I want is to find a way to help her, nobody should have to go through life with the labels that have been placed on her. She shouldn’t have to feel so bad about herself because teachers and others feel she just doesn’t try hard enough.

As for paying attention, I agree with you. I don’t think she’s paying attention but I also think that it’s not because she’s just being a kid, I think there’s a reason why. She says she doesn’t understand what they say so I think she’s not paying attention because in her mind why bother when she’s just going to get the answers wrong anyway.

Last year she wasn’t turning in her homework. I found it all in her backpack and it was completed. She said she wasn’t turning it in because she was just going to get an F on it anyway so why waste the time.

We’re both strugglign with this and I’m taking all of your advice seriously. I really appreciate the help.

Kelli

Kelli,

I am going to give you very different advice than you have been given thus far. You need to make an appointment with a clinical child psychologist and have Samantha evaluated. I suspect there are problems that are not just educational. Yes, she may need reading remediation and you can get a wealth of information on this site. But this child has emotional issues that may possibly require therapy and maybe medication. The schools are absolutely NOT the ones to be diagnoing or treating emotional/mental disorders. Please at least have her evaluated.

Janis

Janis recommended a psycologist but I would go further than that and get an neuro-psychologist who specializes in adolecents. This way you can get a total summary of her learning and emotional issues. I did that for my son and it was this biggest window into his being and behaviors. It really gave me a roadmap to follow.
I had a psychologist evaluate my other son and I really found a lot of flaws on her reasoning and testing. Luckily my HMO paid for that one or I would have been angry, not just dissapointed.

Good idea, Robin.

Janis

I’m confused where you would get gifted out of the description.

To be honest, I am having trouble “gifted” thing.

Gifted/talented? What the heck does that mean? The chosen children? The only ones the good Lord blessed with gifts and talents. This term is such a slap in the face to any average or disabled child. My child has no gifts or talents? I have no gifts or talents?

I think a better description for this elite (which isn’t really that elite anymore since everyone thinks their kid should be in the gifted program) group is advanced or accelerated.

Curriculums have been sooooo watered down to accomodate inclusion-lovers that when a child does well in a subject or two, parents insist the kid is “gifted.”

My, my, my someone had a bad day!!

I think that you are right that all children are gifted but sometimes we must follow the rules set up by the schools and go with the “label” they have created!

I guess it would have been more of a slap if she had said “My child is gifted and yours is not!”

K.

What does she say about this, and have you talked about these issues? My off-the-top-of-my-head thoughts, take what works :)
You might want to sit her down & tell her that you just have a feeling that she’s having a rough time and you know there’s an incredible human being sitting in front of you that you want to help grow into a wonderful adult… and talk *with* her about how things are going to see if she can come around to the idea that going through this testing is not, somehow, yet another nail in the self-esteem coffin to show that there’s really something inherently wrong wiht her (so, no wonder she was abandoned — no, not logical thinking, but human).
The more she is a critical part of this process the better for all of you. Figure out what academic and social priorities should be — whether it’s figuring out how to make/keep friends and get some social skills under her belt (and consider some new social venues where she could have a fresh start, where people didn’t alreayd have her on the “oh, *her*” list), or focusing on one academic skill or class so that she could make progress and see it happening (whether with formal help from the school or not) so that even if other things are still issues she can be less overwhelmed. Kelli wrote:
>
> although I’ve been hanging around here for months I’ve only
> posted once about my son’s disgraphia. now I have a new
> problem.
>
> Today I went to my daughters high school to talk with her
> counselor/teachers about problems she’s having. Let me
> explain a bit about Samantha.
>
> Samantha is typically referred to as dingy, lazy, annoying,
> pesky and “not very bright” by those that know her. Her
> teachers have always said she needs to try harder, apply
> herself more and study harder. She is an exuberant child
> that does tend to annoy you by constantly jumping on you,
> hanging on you smacking big wet kisses on your cheeks and
> doing annoying things that seem somewhat obnoxious. We used
> to tell her to calm down, keep both feet on the floor and
> stop acting like she’s 3. But there are other
> problem….lots of other problems.
>
> In elementary school she had average grades and very little
> homework. Teachers said everything was fine. However at
> home she was fidgety, unable to follow directions (especially
> something that required her to do more than one thing at at
> ime) unless we were there guiding her through the tast. She
> has always had low self esteem, inability to express herself,
> poor vocabulary, difficulty problem solving, trouble with
> memorization and very immature for her age.
>
> When middle school came things go rocky. VERY rocky! her
> grades went down, her teachers said she should again, try
> harder, apply herself and study more. She wasn’t able to
> comprehend what she was reading, she started failing math and
> her self esteem went out the window completely. It has been
> only by us staying on top of her, frustration and long long
> hours of studying that she managed to get c grades.
>
> Now she’s a freshman in high school and within 2 months of
> school starting the problems are back. Now worse. I made a
> list of some things that I noticed and here’s what they are
> and many of them have always affected her.
>
> easily distracted
> forgetful, more than normal
> lack of motivation
> unable to follow instructions
> unable to visualize what she has read
> unable to comprehend conversation without in depth explanation
> inability to organize
> does not complete things (this is a BIG one with her)
> poor vocabulary and spelling
> trouble with memorization
> impatient, can’t focus
> become bored with conversations and tunes out
> can not tell time unless it’s a digital clock
> doesn’t take pride in her work or self
> doesn’t seem to process information well
> can’t find words to express what she’s thinking
> can’t convey what she learns on tests and homework papers
> sleeping problems
> headaches
>
> I know some of these are normal teenage things but they have
> plagued her forever so I don’t know how much is actually
> teenage stuff vs problems.
>
> The school psychologist and counselors and teachers met with
> us and they basically said that according to her letter
> grades she’s doing fine. They didn’t seem to think she has a
> problem at all. They think I have no validation in
> requesting an evaluation. I told them that I know how kids
> with problems can mask it by surviving or using a coping
> method they come up with. My gut feeling, deep down, is
> there’s something…something I don’t know about, that is
> affecting her. Just because she manages to get c grades
> after nearly killing herself with work is not enough proof to
> me that there isn’t a problem. They just keep saying she
> needs to work harder. She is working harder, in fact, this
> year she’s worked harder than she ever has and with still no
> results.
>
> She’s been tutoring in math now everyday after school for an
> hour and her grade is still a D. She comes home and tells me
> she doesn’t understand what her teachers are telling her and
> yet they claim she understand what’s going on in the classroom.
>
> I did talk them into evaluating her, they said they would
> evaluate her for a 504 rather than for special needs. they
> are going to pull her out of class sometime within 50 days
> and test her. they won’t be notifying me the day she will be
> tested. she’s in line with other students that are flagged by
> them for testing.
>
> I feel as if I should be receiving more help than this. Just
> because her grades show her to be “ok” doesn’t mean
> everything is honkey dorey and I feel like I”m being
> patronized.
>
> What should I do? What can I do? There has to be something
> more, I really don’t think they will find anything when they
> test her because I think they don’t want to. What do you all
> think..am I being ridiculous in my assumptions or should I be
> getting better assistance?
>
> Thank you all in advance
> Kelli

At the risk of being accused of diagnosing your daughter,and I didn’t read ALL the above posts,so if this was already stated,sorry for restating it. Have you considered that your daughter might be ADHD?? The symptoms you describe are like big strobe lights flickering in my mind. I would most definitely check into this possibility,ADHD can cause as much educational devestation as any ld and 30% have LD along with ADHD.

About what they say they will evaluate for. Hmm,yet another school district with delusions of granduer. THEY can NOT decide WHAT they will evaluate for,this would be an admission of skewing scores anyway! I would write a letter and get this stupid comment in writing. Then I would let them test. Once they do,I would bring up my concerns about their ability to test appropriately and demand an independent evaluation at the districts expense. It is part of your rights as a parent,you can find this in the procedural safeguard rights of IDEA,which by the way,according to this law,they MUST give you a copy when you sign the consent for her testing!!!!Then I would find a good evaluator with NO ties to the school system,and have her fully evaluated for ADD and LD. If you NEVER use these for high school,she will still need them for college.

Actually, I was having quite a good day, thanks.

The problem (((is))) the labels. Parents here don’t want a label put on their disabled child, yet the parent of a gifted and talented child is more than willing to flaunt the label. Why is the label okay when it is favorable and exaggerated and not a disability? My son asked me why the teachers think Mike, Ellie and Danny, Olivia and Sarah are the only talented ones in his class. He says he has talents too.

What would you suggest I tell this child? That his label is LD and we try to hide that one because people tend to think that means he’s retarded or stupid?

I don’t like the term “gifted” either, because I believe every person has his own gifts. Nevertheless, when schools use that term, they are referring to those who have outstanding academic aptitude or performance (or both). Of course there are many people who are wonderful artists, athletes or musicians, or are terrific friends and parents, etc., and they are “gifted” too. In school, however, we are mainly concerned with academics and, just as some people are graced with outstanding athletic ability, others are graced with outstanding intellectual ability. Why would you honor one but not the other? I am the parent of child who has academic aptitude in the 99.99+ percentile for his age, along with extremely significant learning disabilities, and I think both should be recognized. I’d prefer it if there was a better way to describe his intellectual abilities, but “gifted” is the one schools are using.

Andrea

I would see this as a great opportunity to teach some advocacy skills. First of all if this were my child and he came home and said that the teacher said only Mike, Ellie and Danny, Olivia and Sarah were talented. Naturally, I would have to make an appt to meet with my child’s teacher.

I would however explain to my child that all children are talented and gifted and point out whatever he is gifted at. Secondly, I would give him the old “sticks and stones may break my bones but names will never hurt me” It may sound silly but that is how my parents taught me, that it didn’t matter what anyone called me, that was there right and trust me, I had my share of name throwing when I was the only girl in an all male trade at a vocational high school.

My son knows that his brain learns differently then his friends but he also knows how great and special he is. That he is a great singer, dancer, and artist. How he has learned to be a great friend and what is important in life!! I also have to say that the two older kids, my brother and sister, are compassionate caring, and loving children, despite having some fairly severe disabilities. They are just words, it is their actions that I work on!

I guess everyone feels differently, its just words and if you teach your child to remind the teacher, “Hey, guess what, I am talented and gifted too!!” They will learn how to use actions and speak up for themselves!!

I also mentioned in the beginning that I would talk with the teacher. I would explain that you would prefer if she not refer to talent and gifts of particular children, that you just wanted to remind her that all children have gifts and special talents, that all children are different and that you know they are a caring teacher who wants the best for your child and wouldn’t purposely hurt their feelings and take shots at there self-esteem!

Just my opinion!
K

Well, your advice sounds great in the perfect world and it is very valuable.

But, the real issue was not addressed. Why do we blatently flaunt, accept and even welcome the label of gifted. And why do soooooo many parents believe that their child ((is)) gifted? It just isn’t true though they want it to be.

The teacher knows that all children have gifts and talents. It is the parents of these children who have insisted that the label be in place and displayed proundly to the point of nauseum.

My point is that we are all asking for the same thing, yet there is no finger pointing at the “gifted” parent. That parent is viewed at simply wants the best for their child and is entitled to the differentiated instruction and its a GOOD THING. But, the disabled child’s parent is accussed of pushing the district to its limits and asking for the world. And viewed as asking for more than the child is capable of doing since he will “probably” not be as successful as the gifted child (their perspective, not mine).

Our district recently held its first monthly gifted parents support group and passed out fliers to the entire district. There are approximately 600 children in our whole district. The final count on the sign in sheet for this meeting was 232 parents. These parents came in because they believe their children are gifted. If this is the case, there is something in our water here.

We are using the term gifted too loosely and why? The answer is because the CURRENT general education classroom is not meeting the needs of the students. The fact of the matter is that the teacher is spending so much time accomodating EVERY INDIVIDUAL that she really ISN’T helping anyone.

We are not breeding that many geniuses. We have had this discussion before (I believe with Shay) that the quality of work that comes from high school and college students does not support the amount of people who claim that their child employable let alone that he/she is gifted.

Basically, I have a big problem with the selected choice of words to describe this group of children. It damages every other child’s self-esteem.

If children were separated according to ability, then lessons, environment and teacher qualification could be adjusted accordingly and no one would know who is the “advanced” student and who struggles with a learning disability.

Right now, in the current classroom environment, each child is forced to take a ranking (high achiever through low achiever) whether you choose to believe that or not.

My child with LD was placed in a gifted cluster room so that they could even out their levels of all ability within each classroom and it was the most tragic year to date.

In our district the “gifted” parents are fighting to get their “children with special needs (but they refuse to be identified with our kids with special needs)” out of the general classroom because THEIR needs are not being met.

It’s just so ridiculous how we view these as two separate issues (positive vs. negative) when truly we are asking for the same things for our kids.

I guess this is the reason I did not enroll my son is public school. Why put any emphasis on what the school says or what other parents think! Right now I only care how my son is doing and that he is getting the best education or services.

Why not go to the meeting for gifted children and offer to speak, on behalf of all the sped parents who do feel concerned with the labels.

I have way to much going on to have to worry about a label. I guess I am lucky in two respects, first, of all the troubles we have had with the school, I have two siblings still in public, we have never had label troubles. Second, I guess my world is a lot more perfect than I thought because my kids, brother and sister included, don’t put labels on people!!

I guess if this is an issue in your district, you should handle it and get involved. There is not sense in just complaining about it, change the system!!

Finally, you said “Why do we blatently flaunt, accept and even welcome the label of gifted. And why do soooooo many parents believe that their child ((is)) gifted? It just isn’t true though they want it to be.” First, who is allowing the flaunting and accepting, the parents, not the kids! Most kids start out without the ability to catergorize each other. Go visit a nursery classroom, most kids are playing together, regardless of age, race, sex, it is only as they age do they change. Also, why isn’t ok for parents to feel their child is gifted? That is what confuses me, what should anyone care how I refer to my child, as long as I am not shoving done your throat and forcing everyone else to accept the label!

K.

Actually, Alou, I have heard many parents of children who have been identified as academically “gifted” complain that their children get nothing and have to languish in the classroom while children in special ed get all the support. I’ve also heard parents complain that parents go doctor-shopping so that they can get an LD diagnosis and their child can get extra time on the SAT, even though the LD is really made up. In other words, how you view things depends a lot on where you are sitting. In my opinion, this kind of sniping helps no one. Children with learning disabilities need and are entitled to support and challenges in school. Children with high levels of intelligence need and are entitled to the same thing. A free and appropriate education means that different children need different things. Every person is a gift but all people are not equally good at all things. The problems arise when schools lump everyone together rather than differentiating. It gets worse when parents start blaming or ridiculing each other (and, by extension, the children) rather than working together to ensure that everyone gets what they need. You say “It’s just so ridiculous how we view these as two separate issues (positive vs. negative) when truly we are asking for the same things for our kids,” but if you really believe that you might consider refraining from mocking parents and children who have that GT label of which you seem to disapprove. My child has both labels and both are equally imporant to understanding and addressing his educational needs.

Andrea

I think you hit all of the points that I did and basically you agree.

I don’t think that I am mocking parents (children) because that would mean to imitate them, which I certainly am not.

I, too, believe that children in the public school setting should have their issues addressed. And maybe you missed my point that our current classroom environment is not conducive to addressing everyone’s needs. The system wants them all to be the same, so they treat them the same and its not working.

I find it disturbing that a parent would go doctor shopping for a dx when nothing exists. I certainly hope that this is not true.

The point that started this whole thing was that fact that the original poster had a list of symptoms and the person that replied came up with gifted mostly because the child was bored and restless in the classroom. This basically is an example of how this child’s needs are not being met because the teacher has to spread herself/himself thin to barely cover all of the individual’s needs thanks to misinterpretation and abuse of inclusion.

I would be willing to bet that if we all took a good (educated) look at what was going on and stopped forcing all of these children into an environment that was inappropriate for them (e.g.: start grouping by ability and providing a qualified instructor for that level of ability) identification for LD and gifted would drop significantly.

General statements should not be made. Not all parents go shopping for labels so little Johnny or Sussie can get extra time on the SAT. I have two children with special needs and I had concerns for them way before I would of ever thought about the impact their difficulties would have a high stake tests such as the SAT. Who cares about the SAT if you have a child who can not communicatte? Who cares about the SAT if you have a child who can not read. My concern for both my kids were before the age of 5 and they were even in school. It was really difficult to get services but I persisted until they were offered, I still struggle to this day to get my kids what they need so they can function in our society. I don’t care if they ever take the SAT but I do care if they can function in our society this includes reading and writing at a level that is employable. ALL children deserve to be taught to the best of his or her ability and not just the kids who are way behind or way ahead but ALL. No one group is better then the other they each just have different needs.

Well, actually I ((am)) trying to change things in my district and that is why this struck such a nerve.

Many gifted families believe they are above and beyond what LD families are going through. They believe they are on opposite ends of the spectrum. When I listened to their speaker, she described everything that LD families go through.

When I brought this up in a question form to the speaker, she had nothing to say other than that my comment was interesting.

LD families resist labels, the ones who believe that their child is gifted seek the label out sometimes at great costs.

You view my posts as an attack. If you would read it carefully you would see that we are on the same page.

“General statements should not be made.”

Exactly my point. I am not saying I agree with the parents who say people are going shopping for a LD label. I don’t. My kid HAS that label and I know how important accomodations are to him. I also don’t agree with those who deride parents who seek to have their child’s academic “giftedness” recognized. My kid has that label too and I know how much he needs intellectual stimulation as well.

I agree that these kids need to be identified. These kids can end up doing as Shay has seen barely able to function in the real world unless they are dealt with in the correct manner. I think that is the point.

I have a child who does better with higher level thinking and poorly with task oriented skills. So the schools way of dealing with this was to keep making the work easier. The easier they made it the harder it was for him. I finally got him in a regular classroom away from the very not so special, sped and he is doing well.
Ok, so maybe he isn’t gifted/LD. But he sure is something that they aren’t figuring out. I am sorry but I think you need to play to a child’s strengths. If they are gifted as many children with LD are, it needs to be recognized and dealt with. It shouldn’t matter if this is somehow insulting to someone. This child has specific needs that are different and that need to be dealt with differently. I really don’t like labels and don’t see a need for them but it just seems when anyone brings up this particular issue (and this is a real issue many face) people get uptight and take it as some kind of personal offense. I think that is sad for the kids who face the problems of having dual exceptionalities. And yes, this is a problem. These kids struggle with trying to be understood.
Many of the kids who perform well in school are not particularly gifted because it takes very little higher level thinking to do well in school especially in the lower grades. You need to separate the issue that you face in your school district from the very real issue children with 2 types of special needs face.

And don’t worry, the school is not overclassifying these kids. They more often do not get picked up as gifted because of their LD. Schools are resistant to giving them help that will address their second special need.

Many of these kids function at a very low level. The face predjudice from both sides. The regular ed group (kids who do well in school) think they don’t fit with them. The ld group (as you have clearly shown by your first post) produce the, “Who do you think you are.” attitude.
Let’s just identify the needs of all children and deal with them the best we can.

well I don’t know how my needing advice spurred such a controversial debate but either way I won’t go into because I don’t really know enough about it politically wise to offer a comment. I DID however learn some things and that I appreciate.

Sue, before we even approached the school we sat Sam down and talked to her. She’s so miserable with her situation that she doesn’t see it as a blow to her self-esteem. She really really wholeheartedly wants help. She doesn’t want to continue on this way.

The pulled her out of class today for 2 1/2 hours today and did a bunch of testing. I have no idea what they found. I will be calling tomorrow to see what they’re results are.

Also, I will take your advice, I’m going to go look up my rights to have her privately tested and print them out, then march in there and demand it.

I will let you all know how it goes.

Kelli,

If there is a possibility that this child has ADHD, you need to understand that that is a medical diagnosos and the school is really not obligated to pay for that evaluation as far as I know. I’d try to get the doctor to refer me to someone who specializes in ADHD and get your insurance to cover it.

Janis

thank you Janis. that’s another thing I didn’t know. I’ll make sure I keep that in mind. well I”m off to call the school to find out what they came up with at this point.