List Moderator??

Hi mmm,

If you go to the LD Online home page and then e-mail them, they will usually remove offensive posts.

Lil

I’m not sure I saw “rabid one-issue nutters” about medication issues. I think many people have concerns about whether medication is truly a valid option. I know I have my concerns, but would never judge a parent’s decision. I would question why one would not be open to others opinions. They may bring up something you may have never considered.

But if you are comfortable in your decision for your child, what difference does it make what others say? It never hurts to hear other opinions and engage in debate.

Defensiveness may come from a lack of confidence in one’s decision?

Wei Yin posted this message: “I say stop expirementing with pills. Read the labels ask questions because your kids are not lab rats. See how the kids can do
without pills.”

Look around at what wie wiu or whoever has been posting all over the bb’s. He or she is using variations of the name. This is not a particularly informed person, it is someone who intends to inflame the other posters. IGNORE them.
The more you reply the more attention this person is getting.

I agree with Amy. Ignoring them helps keep the board responses more focused on what we want to talk about. I didn’t find that one particularly bad (although I disagreed with it), and to Rita’s point, we all need to respect that we may have different opinions. This is, after all, a discussion board.

I myself am a little concerned about the issue on whether to medicate or not. I have reseached till i am blue in the face and i think that as parents we sometimes are gulible, we will believe anything that family Dr.’s and schools tell us about our children. Please dont feel like I am passing judement on any parent, not the case at all. I personally blame the inexperience of family doctors that are prescribing these stimulants (or mind ultering drugs) and i also blame the companies that make these drugs. They arent worried about our children. They are only concerned with selling their product and make money doing so, apparently that isnt too much of a problem for them.
In some cases it is necessary to medicate, but i dont feel medicating or even labeling a child with adhd, when the problems very well could be something else.
What happens after the medication periods?
Do we medicate for life?
Are we as parent doing more damage covering up problems with meds? What do we do when the television tells us that there is another child mental health issue that mimics our childs behavior?
I give all parents who were faced with the issue to medicate strength to find alternatives, if not now, down the road.
Good luck to all parents
Please remember im not judging your decisions, as
a parent with a child that has been labeled adhd, i understand!!!!!
GOOD LUCK !!!

I think it is healthy to raise questions about drugs and what services we get from the professionals don’t you ?

Yes i definately feel that its healthy to raise questions and sometimes challange professionals.
I believe that every human being has the right to know the truth and I mean the complete truth about illnesses, dianosises, and medications. Most of all i know there are many alternatives to these dangerous medications Dr.’s and school’s push a parent to consider, but of coarse the dont give you the alternatives. I totally believe in knowing facts.
Facts will keep our chilren safe.
IM not going to say i am for the meds nor will i say im against them, oblivious they work for the ones that need them.
I am saying im PRO FACT!
Please respond to this, i would like to hear from people.
KNOWLEDGE IS POWER

I feel like all you want to hear are other parents who are in a bind that are dealing with this so called illness as you and because someone else has a totally different opinion, for what ever reason, you say just ignore them. This is a bulletine board for people to talk with people about certain situations and by ignoring people you dont agree with,makes the situation so much harder for everyone.
Now you expect people to sympathize your situations but youre not willing to understand thiers.
I understand sometimes it feels like your being judged and unfortunately sometimes that very well may be the case but with this situation arent we all being judged regardless of our choice to med or not.
This is the typical damned if you do damned if you dont situation.
Basically you dont have to agree with everything that you read on these boards, nor is it the purpose.
But maybe that is what is wrong with the world , no one wants to listen and no one cares about someone with differences, and that is a terrible thing to teach .
Just Remember our kids are labeled and that should make the difference.

concerned,
your argument is sound and rational, the other person’s was not. Maybe you don’t surf all the boards but I do and found the same person making declarative statements that basically told folks they were neglecting their children or themselves by using medicine for this problem. This is someone I call an agitator. Scientific and rational I will listen to, declarative value judgement statements are inflammatory.

Mamm:

This is what is wrong with American Society today. Nobody wants to pass judgements on anybody. I heard some people a few years back trying to defend Ted Bundy; John Hinckley and yes: even believe it or not buying Charles Manson’s stuff on ebay. Okay: yes, People who beleive meds and shrinks are the answer to the kid’s problems are placing kids health in danger. I know of people who used those pills as kids and later found it hard to get a clearance in the government when they became adults. Why ? Because. it is a matter of judgement and self-control. They will not place trust in a medicated person working in Defense or as an air traffic controller.

Also, we Americans pass judgements on other societies and countries all the time. Yet, some of us cannot stand it if we are critcized for the life or decisions we lead our lives by. EX: Iran: it is evil because it doesn’t believe as we do. Let x-rated movies in, it is bad… Think about it ???

Im not familiar with all the bulletine boards, but i am interested. How do i get to these other boards?
Thank you for considering what i say sound and rational, as everyone i am learning as i go also and want to help with some of the pros and cons about this situation which i find fact.

point well taken

i understand what you are saying i did search the other boards, and read some of the comments.
Sometimes people say harsh things to get thier points across, just like you did about ignoring them.
Try not to take everything to heart, even though i know from experiences that is easier said than done.
By the way the only way to neglect your child in this situation is to not care, obviously you do care.
Nothing we do now days pleases everyone, how boring would life be if that were the case.
Take care, hope to hear things are continuing to go well for you and your family.

No, this is because the government has not caught up with medical research. The government and military consider ADHD to be a medical problem up until the age of 12 and after that to be a psychological problem. Anyone can be medicated up until the age of 12, it is after the age of 12 that is an issue. However, as the government does not always make sense, it is fine if they were diagnosed AFTER already being in the service.

Just because the government is running behind the times, doesn’t mean we shouldn’t do our own research and keep up with the current research. Being opposed to medication is your opinion and you have the right to express it, but please do not shove your opinion down our throats.

I am very sorry you feel like i am shoving anything down your throat, apparently you havent read all my comments, i have never stated that i opposed medicating nor have i approve to it either.
maybe you made a decision that you are not comfortable with, therefore you need to deal with that for yourself. I personally dont care what your choice is , was, or will be.

This appears to pretty much be an unmoderated list (which includes a clear cautionary disclaimer to that effect as I recall) based on the idea of a very free expression of many ideas about ADHD. That’s my initial impression.

By the way, agree with you that there is a small group of anti-ADHD medicine cultists who try to fib away the existence of ADHD and the known fact that for some people, both children and adults, the ADHD meds (the stimulants/alerting agents) actually do temporarily reduce ADHD symptoms.

The anti-ADHD med cultists believe the earth is flat/end of their cult story/convert or die.

The anti-ADHD medicines ever cultists should be condemned for their ignorance and dangerous ideas they give people as to what ADHD is and is not.

The anti-ADHD medicine ever people can waste a lot of time, a lot of money, and even worse - put incorrect ideas into people’s heads as to what ADHD is and isn’t. The anti-ADHD medicine people want people to travel only by horseback and they get quite upset when Henry Ford’s motor car (a symbol of enlightenment/the ADHD medicines and other modern treatments) is ever mentioned.

http://www.nimh.nih.gov/publicat/adhd.cfm

That’s my view.

Nobody shoves stuff down anyone’s throat. If you believe diffrent, you can. What I and a few others are doing is to expose people to other points of view. What crime is that ? As for the NIH site: It is a bit of politics that decide what research gets funded and whose views are published. People need to do their own research and by the way: Medications do have side effects and some of that stuff can be deadly. Prozac for instance: has been linked to several crimes done by ex-Vietnam servicemen who have been dosed regularly on that dope to control their depression. As for drugs: no one on this board who advocates diffrent never said drugs were never to be used. We only said it should not be a first option all the time. Perhaps, one can please think it over before just going to get a quick fix. Get two or three opinions from diffrent doctors or other health professionalists nutritionists etc. As for Henry Ford’s horseless buggy: It is good and bad. BMW motorbikes with sidecars are soo much better. Less gas and less pollution.

I am sorry that you thought my post was directed toward you because, if I read your post correctly, you understand that everyone has the right to make and post their own decisions. The problems is the rude comments that are directed towards the choices of others. People come here for support and when rude comments attacking their choices are made, they are afraid to come back.

Without the use of these meds, some children will never learn they are capable once they are able to focus. I don’t care if my child works for the government or is an air traffic controller. I want her to grow up, have intact self esteem and graduate from high school and college. I also don’t want her riding her bike or driving a car without her medication.

Use of meds is a personal decision. One that every parent thinks long and hard about. I think we should continue to support each other regardless of the medicate/non-medicate decision.

BEVERLY,
YOU ACT AS IF THESE DRUGS ARE MIRACLE DRUGS! WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN TAKING?
IM NOT SURE I WOULD WANT MY CHILD DRIVING ON A DRUG LIKE THESE. SELF ESTEEM SHOULD START AT HOME AND NOT WITH A PILL. EVEN THOUGH I REALLY DISAGREE WITH MOST OF WHAT YOU WROTE I RESPECT THE FACT THAT YOU JOINED THE CONVERSATION AND I AGREE THAT WE SHOULD SUPPORT EACH OTHER REGARDLESS. PLEASE DONT BE NIEVE ABOUT ALL PARENTS THINKING LONG AND HARD ABOUT MEDICATING, TRUST ME NOT THE CASE, SOME PARENTS, NOT ALL , I WOULD GO AS FAR AS TO SAY NOT MOST EITHER.

The lab rat thing was clearly beyond any rational sense of decency. It was not meant to be helpful. It was hateful, pure and simple. That type of thing is well worth ignoring.

sorry beverly, i sent the previous reply and directed it to you and was wrong person.
The message was supposed to go to LEAH
My appology to Beverly
(reading to much of the boards)

who mentioned the lab rat theory, i must have missed it!!!

There is no “lab rat theory”. It was an unkind remark. I’ll be nice and spare the author further shame. This person accused another person of using her child as a lab rat because she used medication. I found it offensive.

Thanks for clarifying that, I ws trying to figure out what could have upset someone…but with the posts going on it is hard to follow…..enjoy your Thanksgiving.

Nicely said Rita! As for mmm. I havent seen anything that I thought was offensive really. Where is Ball? I haven’t seen him since I came back on the site. I find it hard to believe if one doesnt like what they see they would encourage others to ignore them. Isn’t that a bit childish? Just like if we don’t like our child’s personality, squeeze them into the box. If you do not like discussing the med issues, there are a lot of other topics on here if it is such a sensitive topic for you. Maybe the anti-med cultist would like a good arguement and maybe there is someone on the list that can prove to them that the drug method is perfectly safe and the best route to go. Maybe they can be convinced that treating the whole child is a waste of time, money and effort and all that is really important is making sure they get an A in math. I am in search of anything that would change my mind. I am not sure which post brought it up about the self esteem problem these kids generally face. It is not the pills giving the kids self esteem. Think about it. No pill does that.

GA Mom,

As an adult with LD/ADD who takes a combination of stimulants and antidepressants, I think you are missing some points. I knew someone who had a kid with ADD and had vowed that this child would not be placed on medication.

Even though I take meds, I totally respected that viewpoint as I know drugs are not the perfect solution. A few months later, the parent decided for the drugs because the kid was failing school. It had nothing to do with wanting the kid to get an A in a subject.

I am on an LD email list and the most common remark that parents make is they don’t care what grades their kids get as they just want them to be happy. I don’t doubt you when you say there are parents who will push for that A in Math even it means taking Ritalin but I feel that is a one sided view. No, the kid you are talking about shouldn’t be on drugs but that shouldn’t obscure the fact that there are kids with ADD who very well may need meds.

You’re also right, that drugs don’t give a person self esteem. Medications help you be receptive to making the changes in your life that increase your self esteem. Yeah, it would be nice if we could make those changes without meds but sometimes there just isn’t another choice.

I realize by taking meds, I am running the risk of shortening my life. So obviously, you will never hear from me that drugs are perfectly safe because frankly, I think the jury is out on that. But I would rather have a life with a higher quality than a longer one that would have been without hope.

Finally, I wanted to respond to what you said about people objecting to the antimed posts. I like a good debate and I definitely don’t mind people disagreeing with me if it is done with respect. But when it is done with flaming, malintent, sarcasm, and misrepresentation of facts, I have a problem with that.

On the email list I belong to, several of these posts would not see the light of day because of their inflamatory nature. It has nothing to do with their position and everything to do with the way it is worded.

Oh one more thing - You seem to be inferring in your post that treating the whole person and putting someone on drugs are mutually exclusive and they are not if the ADD Treatment program is a good one. I do admit there are situations where medication is thrown at a patient and nothing else is done and that is not good.

Enough of my two cents.

PT

Dear PT, I am really confused on what I said to any of you that was sarcastic. Anything I said with attitude was directed solely to the individuals who stated to ignore other posters. I read all the boards and I only found 1 or 2 posts that were evidently from children. If I said anything to be offensive to anyones chioces I didn’t mean to. If a poster asks for info linking to dangers of meds, and I send them something, dont slam me. If posters ask for links to alternative therapies and I send some I am totally accused of being some kind of business rep from that company. duh? That is totally hipocritical. The only people that should be offended by anything I have said are the parents that are totally gullable and don’t read, don’t try, just complain and complain that they don’t know what else to do. Don’t say ALL people here have based their decisions on pure facts that were given to them. It is evident those are the ones offended. What about the poster that said “anti adhd-med users cultist blah blah blah. I know I am not anti ADHD med drug anything. If I need to take a drug I will. When a poster asks whats the dangers of drugs and I send a post, why hate the messenger. If you parents had already been reading this stuff, then I would say, yes you made an educated decision. But it is evident that you soley want support for drugging the kids. I am sorry if I don’t support you if you have done that with knowing all the facts. That is you decision. Not mine. If the posters do not want to know maybe they shouldn’t ask. How can that be offensive? Name one thing I said that was offensive to you in particular.

PT, If my child hung from ceiling fans, killed and played with dead animals, hurt himself maliously, tried to hurt me or his family, set fires, ect. ect. I would be at the nearest Doctors office begging for help not only drugs for him but for myself as well. Most of these ADHD symptoms do not warrant running out and getting pills for. Most of the crap that they are being diagnosed with is called childhood. Think about when we were kids and every time you get into the car, our parents would say, Johnny don’t hit your sister, Mary don’t look at your brother, Billy stop! I’m going to pull this car over! Guess What? The very next day, get into the car and go the same thing. Nowadays, that is being thrown into the loop of getting a label. I my intention to warn the parents and make them have a little slower reaction to medicating when not neccessary then good. If not, then just ignore me. I will never know. By the way, there are kids who did become depressed from meds even to the point of suicide. My son. My 10 yr old is a VERY happy individual with his own personality that at his ripe age ask me to except him as he is. He makes A and Bs and that is not even my point. I love him just the way he is and I would never want to change him. Low self esteem is a learned behavior from all the teachers and parents saying they are not good enough. Low self esteem is from teachers putting the kid in the corner or moving them away from other kids teaching them that they are different. Positive reenforcement and laughter is the best medicine of all time.

GA Mom,

I agree that Ritalin is prescribed when it shouldn’t be and I mentioned that in my previous post. What I was responding to from your previous post was when you said that parents want it prescribed so their kid will get an A in Math and I was trying to point out that not all parents were like that and it had been my experience that they decided on the medication option very reluctantly after trying everything else.

Frankly, I feel that ADD is overdiagnosed and underdiagnosed at the same time. So that’s why I feel you have a valid point in what you say GA Mom but so the other folks on this board.

You also said in the post I was responding to that if people didn’t like the anti med posts, perhaps they were a little too sensitive and needed to ignore them. When I said it was more of a case of people flaming, I was thinking of one person(s) in particular. My apologies if I came across as directing it at you as that was not my intention.

Before anyone starts suggesting that I am calling a post flaming just because I disagree with it, I suggest you look up what the word actually means. By the way, even subtle words that alot of us wouldn’t think of as flaming are. I learned that the hard way. (GA Mom, that is a general comment and not directed at you)

It sounds like we’re more in agreement than you might think GA Mom as I am happy to hear about your attitude regarding taking meds if your kid set himself on fire. You’re right, some things that wouldn’t have been given another thought when we were kids are now medicated for. But again, that shouldn’t obscure the fact that there are situations where meds are justified.

Anyway, I thank you for discussing the issues fairly even though we’re approaching the issue from opposite angles. This is exactly what I am talking about when I say I don’t mind when someone disagrees with me as long as the tone is respectful.

PT

You sometimes are rude yourself but in a subtle way. Flaming keeps the board alive and interesting. I do agree with you on alot of what you stated in previous posts, but you have to realize alot of parents are misinformed about the meds and think it is a miracle drug, thus thinking “oh we will try it for a short time and see the results”, just to keep the child on the meds strictly because they dont have to deal with the child as much, i’ve seen this first hand and thats what makes me not like the idea. Hopefully that helps you to reevaluate my position and helps you realize i am for doing whats best for the child(ren) and not the parent. Now with that said, understand I am not being flaming.