Driving

Hey Cindy!
I have that problem too. I don’t drive due to my disability. As best I understand what my disabilty was called- “Slow Motor Control”….basically means that when it comes to hands on, and learning hands on things- driving included- means that I’m slow in terms of learning it, and doing it!(but, am really good with reading, and book learning!) So, with that in mind, I KNOW that it’s not safe for me to be behind the wheel of a car. (LOL and I have TRIED to drive! Last time I did, I rear ended Dad’s old car…Luckily didn’t do any damage- thank God!)..I’d say if you’re concerned due to your disability, I’d listen to that gut instinct.It won’t lead you wrong.
Nita

Thank you for the advice, I really appreciate it. That is the trouble I have been listening to that gut instinct. Some people do not see it that way, more like a lack of not trying. They keep saying someday you might have to drive

My answer is always, I would rather walk than cause an accident. I got kicked out of a jobtraining rehab program because I would not drive to the office.

Cindy,

I have great respect for your decision. I hope you can find a suitable alternative to driving.

Have you considered meds.? It isn’t just for kids, many people find they continue with ADHD/ADD meds their entire life. It’s a trade off but might be helpful if you find driving a necessity.

I’ve had that thrown at me too, Cindy. I just ask them, “Would you rather me behind the wheel and endanger myself and others JUST to please you?” I haven’t been kicked out of any re hab programs due to not driving…As for those that don’t understand, just lay the facts out on the table, explain your disability, and why and HOW it makes it a danger for you to drive- then after that if they don’t understand- then they’re the ones that are having the problem and need to get over it..yes, there are alternatives to driving- Taking the City Bus where you need to go while the busses are running, Taxi Cabs…friends that understand the situation and have offered…there ARE ways to get around it!
Good luck!
Nita

LOL…well, you’ve got more guts than I do…Although, I have gotten behind the wheel to pull Dad’s car further in the driveway, and under the car port a few times! LOL…No futher than the driveway…don’t have the guts to go any further!
Nita

I haven’t learned to drive because my reflexes are slow and I have difficulty dealing with traffic when I cross streets. I live in the city so can’t imagine having to navigate the kind of traffic situations I’d have to deal with if I drove.

Sometimes, I wish I could move, but I don’t think I could drive even in a small town and not driving in that kind of situation would be much harder than living where I do where public transportation is available.

It feels so unfar to not be able to drive. I feel like I miss a lot. Yet, I really don’t believe that I’m capable of driving safely.

I’ve had a tendency to walk into people. I don’t judge distances well. Walking into someone or stepping on someone’s foot is not a good thing, but doing something similar with a car could be deadly.

Yet I mourn one more thing that I can’t do that I wish I could. It really limits a lot. Lately, my limitations have really bothered me. I want to do what most people can, but if I do something like try to drive, the results could be disastrous.

It’s not fair, but it’s the way it is. Like it or not.

I do not judge distance very well either. I was thinking about buying a bike, but might be afraid to get into the traffic. Sometimes my spatial orientation is off and I bump into things. If I did not laugh about it, I would probably cry. My spatial orientation improved greatly after I went through the Davis program. Having a point to focus on is a great improvement. I also learned to accept being dyslexic, I am still working on the part where it is a gift.

I was just going to add that I have a sister who has lived in Chicago for over 15 years—since graduating from college. She does not own a car and never drives, although she learned as a teenager. For her, it is an economic choice. She noticed many years ago that her friends with cars never had money. She chooses to live near public transportation so it isn’t an issue. I learned a long time ago when she says something is close, she means less than two miles!!! She is almost 40 and still has the figure of a college student because she walks so much.

She is not LD so she doesn’t face the issues you do. But there are many very happy people who do not drive at all.

Beth

I had a professor in graduate school in New Orleans who didn’t own a car. He took taxis and asked for rides from people. Parking was too expensive where he lived and he worked nearby so he could walk to work.

If you want to learn to drive - don’t give up. Take professional lessons. I had all the same fears and difficulty with filtering out other cars, noises, etc.
I didn’t learn to drive until I was in my thirties. I failed my first test.

When I finally did get my license, I had to tell my son not to talk to me, and I had sweaty palms and would shake while driving. I took it slowly, and gradually my anxiety subsided. Now, almost 10 years later, I am a great driver and very happy I persisited. I do have ADD, and find long drives of more than two hours are difficult for me. Good luck!

Glad to know I’m not alone with this whole not-driving thing; as an ADDer myself, I find driving more than a bit overwhelming. There are numerous distractions both within and outside the car (and even within my own mind!) that must be avoided, my reflexes don’t seem to be nearly fast enough for the immediate situations that crop up on the road, and on top of that, my spatial sense isn’t all too great either. I can drive for about 30 minutes at the most without any problems, but soon after that I start getting distracted even *on* medications (and obviously, distraction is not a good thing on the road!). And it doesn’t help that I also get extremely nervous and fidgety within the car, that I can’t judge how fast the car is going without repeatedly looking down at the speedometer, that I frequently swerve in and out of the lane because I can’t tell where the center of the lane actually *is*…

Sigh. People really don’t understand how frustrating and how difficult driving can be for those of us with ADD or LD. I wish there were a better way to explain it to them.

I also wish there was a better bus system where I lived. At least I’ve got enough friends who can drive me somewhere if I really need it, but for me, that’s not enough. I want the freedom to go to a job on my own, to go shopping for things whenever I need them (and not just whenever it’s convenient to get a ride). And maybe one of these days I will actually feel comfortable enough to let myself do so. I’m just not ready yet…

I have ADD and a LD. I am 17 years old and a good driver. I would suggest that if you want to drive take a few lessons of Driver’s Training. The teacher has breaks on his side of the car in case something happens. I sometimes worry about driving because of my ADD but 90% of the time I’m fine and drive as safely as possible. The best thing to do is to drive EVERY DAY when you are learning. That will only make you a better driver. I also find that music helps me to filter out distractions. Complete silence makes me nervous! I don’t blast the music though, I only play it quietly so I can still concentrate on the road. Once you have been driving for a reasonable amount of time (I started driving when I was 16) it is just like riding a bike. You don’t really think about what to do. You just do it. Good luck!