Hi. I have a gifted/nld son that also has generalized anxiety disorder and childhood depression. We have an upcoming IEP meeting and wanted to bounce some of my ideas off of special educators.
1. Can emotional issues be addressed specifically with IEP goals? For example, he won’t ask questions if he doesn’t understand something. On his last report card the teacher remarks stated he doesn’t show effort. Also, the following behaviors were reported as “no’s”:
demonstrates and maintains a desire to learn
uses self control
listens attentively and follows directions
organizes materials and possessions
assumes responsability for classwork
respects authority (he will only respect authority when the respect is earned)
participates in class activities
respects rights and feelings of others
resolves conflicts appropriately
He also does not advocate for himself. He repeatedly says he is afraid to talk to teachers (even though they have been very supportive).
I know most of these behaviors are a result of his anxiety.
2. He is an under achiever even though gifted. He often looks for ways to gain control. Would it be too much for me to ask for weekly meetings with the teacher to outline goals for week, what assignments need to be done etc.
3. How can the school and I help him to work to his potential? The reasons he doesn’t stem from emotional issues.
Currently, he has accomodations for the ld and is allowed to stop working and find a quiet place to regroup if he is feeling overwhelmed. He often doesn’t use this because he doesn’t want to tell the teacher he is feeling anxious. Instead, will engage in behavior that gets him sent to the office. He regroups and returns to class.
Any ideas or suggestions? Your help is appreciated.
Jean
Boy, you could be writing about my son!
We also have on-going problems with teachers misinterpreting the things he says and does. (much moreso than social skills problems with peers) Like your son, he seems completely incapable of advocating for himself, or even asking for help in a way that he actually receives it. He’s much more likely to aggravate the teacher into NOT helping by asking at an inappropriate time or in an inappropriate way!
The good news is that if your son is on an IEP, you definitely CAN write specific goals for both pragmatics/social skills AND emotional issues. I’m not sure that all of these problems are anxiety related, although anxiety certainly makes them worse)… I know a lot of the miscommunications with teachers really are pragmatics issues with my son, and I suspect that this may be true for your son as well.
My son takes part in a social skills “lunch bunch” that is considered “regular ed” so is not specifically listed on his IEP. But he also spends 30 minute weekly with the school psychologist, and that IS included in his formal IEP.
If it would help, feel free to contact me via e-mail, and I’ll give you the exact wording we have in our IEP. It sounds like it would need to be modified somewhat to meet your son’s needs, but it would give you a starting place.
Karen