Hi. My 5 1/2-year-old son is in a SPED 1st grade classroom, 8 kids total, for ADHD and behavioral/adjustment issues. He has lately been refusing to do the classwork unless someone is working with him one-on-one. His teacher has told me that if she’s working with him one-on-one, he’s fine, but if another student has a question and she leaves him, he starts immediately saying, “I can’t do it! I need help” loudly.
The issue is, he can do the work. In fact, they’re starting off the year with easy work that he is more than capable to doing. I can get him to do work at home, even advanced work, with a lot of redirection. But once redirected, he works mostly independently.
My son tells me the schoolwork is not that hard, but he only wants to do easy work. I think he may be bored, but I’m not sure. The teacher is reluctant to give him anything more advanced because he seldom will show her that he can do the easy stuff. Aftercare has no problem getting him to do his homework.
I have to admit I’m frustrated, because this is supposed to be SPED, with a small classroom size, and not only is he less willing to work there than when he was in regular ed K, but he and the others in his class seem to always be in conflict. Teasing, name-calling, pushing, hitting, arguing. I am afraid he’s picking up more inappropriate behaviors. So far, he’s been pushed down twice, resulting in a bump on the head and scars on an elbow. He has lashed out too, but hasn’t produced any bumps or bruises from what I’ve heard. I expressed concern about a child on the school bus who kept telling my son he’d kill him. The boy is separated from the other riders, but now the bus driver is saying my son is calling other kids names for no reason. Yes, that’s wrong. But why is it just now being brought to my attention when I complain?
The school psychologist is working with my son and is optimistic, but much of the work is trying to reason with him. That’s okay, and I do that myself, but I was told that with children with executive function issues, reasoning with them doesn’t help. Is that true?
I am concerned about my son’s safety in this school and wonder if it is the right program for him. Any thoughts? Thanks!
Re: Son is refusing to do classwork -- need advice
Here is an explanation of executive function, taken from the tourettesyndrome.com website:
“Executive functions are the higher-order processes that enable us to plan, sequence, initiate, and sustain our behavior towards some goal, incorporating feedback and making adjustments along the way. Some of the neurobehavioral conditions discussed on this web site such as Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, and Depression have been associated with Executive Dysfunction, but it is ADHD that is most freqently associated with the problems described in this section. ”
Personally, I describe it as being able to control oneself in terms of behavior, or good impulse control.
The school psychologist uses reason like this: “Just because someone talks about your mother doesn’t make it so.” That day, the students were teasing by talking about his mother. Also, he has told my son that his classmates pick with each other to see each other go into timeout, b/c that’s entertainment for them. All this is true, but the ability to control impulses and regulate their own behavior is not there, b/c of the disorders, so reasoning has to be accompanied by other things.
i want to know what excutive kid means? and what is you doing with him exactly when you say reasoning does not work with him?