teacher looking for advice

Hi,

I am not a teacher just a mom of a 10 yr. old ld great kid who works very hard. I am recently seeing him feel a lack of challenge at school.

The kids you are working with probably long before you entered the picture got the message of the no fail policy. They also probably had teachers that didn’t knock themselves out to inspire the kids.

Keep sending the message that you truly care about their future. Let them know you really want to help not punish them.

Good luck.

You raise many interesting questions. One would be - does punitive ever work well? Do our prisons - which are certainly punitive - solve our society’s problems? Once punished, twice shy? You’re clearly hesitant about that and I would share your hesitation.

I find the real reason that students don’t do homework (especially when talking about ld kids ) is they can’t - not won’t. Many students, LD or not, simply do not have the work space to do work at home. Some care for younger brothers and sisters. Others have unstructured home lives about which they, as teenagers, can do nothing. The assignment of homework in these modern times is a practice that denies the sad state many students live in, emotionally and literally. When we examine the tasks that are assigned to students, and attempt them ourselves, we often see how much time it would really take to complete the tasks and how mindless many of them are.

After school detentions do little to prevent failure. Students - especially LD students - need one on one support to get their homework done. Rarely do after school detentions provide such support. And unless you can provide that support for your students, they go without and their homework goes undone.

As to your points about life and IEPs, I don’t agree. In life we have many choices of jobs. We are not robots or border collies with tasks set before us. As an ADD adult, I choose to be a teacher. I have a job which allows me to change gears every 40 minutes. It gives me a free period here and there. I would do poorly cutting diamonds or defusing bombs. I don’t have the attention span for that but mine works well for the job I have. My dyslexic husband speaks his dictation into a tape recorder his secretary typed up - with correct spelling - his last published book. He has the choice of using that secretary.

In school, it’s pretty much one size fits all. All students are given the same task. In life rarely are we given the same task. We have much greater power to choose our tasks.

And why do we have schools if we want these students in life? School is supposed to be a place to prepare for life. If you want it to be life, close our schools down and turn the children loose. “Pretend life” makes no sense. It’s either real or it’s not. I disagree that you can pretend school is life and prepare children for life in the environment that is a school.

I see a teacher’s job as helping, not punishing. How are you helping these students? Some children are ready to become independent learners before others? If these children have learning differences, they need support for longer than do other students. And when in college and/or life, they are offered support by their government through the Americans With Disabilities Act. For those with learning differences, the ADA does provide an IEP.

I would also suggest building strong relationships with students. Candy and stickers do not work with older students and they debase any age student. If you develop a strong sense of community in your resource room, they will work to support that community.

So long as the tasks asked of them are realistic and fair. Often in school with LD kids they’re not. It’s also true that some students blossom when school is over and done with. Many great people have been unsuccessful in the regimented environment that is a school but thrived in real life.

I highly recommend Mel Levine’s Book Educational Care. It likens a teacher to a doctor and offers treatment strategies for various learning differences. I also like the professionalism the book encourages of us as teachers. Good doctors do not dismiss patients nor punish them. They care for them through their lives always seeking the better treatment, the better prescription.

Which was the tone of your post. You might like the book.

Good luck.

My dilemma this year has been how “punitive” I should be when my Jr.High students choose not to do their homework for their general ed. classes. I have colleagues who say that they will not let a student fail; and assign after-school detentions when a student fails to do his work. One thing my time away from education taught me- for most people there is no such thing as an IEP. Success or failure in life depends on our choices- our efforts, our hard work.
There are no “accomodations, modifications, or adaptations” for life- we do the work set before us or we fail!
Several of my students are currrenly choosing to fail- despite encouragement, and assistance during their school day- they are choosing not to complete homework assignments, or other school work once they leave the building. Some are even refusing to take notes, etc. during class. This is not an ability issue. These students are fully capable of doing the work- they are just choosing not to. For the most part they all have parents who care deeply for them. Their parents and I are struggling to help them see how their lack of serious efforts in school will lead to failure in life.
I am seeking advice from others who are finding the ways to get kids on track academically and help them become independent learners. My heart tells me that assigning after-school detentions is punitive and does not work in the long run; but I am at a loss to find things that do. I also don’t believe in rewarding a student for doing the things expected of him. When was the last time anyone got a reward for just doing their job? How often does that happen in real life? Beside, my students are too old for stickers and candy. I want to develop life-long skills in my kids- anyone with suggestions? Thanks.

I absolutely agree with Marion. Kids know when we give up on them and just pass them along. Teenagers naturally become somewhat lax and when there are learning or emotional issues we should be tightening the reigns and increasing our guidance instead of just giving in or punishing. They need to be taught and motivated more now than ever. It’s obvious that that basic skills and life lessons have not yet made an impression on these teens from the lower grade levels. Let’s do it now!

Hello, I speak as a parent of a boy who is 13. I homeschool him now , his teachers said the same thing about him. He is very bright, but he has limitted reading and writing skills, he is labled L.D. add/ adhd dialaxic ect.

I feel that by this age these kids have been broken by their peers and their lack of sucess. They feel that they have missed the mark , and they have lost the race so why keep running. I feel that the answer is finding an intrest of theirs and build on it. This has helped my son ! He now has some pride about what he can do!! Not what he cant do. These kids beat themselves up with their thoughts and fears of more failure. What seems to be refuseal to try is realy the fear of just failing again , even though they put their heart into it!!!! I know this well. After many years of watching my son and his struggles. The little failures seem to get bigger and bigger . When you don’t feel good about yourself , it’s hard to care about anything eles. It’s hard hard to imagine the future when just getting through one day is such a strugle.They all have dreams but their fear of failure is holding them back. My son has many dreams of being a police officer, a capton of his own ship ect. But we both know you must read before you can do these jobs. That is something that we are still working on.
When I come to him with a book and he tries to read with all he has in him and it just dosn’t happen like he want’s !!! I can’t explain how he feels but I know the look on his face that I see so often.
You are doing a great job ! You care for your studens and that is rear in many schools. I hope my post helps you see theis side. I know there is no right answer , but you are right, life makes no excuses for people, you sink or swim! I want my son and others to get it the best way they can, and be proud of who they are!
Have a great day!!!

After school study hall is “punitive” to the student — but it is punitive in a way that gets the work done.

I taught in a secondary school for students with LDs. Many of them came with really bad habits and/or attitudes, just as you describe. The school has a standard policy — if you don’t have your homework, you stay after school and do it. Even though the students feel punished, the purpose is anything but punitive — it’s to keep the student from getting behind and give him the help he needs. Half an hour is required (so the student doesn’t just rush through), or the kiddo can stay ‘til 5:00 (about 90 minutes) if that’s how long it takes. There’s a teacher there to help (teachers rotate & have ASSH duty about twice a month) though sometimes the assigning teacher will work with the kiddo instead.

Basically, it works. The kids are expected to do the work; if it’s an unreasonable assignment we deal with that, usually with support like dictating answers (but since it’s a school for LD kids, the assignments are highly likely to be highly appropriate). Some students are in ASSH all the time and they’re likely not to return the next year — though some are there because the home situation isn’t a good place for getting the work done, so it’s quicker and easier to do it there.

Having it basically non-negotiable saves tons of arguments. (They still try, and sometimes succeed, when there’s some critical appointment, etc.) It’s not a power play, an attempt to dominate the student; it’s a real concern for the student’s education and that’s what you’re there for. It sometimes takes a few times for the students to figure that out — but rather often, they do.

My son, who is a 5th grader headed for middle school next year, goes to “Homework Club” with a SPED teacher 3 days a week. We’ve done this all year, and it has been a tremendous help. He does have supportive parents and a good place to work at home, but there are two problems. Sometimes he needs more help with homework than he will accept from us without getting into power struggles, and we have decided (and the school supports our decision) that it is more important for us to be his parents and emotional support system than teachers or “homework police”.

Second, his battery seems to run dry on the way home in the bus. It is very hard to get him geared up and working again at home, but whilehe’s still at school, he seems to be able to keep moving. Obviously he still has homework that needs to be done at home too, but “Homework Club” has been a huge stress reducer for us. He thought he’d hate it at the beginning of the year, but even he has come to realize that it is well worth the extra 40 mintes he spends at school to come home with the “hard stuff” done. On light days, he sometimes gets it all done there, and those days feel like a vaction when he gets home!

Karen

It’s really important that the goal of helping hte student learn and not get behind be the driving force behind it — and that other behaviors are consistent with that goal. I’m curious — are the assignments modified and/or are they appropriate? Often “regular” assignments are a real overdose of language for an LD kiddo who may be very bright, but has to sacrifice understanding in order to plow through the raw amount of verbiage in any given content area.

Sue said everything I was thinking. Life doesn’t have modifications and adaptions, but it doesn’t require you to do things beyond your capabilities (sp) either, or are you ever required to use some of the things they teach in school. I know that schools are required to teach science and history…but I’d so much rather my son learn to read and write. I can’t imagne him ever having a job where he will have to know who the 13th president of the United States is, but he will have to read.
And he’ll never have to name the process of the food chain, but he will need to be able to spell the name of the street he lives on.
As far as the after school detention to complete homework, if there is someone there to help, that’s great, if not…then it’s just punishment, an extension of an already miserable day.
I know with my son, if I didn’t help with homework, he couldn’t complete most of it, and some kids don’t have that support system
My advice to a teacher would be, be their friend, give them the benefit of the doubt, most of these kids are probably so beat down by the system, they don’t care anymore. And, who can blame them, if you try and fail, why keep trying?

I have not read any responses to your letter. I have no idea if they are responses of understanding and support or maybe a little like I am right now, hurt. I am a mother of a 15 year son whom currently is medicated for ADD. He is a very nice young man, and has never been a behavior problem to me or the public school he attends. His manners are great and he has a wonderful sense of humor. All these wonderful character traits but still he is earning an F in all five of his classes. He is Special Ed. student and recieves 10% of his day with that program. For over the last six years of his education I have stood at many meetings looking at these educators with the same dombfounded look I had when reading your letter. How misundertanding can a person be? Do you think for one minute he would love to pretend as you do, that these so called minor flaws, can be puton a shelf and stick your chin up and go face the world, would just leave him. Daily he struggles with brain cells that are not functioning right, that cause him to look retarded in the eyes of his peers. If you think for a second those peers don’t tease, look at the violence today in our schools. His self image is shredded by the time he enters the front door. His teachers, they are on overload, they have as many excuses as the students do when they forget their work. The fortunate ones without a LD, such as ourselves, barely make it through a single day without going crazy, we seek professional help to sort out our thoughts and feeling, lucky for us we can express them, they can’t, we pop our pills to calm our nerves, we drink and smoke to stop the shaking, we do what we have to in order to get by, and some of us think they can sit and judge another by making assumptions that “in the real world there are no modification, like crap their ain’t. If your an educator today, your job is modified. Be true to yourself, what if I was to ask for a taping of your daily lectures for my son to review each night? I to work in a classroom, and the job might be tiresome, but we are overloaded with modification! My son would love to beleive he can face adulthood like his friends will, but this character flaw you seem to belittle, is such a mountain for him. I have spent many days talking to teachers about programs or assistance or any ideas, whatever, to help my son be successful and hold his own, but all I found was teachers like yourself that view it as a burden to your program, and downsize it’s abilities. For one little hour, I iwsh this disorder on you, maybe then you will have some insight to what these students are suffering with. There are many of LD students that have behavior problems. This is understandable, with the humiliation they sustain daily, but there are also ones like my son, that gives his all, and still fails every course. To take his graduation day away because of not having the credits to walk with his peers, is just shameful. They deserve some slack from society, not excused, but slack. Yes they do need to learn responibility as well as to know the real world don’t offer IEP programs, and if our states made people like you learn to teach them correctly, at their levels, and their abilities, then they wouldn’t need any hand outs. Seems like maybe you could be spending your time search the internet for ways to build up these kids, instead of being part of the group that tears them down. Your poor students. As your message was your opinion, so this be mine.