A teacher once told me that they thought that my son could be spending more time at home with his school work. Yes this is true he should be spending more time. But let’s look at the whole picture . the picture that the teachers don’t see. As a parent I have to make many adjustments in my childs life . Adjustments not only for his academic benifits but also for his happieness and well being. I have to make sure that my son is happy within hisself, I have to make sure that he dose not get involved with drugs and the wroung croud. I have to make sure he dose not get withdrawn and depressed. I have to make sure that he is Happy. I have to make sure that he will not think about taking his own life because of to much pressure. This is the side of raising a LD child that the Teachers do not see. When my son gets home from school he want’s to leave school behind him and continue on with the part of his day that is stress free, the part of his day that he can be himself without someone always showing him his mistakes and trying to get him to learn things that are hard for him. Although doing extra reading and work at home would help my child academically I have to realise that to much accademic stress could take whatever true personality and happiness my child had left after having to submitt to a school system that is not fully excepting with diverse students. Once my child is out of school he will go on to live a full life despite of the pitfalls with the system. My job is to gethim through the next four years of school with a positive and healthy mindset. And this is the whole picture.
Re: the whole picture
So well said. Teachers, although well meaning, have no idea what’s it like to prioritize for ld child. It is unbelievably challenging.
teacher's side of the story
i think we as parents need to do more explaining to teachers about what life is like at home and that might get us a bit more empathy and understanding. it means sucking it up a bit on my part to admit the difficulties but gives them a new viewpoint. sure has worked with my boy’s teachers.
also, a lot of teacher bashing goes on here. as a teacher i find it tough to take. yes, i know there are bad apples out there but i think we need to have more trust that for the most part they are doing the best they can with what they have. if their situations are anything like ours, they are pushed and pulled to the limits and then some. most of them have absolutely no training to work with ld kids and no first hand understanding. just think how overloaded you were to try and figure out how to help your kid! i am special ed trained and a teacher for 17 years and i was over-whelmed. now put that to a teacher with a big class and 3-5 kids all with different needs, add to that the children that need enrichment, add to that the kids with behavior difficulties from adhd or another disorder or a difficult home life. yes- i want the best for my son but i also want the best for my 30 students and No, i can’t do it all.
again, there are bad apples but maybe if you can look at some of your teachers from a slightly different viewpoint, you will have a bit of empathy for them and then you can all muddle through helping your child together!!
thanks for listening to me rant.
i hope this doesn’t turn into a link to say, “Yeah but, my kids’ teacher does this….” that isn’t going to help anyone. we need to look at our own situations and try to find a way to make them more positive.
charlene
Re: teacher's side of the story
Mary:
I agree with you, when my son gets home he needs to do things which make him feel successful, he spends all day at school feeling unsuccessful. Homework is a battle everynight. When spend every evening trying to rebuild some self esteem, but then the next day he goes back to school and there is goes again.
If only those teachers could try and see my son’s positive sides, or even if they could look for them. But all they see is the negative.
Re: teacher's side of the story
I am an ld mom and former nurse. So many people come up to me and tell me their nurse horror stories. Nurses like teachers are caring people trapped in a system that often just does not work.
They want to do a good job but often can’t.
I have worked hard to understand my childs learning deficits. I have had to fight “the system” to get what he needs. It is frustrating.
I had to do alot of it myself. I bought the book reading reflex and taught him to read using the phonographix method. I researched all the possible reading methods and found this program to be the most supported based on actual scientific studies. We worked hard all summer last year. When he started second grade this child who couldn’t read a word was reading very close to grade level. At the end of second grade he can read above grade level.
I fought to have him receive OT. I had to go the the state superintendant of special Ed to make it happen but I made it happen.
Next week he goes to a behavioral optometrist for an evaluation. I am also considering interactive metronome (another area where the scientific research seems extremely encouraging)
So no going out to dinner for several months to pay for all this.
The bottom line is that you should never feel helpless. Never give someone or something (the school system) the power to make you feel helpless. You have the power. You know your child best. You are the best person to help them achieve their personal greatness.
I figure anyone who made it here can do this. Drag your teachers, administrators, school psychiatrists, occupational therapists on to your side. Make them fight this dreaded LD with you.
Don’t put them over there on the other side where you both will feel helpless.
Complaining is not fighting. Searching for answers is fighting. Insisting the right actions are taken is fighting. Working you buts off to make it happen is fighting.
Sorry for the tirade. I just want to see all these amazing kids succeed.
Re: teacher's side of the story
I have had the experience with my LD daughter’s teachers that once they realize what I’m after (my child’s success) they find ways to support you. I don’t have ANY teacher complaints, only much gratitude.
I have done a ton of reading on LD kids
and I have come to the conclusion that
kids with a strong parent in their corner
will survive school and usually go on to
do very well. Kind of like being forged
in the fire.
It’s still not fair and it is still exhausting
as heck but stay strong ;-)