drug addicted child, PLEASE HELP

: This is an incredible challenge and one of the most significant that I’ve ever heard of teacher facing in my many years of teaching. Anyone should understand a teacher becoming frustrated.What is wonderfully remarkable, though, is that you’re not. You’re only wondering about how to better help this child. If all teachers were like you, the world would be a better place.If it were me, I would direct some very specific questions to this child’s doctor (or to any doctor) to gain some understanding of how long this might go on. I have sadly heard of infants born addicted to cocaine but for how long after birth does the addiction last? I have heard of cocaine addicted infants needing constant rocking, especially at 2 1/2 to 3 hour intervals just as you describe but can an addiction really last three years? Or was this poor child actually being given cocaine after birth?How long has she been with her adoptive mother? That question should be easily answered by the mother but this doctor, or some other, should be able to tell you how long these withdrawal symptoms will last. At some point, the body does lose its addiction to this substance and all others, if deprived of the substance long enough.I should also think there would medications to help this child through those periods. Cocaine is a herion derivitive and many herion addicts are treated with methedone to help them break their addiction in less painful ways than this poor child is experiencing.Knowing when this might be over would give you light at the end of the tunnel. If you find this doctor inaccessible, e-mail me and I’ll pose the questions to those doctors I know.In the meantime, I wouldn’t think ignoring such behavior would be helpful. A child addicted at the age of three will not be scared by the normal threats we offer children such as sitting at a different table at snack time. The language is the last issue I’d address but work first on the hitting and bitting. I would physically restrain such a child as any three year old can be restrained. I wouldn’t hesitate to catch her arm as she swings or firmly close her mouth when she opens it to bite. If she has time to move papers before she urinates, you should take the time to take her by her small arm and psysically propel her to the bathroom. I would not allow her to emerge from it until she has her clothes on again. But I would be very willing to help her dress when she shows her willingness to.The behaviors she has deserve not to be ignored but deserve consistent firm and very discouraging response. Do you have an aide at all? If you do, I’d let the aide teach the class and remove this child from it until her rage passes. If you don’t, I don’t see how this poor child can remain in your class until her addiction is resolved.I’ve taught every level from pre-school to college and I’ve long thought pre-school teachers are the best. Your interest in helping this poor child proves I’m right. Preschool teachers are the best.I am a preschool teacher in Schenectady, NY. I have a cocaine
: addicted three year old student. When she gets angry, she becomes
: disruptive, hateful, and destructive. She lashes out on her
: friends and teachers by biting, pinching, hitting, yelling
: inappropriate language. She will slap anyone across the face and
: feel no remorse or guilt, nothing scares her. When you ignore her
: behavior, she gets angrier and meaner and she continues to take
: her clothes off in front of everyone and will purposely urinate on
: the floor. I say purposely because before she does it, she will
: tell you what she is going to do and if there is paper on the
: floor, she will move it so that it doesn’t get wet. She can be a
: good girl except when she gets in her rages. Lately her rages are
: about 10am, 12:30pm and 3:15. They last about an half hour to
: forty five minutes. I have written numerous incident reports to
: her adoptive mom, mom took her to the doctors and said that the
: child will be very aggressive but that is because she is drug
: addicted. The doctor and mom gave me no solutions or strategies to
: help the child. I am so frustrated because this child takes up
: most of my day when I have thirteen other children to teach. It is
: very hard to maintain a classroom when one child is completely out
: of control. I don’t know what to do. I want to try to modify her
: behavior with different strategies. She does not have ADD/ADHD,
: she has a great attention span. Please help. Sharon

Is your school a public one or private? I ask this, because this child should certainly be in the child-find rolls for special ed. This will give mom and you access to consultants and services for her. You, she, and mom all need the support.For the short term- is there another adult working with you? If you know when this little munchkin is going to go off, and it sounds like it is fairly regular, until you can get a knowledgeable someone in there to help you figure out what is going on, you need to be able to get her out of the room and to a relatively private place until she has collected herself. Barring that, you need to be able to move the rest of your group. If the rages are under her conscious control, then lack of an audience is one of the more powerful tools for helping kids see the wisdom in calming down. If they are not something she can help- and this is probably more likely - then her safety and the safety of the other children in your program mandate that she be isolated in some way.I wouldn’t make this a punitive thing for her because it isn’t her faut after all- but it is punitive to the other students to have watch this everyday- and very unfair. Relative to other strategies, you need to know whether this behavior is involuntary first. If it is, then there are things that can be done. If not- well, that is harder, and you need someone knowledgeable there to help you.Recommend to Mom that the child be evaluated. Preschoolers are eligible for special education including evaluation. You local school district will help you and if they are balky- the parenting board at this site has lots of supportive folks who have done this. Good luck to you and mom and bless you both.Robin

If your school has a social worker, get her (or him) involved. I’m wondering if this child is getting counseling or medication, since you say her mother “took her to the doctors” but no helpful advice came from the meeting. It’s possible mom is relying on a medical professional who is not as well trained as someone who specializes in children with serious psychosocial disorders. This child may need a pediatric neurologist and/or a psychiatrist or some other specialist. The school social worker may be able to talk with the parents about the current treatment (if any) this child is getting, and may know of other professionals and other resources that can help the entire family. While you have been told the problems stem from “drug addiction” it is possible there are other things going on in the home. The social worker can determine whether or not a local agency needs to look further into the home situation. Are other children living in the home and at risk of being harmed by this child? Or is it possible other people in the home could be harming the child or abusing her in some way? A child who already shows no signs of remorse when harming others, and is as manipulative as this one sounds, needs aggressive intervention NOW. I’m having a hard time accepting the notion that this child should be allowed to continue in a regular classroom with no apparent treatment plan. This does not sound like appropriate placement. One other thing…be sure to let the social worker know about the times when you observe the worst behavior. Best wishes. JJ

: This is an incredible challenge and one of the most significant that I’ve ever heard of teacher facing in my many years of teaching. Anyone should understand a teacher becoming frustrated.What is wonderfully remarkable, though, is that you’re not. You’re only wondering about how to better help this child. If all teachers were like you, the world would be a better place.If it were me, I would direct some very specific questions to this child’s doctor (or to any doctor) to gain some understanding of how long this might go on. I have sadly heard of infants born addicted to cocaine but for how long after birth does the addiction last? I have heard of cocaine addicted infants needing constant rocking, especially at 2 1/2 to 3 hour intervals just as you describe but can an addiction really last three years? Or was this poor child actually being given cocaine after birth?How long has she been with her adoptive mother? That question should be easily answered by the mother but this doctor, or some other, should be able to tell you how long these withdrawal symptoms will last. At some point, the body does lose its addiction to this substance and all others, if deprived of the substance long enough.I should also think there would medications to help this child through those periods. Cocaine is a herion derivitive and many herion addicts are treated with methedone to help them break their addiction in less painful ways than this poor child is experiencing.Knowing when this might be over would give you light at the end of the tunnel. If you find this doctor inaccessible, e-mail me and I’ll pose the questions to those doctors I know.In the meantime, I wouldn’t think ignoring such behavior would be helpful. A child addicted at the age of three will not be scared by the normal threats we offer children such as sitting at a different table at snack time. The language is the last issue I’d address but work first on the hitting and bitting. I would physically restrain such a child as any three year old can be restrained. I wouldn’t hesitate to catch her arm as she swings or firmly close her mouth when she opens it to bite. If she has time to move papers before she urinates, you should take the time to take her by her small arm and psysically propel her to the bathroom. I would not allow her to emerge from it until she has her clothes on again. But I would be very willing to help her dress when she shows her willingness to.The behaviors she has deserve not to be ignored but deserve consistent firm and very discouraging response. Do you have an aide at all? If you do, I’d let the aide teach the class and remove this child from it until her rage passes. If you don’t, I don’t see how this poor child can remain in your class until her addiction is resolved.I’ve taught every level from pre-school to college and I’ve long thought pre-school teachers are the best. Your interest in helping this poor child proves I’m right. Preschool teachers are the best.I am a preschool teacher in Schenectady, NY. I have a cocaine
: addicted three year old student. When she gets angry, she becomes
: disruptive, hateful, and destructive. She lashes out on her
: friends and teachers by biting, pinching, hitting, yelling
: inappropriate language. She will slap anyone across the face and
: feel no remorse or guilt, nothing scares her. When you ignore her
: behavior, she gets angrier and meaner and she continues to take
: her clothes off in front of everyone and will purposely urinate on
: the floor. I say purposely because before she does it, she will
: tell you what she is going to do and if there is paper on the
: floor, she will move it so that it doesn’t get wet. She can be a
: good girl except when she gets in her rages. Lately her rages are
: about 10am, 12:30pm and 3:15. They last about an half hour to
: forty five minutes. I have written numerous incident reports to
: her adoptive mom, mom took her to the doctors and said that the
: child will be very aggressive but that is because she is drug
: addicted. The doctor and mom gave me no solutions or strategies to
: help the child. I am so frustrated because this child takes up
: most of my day when I have thirteen other children to teach. It is
: very hard to maintain a classroom when one child is completely out
: of control. I don’t know what to do. I want to try to modify her
: behavior with different strategies. She does not have ADD/ADHD,
: she has a great attention span. Please help. Sharon

Is your school a public one or private? I ask this, because this child should certainly be in the child-find rolls for special ed. This will give mom and you access to consultants and services for her. You, she, and mom all need the support.For the short term- is there another adult working with you? If you know when this little munchkin is going to go off, and it sounds like it is fairly regular, until you can get a knowledgeable someone in there to help you figure out what is going on, you need to be able to get her out of the room and to a relatively private place until she has collected herself. Barring that, you need to be able to move the rest of your group. If the rages are under her conscious control, then lack of an audience is one of the more powerful tools for helping kids see the wisdom in calming down. If they are not something she can help- and this is probably more likely - then her safety and the safety of the other children in your program mandate that she be isolated in some way.I wouldn’t make this a punitive thing for her because it isn’t her faut after all- but it is punitive to the other students to have watch this everyday- and very unfair. Relative to other strategies, you need to know whether this behavior is involuntary first. If it is, then there are things that can be done. If not- well, that is harder, and you need someone knowledgeable there to help you.Recommend to Mom that the child be evaluated. Preschoolers are eligible for special education including evaluation. You local school district will help you and if they are balky- the parenting board at this site has lots of supportive folks who have done this. Good luck to you and mom and bless you both.Robin

If your school has a social worker, get her (or him) involved. I’m wondering if this child is getting counseling or medication, since you say her mother “took her to the doctors” but no helpful advice came from the meeting. It’s possible mom is relying on a medical professional who is not as well trained as someone who specializes in children with serious psychosocial disorders. This child may need a pediatric neurologist and/or a psychiatrist or some other specialist. The school social worker may be able to talk with the parents about the current treatment (if any) this child is getting, and may know of other professionals and other resources that can help the entire family. While you have been told the problems stem from “drug addiction” it is possible there are other things going on in the home. The social worker can determine whether or not a local agency needs to look further into the home situation. Are other children living in the home and at risk of being harmed by this child? Or is it possible other people in the home could be harming the child or abusing her in some way? A child who already shows no signs of remorse when harming others, and is as manipulative as this one sounds, needs aggressive intervention NOW. I’m having a hard time accepting the notion that this child should be allowed to continue in a regular classroom with no apparent treatment plan. This does not sound like appropriate placement. One other thing…be sure to let the social worker know about the times when you observe the worst behavior. Best wishes. JJ