My 9 yr. old son is getting re-tested tomorrow after my insistance since he was put in sped at age 5 for delayed speech.
I know there have been dramatic improvements in him and he is so mature, helpful, compasionate, understanding, great at sports, cooperative. Just a great kid.
I insist that he is not being challenged enough in his class and that he will forever stay behind unless he is taught more. I have heard all the stuff about they don’t want kids to be frustrated da da da da da.
I am having him tutored and did last summer too for reading he is definately 2 yrs. behind but the tutors at least give him more interesting challenging material.
I just hope the test show that them he is a smart kid and should be given the opportunity to advance. I agree he still needs SLP and now he needs reading.
He still needs sped because they haven’t gotten him close enough to his own grade level.
I felt the same way about my child when I had him in special school. It is so great that YOU do not under-estimate your child’s abilities! Have you ever read the book, “Late-talking Children” by Thomas Sowell? His own son was a very late talker, and when his son graduated from MIT with his Masters in computer science with Honors, no doubt, Sowell wrote an article to the New York Times. He’s gathered stories of over 80 families with late-talkers and studied patterns among them. It is a very uplifting book. I look back on it whenever I get caught up in the current crisis. It reminds me that in the long-run my son will be just fine. He will find a profession that fits his gifts and temperment. He will find love and success. He will always have a Mom and Dad who love him. Now… if we can just survive 4th grade.
As for getting the school to challenge your son and not short-change or underestimate him? Sounds like you are doing exactly the right thing by getting him tested. Keep telling them stories about the things YOU see him do, that they may not have seen.
Hopefully the school will do more for your child. If not, can you insist that he is mainstreamed in to regular class for at least a trial period? Ask them to trust your motherly instincts too. A little frustration in the classroom might help him. Kids rise to the occassion! My son certainly has. He was very severely language delayed when he was young, plus other developmental delays too. He’s 10 now. He has learned more from his struggles than from being babied. We all do, don’t we? You just don’t want to get too overloaded at once. If he has other outlets to release his stress or boost his confidence, mainstreaming full-time more might be just what the doctor ordered.
Politely and gently question their motives for keeping him in a sped class. Are they more worried about his frustration level or the regular ed. teachers? To quote my 3 year old’s favorite book (Green Eggs and Ham), tell them to “Try it, Try it, and You’ll See.” I may be a lot easier to get him back into a sp.ed. class mid year, than into a regular ed. class.
I agree with you. I’d rather my son be in a class that challenges him, making Bs, Cs, and Ds with strong peer role models, than in a watered-down version of academics and a specially trained teacher. I use to believe that my son could not survive in a bigger class because he needed so much individual attention and a customized approach to learning. The reverse is true. My son does better in the regular size class. There is surprisingly less social pressure because he has more friends to choose from. He sticks with some of the shyer kids who don’t expect so much from him communication-wise. He sees that he is better in math than some of the kids who are smart at reading. He’s really learned to be a harder worker and be more mature. His teachers are not specially trained to understand his challenges. But, I find it is more important to have a teacher that is a good personality match for my son and who helps him to feel safe in the classroom. I can help her understand his quirks and special needs.
I accept that the primary load of responsibilty for teaching my son is on MY shoulders. I do a lot of pre-teaching at home to keep my son ahead of his classmates with certain subjects. We’ll read a chapter ahead so that he can participate more when the class gets there. We have a tutor, plus I tutor him with his homework. Admittedly, he does not have the same joy for school activities that he had when he was in a smaller, more creative, multi-sensory type learning environment. School is hard work. And he is just growing up. Kindergarten is just more fun than 3rd grade. I strive to keep his schedule and life as stress-free and normal as possible. He thinks every kid goes to OT and tutoring. We don’t want him to think of himself as someone with a disability. At some point soon, we may explain to him labels like ADD and dsylexia. But, I hope we can downplay it. Everyone has abilities and disabilities in some areas. His mom can’t play the guitar like he can.
If I have to…I’d rather send my son 1/2 day to school for the social benefits and home school using tutors to help me with his harder academics, like English. We’ll get him through the system and on to college. You will too. Good Luck. I hope this note gives you some positive vibes. You deserve them. It’s hard being a mom somedays.
Take care,
Rosie