school anxiety

I understand. My older son who is severely dyslexic was incredibly stressed about school. Kids are stressed when the environment is not appropriate for them. I can imagine the shock of your son after coming out of a wonderful environment like Waldorf to a public school and an ld type program. If we had Waldorf available to us, that’s were my kids would be going.

It would seem like your son needs additional accomodations to lessen the quantity and demands and focus on the quality and learning. My sons (9th and 3rd) have reduced quantity, no peer grading, no penalty for spelling or reversal errors, a reader for tests, a quiet environment for tests, a scribe when necessary, books at home, books on tape, word processing with dictation allowed, a daily organizing person to assist with assignments and proper books and materials, one step directions, written multi-step directions, class notes…etc. In other word, the proper assistance in order to learn and demonstrate their knowlege.

My older son (in 4th grade) used to say for about 6 months or more that he was going to kill himself over school. That’s when I got proactive, vocal and involved. Again…Waldorf seems like such a better way to go.

When did the school anxiety begin? At Waldorf or at his new school? And how long has it been going on?

Sometimes we treat children for the anxiety they’re displaying when we could be removing some of things that cause him anxiety. Is something happening in his school day that would cause his anxiety?

You say he is in 3rd grade but his reading skills are at a 1st grade level. That discrepancy alone could cause a bright child anxiety. Have you considered observing him quietly one day in school?

In the absence of the social worker, they yet may be things that can be done to help him with the anxiety.

My own son with reading issues displayed great anxiety in one year at school. No IEP can think to every minute of every school day and we found that there were many parts of the day when the situation called for him to be able to read something he could not.

Good luck.

Coming out of Waldorf school to a regular public school is a big shock to the system. Waldorf is so loving and nonthreatening. They see the whole child, not just the academic child. There would automatically be a big adjustment for any child, regardless of learning issues.

Third grade is tough if you’re struggling with reading. And 9 years old is classic for a child to suddenly start feeling awful about his or her abilities. Being a very bright fellow, your son probably feels most acutely the difference between his reading skills and that of his classmates.

My son was a poor reader too, reading on a 1st grade level while in 3rd grade. Third, fourth, and fifth grades were horrible for him whenever reading was involved. His reading finally improved enough by 6th grade to be able to start feeling OK about himself.

I agree that your son should have whatever accomodations in place that are necessary to take that anxiety off him. The suggestions given to you by the posters above are exactly what should be considered for your son.

I am responding to your response re Waldorf schools. They may seem like a perfect nurturing school but they can be very rigid in their ways. The reason I took my son out is because 1.) they do not recognize learning disabilities and
2.) They were not teaching him how to read although I think a large problem with that was the individual teacher. When he left 2nd grade Waldorf , he could read at the preschool level. Now in the public school in special ed for reading he is at the first grade reading level.

It’s true that Waldorf doesn’t teach reading per se till the age of about 9 years old. While I disagree with that decision, I’ve also become aware that their students are getting loads of pre-reading and pre-writing exercises, all of which are really good OT type work. All that attention to detail when it comes to blending colors and just how you move your arms, etc., and all the singing activities actually are great pre-reading skills. When kids do go on to read, most of them do quite well and learn very quickly. They catch up with their classmates at traditional schools in a matter of months and don’t seem, in the long run, to be harmed by the experience.

But you’re right about the kids who do have learning disabilities: they don’t really seem to recognize them at the early elementary level, at least not at the couple of schools I’ve had contact with. But much of the work they do would be good remedial work anyhow, although I do think they’re missing some steps along the way.

My son also has school anxiety.I have to walk him to his classroom everyday.The school frowns on this and thinks he can do it himself.He is 9 and in 3rd grade too,has learning disabilities,tourettes,ADHD.He finally told me in an appointment with his psychartrist why I have to walk him he said.Schoool is 6 hours long and I miss my mom and in those 6 hours something could happen and she makes me feel safe and I want to see her all that I can and I love her.

My daughter went to a Waldorf school. In the middle of 2nd grade, at age 8-1/2, she started coming home from school telling me she was stupid because the other kids could read and she couldn’t. I did some investigating and found out she was one of about 6 students in the 2nd grade who were reading at a preschool level. The other 20 students had picked up at least some reading skills, and a few (the “smart” kids, according to my daughter) were already into chapter books.

I started tutoring my daughter at home using the book “Reading Reflex”. Within 6 weeks she was decoding words at a 2nd grade level, and her self-esteem clearly benefited from this. She stopped telling me she was stupid. The other 5 students finished out the year as non-readers.

I would have been fine waiting until age 9 for my daughter to read. What many parents overlook, however, is that the children themselves may not be fine with it.

Also, it’s a big mistake to wait until age 9 to identify reading LD’s. My own dd, even though she learned enough in 6 weeks to “hold her own” in 2nd grade, was ultimately diagnosed with both severe developmental vision delays and severe phonological delays. We homeschooled all of her 3rd grade year in order to provide therapies and interventions (8 months of vision therapy, 3 months of PACE, and a Phono-Graphix intensive) to bring her reading ability in line with her intellectual gifts. These therapies would have involved much less remediation had they been started three years earlier.

Meanwhile, at least one of the 5 non-readers in dd’s class still has major reading problems and cries every morning before she goes to school (still Waldorf). I have not remained in contact with the school to find out how the other non-readers fared. However, I know that the year before we left, the school was providing pull-out remedial reading classes with a special tutor (although this was not advertised) for all of the upper grades — 3 through 8 — so my suspicion is that most of the non-readers in 2nd grade were still having problems later. It may be that non-LD kids pick up reading quickly at age 9, but that is *not* the case for LD kids. And Waldorf has no way of differentiating between LD and non-LD in reading.

My dd experienced great relief from anxiety when we started homeschooling, because many of the activities were not appropriate for her — e.g., the mandatory knitting, which was a frustrating experience for a right-eyed leftie with weak hand muscles (as diagnosed, along with other motor problems, in a later OT eval). Waldorf is great when it works, but I think the way the schools actually operate — as compared to what Rudolf Steiner had in mind when he started the movement — does a disservice to many children, and especially LD children.

My dd now attends a small public charter school part-time, while we continue to homeschool academic subjects. She is happy and well-adjusted, and the whole family is less stressed than when we were at Waldorf. Meanwhile, my neighbor is considering Waldorf for her CAPD son for 6th grade and up, and that may be a good choice for him (he does better with lots of hands on activities). However, she is aware that she would need to supplement academics.

Mary

Looking over my post, I realize it might be read as supporting Waldorf’s reading program for kids with learning issues. I didn’t intend it as full-fledged support as much as to say that ALL is not lost within that system. Some of what they do in terms of reading prep is quite good but in my opinion, it’s nowhere near enough. And I profoundly disagree with them about not allowing a child to read till a certain age. For all that they’re quite good at respecting the individual child, this is one area where they have blinders on.

Over the years I’ve probably had a dozen or so kids enter my classroom from a Waldorf school. The ones with no reading issues learned to read literally within weeks - no troubles whatsoever. The handful who did have an LD struggled of course. Some of their regular Waldorf work was good OT for their writing problems but I agree that they should’ve been remediated at an earlier age. One really has to hit the ground running, as they say, when it comes to tackling any reading problems.