Frustrated mom

A few things come to my mind.

1. I would look for another physician. Someone who specializes in diagnosing kids with ADD
and or LD. I use a developmental pediatrician,he has a licensed psychologist on staff,who tested
my two boys. Both happened to have ADHD and LD. I have been to a pediatric neurologist,a
psychiatrist,a psychologist. One who is very familiar with kids and Learning difficulties would be
best. Not all doctors are familiar.

2. If she doesn’t qualify for special education,and you feel she does have a learning disability,I
would consider obtaining an independent evaluation,you do have the right to one at the districts
expense,if you do not agree with the one your school did. Many,Many kids I know,including my
own,have significant disabilities that impact their learning,and the school said they didn’t.

3. Requesting the teacher to document the reason they feel she has diffificulties,what the
difficulties are,etc. not only will help an evaluator looking at your child,but will also help you
obtain special educational services for your kid.

I understand being frustrated,god knows I have been there before. The thing to do is get focused.
What does she need,what is the problems,how can you help her. Answer these questions first.

I totally agree with Socks. The pediatrician should have never dismissed ADD without doing teacher and parent rating scales. More boys are on meds for ADD because they tend to have more behavior problems. Girls are overlooked more, I think.

You indeed may have obtained tutoring that brought your daughter up to a level where she will not qualify for school special ed. services. But really, the better remediation is usually obtained privately anyway. You can always have her tested at a university speech/language/reading clinic and that is usually lower cost than a private clinic.

Janis

Sylvan really doesn’t help much when it comes to reading. They get the child up to grade level on their tests but amazing, they fall back down again. Get the book Reading Reflex, read it and email me personally and I will help you. This is what your daughter needs. The reason why your daughter has fallen down again is her problems with multi-syllable words and those words with the advanced code in them. Typically, kids start falling in fourth grade because of the increase in these words. All she needs is taught how to decode these words and PG does it well. Her symptoms are those of a child who can’t read well enough to learn, hence, she is frustrated, fidgits at her desk, is off task, etc. This doesn’t mean that she has anything wrong with her, just needs to learn how to read better. Please don’t label her, then she really will be lost.

Shay, Hi this is Teresa Sewell, I have emailed you in the past regarding my son Hunter who is 9 years old and in the 4th grade, Hunter reads very well but comprehends very little of what he reads, I have purchased the book Reading Reflex and am about halfway through reading it, can you tell me what I need to do regarding the Reading Reflex method to help Hunter comprehend what he is reading. His class is doing the accelerated reader program he has to read a total of 10 points of extra outside reading in a 6 week period. Hunter is basically a year behind where he should be in reading because of his comprehension problems. I would appreciate any help you can give me. Please e mail me at the following e mail address: [email protected]. Thanks.

This is an irresponsible post. It is impossible to tell what this child needs without a thorough medical and educational evaluation. This child might or might not have a learning disability. She might or might not have ADHD. No one knows because she has not been properly evaluated. It is not right to use promises of a guarnateed cure as means of promoting your anti-ADHD views. You can think whatever you want about ADHD, but you cross over the line when you tell a desperate parent that you have answers that you really don’t.

Hi Shay,

Could you please tell me who the Author is of “Reading Reflex’? Also can we find this book at any book store? I am interested in reading it also. My little boy that is in 3rd grade is not to his grade level in reading also. But he is smart but he gets upset easy when he can’t figure out a word. He does well with everything else except when he gets stuck with something he can’t figure out in 2 seconds flat. Also I have a mildly autistic daughter I think this book would help.
Thanks so much..
Anita

don’t know if this will be any help or not…

I am going to suggest that you take your child to a competant and experienced developmental psychologist. You can find one of these at any Children’s Hospital, and many of the larger universities will also have someone on staff who can do this.

Your dr. may not have done a proper assessment, as socks pointed out. Too often drs. look for extreme hyperactivity, and if they do not see this, they do not dx. That being said, I will also say that too many schools are quick to say ADD, because it gives them an easy out - medicate and if they fail to thrive, who cares. While there are many undiagnosed cases of ADD out there (much more common in girls than boys) there are also a number of children labeled ADD and treated accordingly who have other conditions (dyslexia and CAPD are two examples). To treat the behaviors associated with unremediated LD’s without addressing the underlying cause will almost assuredly condemn the child to failure.

Regardless, it is impossible to diagnose the child online, so please make the necessary noise so you can have a proper eval done ASAP.

On the other aspect of your post…

You do not mention if your child’s school is in the same district that you work in. I am sorry that you are getting frustrated in your attempts to communicate. Perhaps the other teachers feel threatened by you, because being a special ed teacher yourself, you can see thru their b.s. quicker than a non-educator would. I will caution you to please wear kid gloves when dealing with them as much as possible, or you may find that your district will retaliate against you as well.

I am also concerned that these teachers would suggest they supspect your daughter has a problem, and yet would treat her as tho she were doing what she does intentionally. Perhaps they need to get some training on positive behavioral supports and some instruction on how to work with kids with LD’s. Calling a frustrated child who cannot change how they are wired is nothing short of counter-productive, and failure to impliment teaching assistance until a child falls (arbitrarily) two years behind is morally wrong. These children need EARLY intervention, and getting a handle on things ASAP will always be easier and cheaper in the long run than taking the commonly held wait and see approach.

I will also suggest that you contact a good advocate in your area at earliest convenience to begin rectifying what is going on. Being a Sped teacher, I am sure you already have a good idea who this may be ;) Joining a support group for parents of LD kids may also be a good idea. The sharing of information and emotional support from other parents who are going thru the same things as you can help keep you sane and on track.

Good luck to you and please let us know how things turn out.

I think yours is an irresponsible post. Of course anyone searching for a specific diagnosis will find it. The diagnosis of children with this type of problem is extremely subjective and full of problems.

If the child’s main problem is that she is having trouble reading, then she needs to be taught using appropriate methods, methods which the school does not use. I believe that Shay is right to suggest this as the first step in getting help.

When a child can’t read and can’t keep up they will have trouble paying attention. Put yourself in a graduate level math course having never studied math beyond calc 1 and see how well you pay attention. I am sure someone would call you ADD if you were thrust into such a world, even if you normally had great attention.

I believe addressing the dysteachia first is always a good a way to go. If you want a label you can always find someone to give you one.

Just had to say “WHAT a good post, Linda”!
—from a Mom who has seen this in reality — not to put down those who ARE ‘ADD-ADHD’ and NEED meds to stay on task…but they are a far smaller portion of the population than our schools would have us believe. Just the fact that the teachers get UPSET when the poor child asks for further explanations…how would they feel if the Prof in a night course treated them the same way?
Thanks again, Linda!

Susie,

The symptoms you describe are consistent with ADHD, but they are also consistent with the existence of unremediated LD. Without a really thorough examination by an expert in LD and ADHD you are unlikely to get any good answers. I’m sorry to hear that your daughter’s teachers are making things hard for her. Unfortunately, we have a long way to go before people stop blaming children for things over which they have no control. If your daughter were in a wheelchair but were capable of walking a few steps if she mustered all of her efforts, no one would expect her to walk all of the time. For kids with ADHD and LD, however, some teachers see one instance in which the child is able to produce work and then expect the child to do it all of the time. The teachers don’t always understand the effort it took for that one time and think the child is lazy and not trying if she doesn’t keep producing.

Andrea

Hey remember though, it is possible to have adhd and other ld’s. There’s a lot of combos out there, just read some past posts, I was amazed at all the different ways folks can have learning disabilities or differences. I’ve been around since ‘98 reading and learning about all this stuff.

At least for the year to come, I would keep my ear to the ground and try to hear of a teacher who might be a good match for your daughter. Their description of her certainly does bring ADD to mind. I found with my own two ADD sons that they presented a very different picture in the small quiet doctor’s office than they did in a school classroom with 20 other children. Would you consider spending some quiet time sitting at the back of your daughter’s classroom and observing her? Perhaps your own good background in special ed would give you insight as you observe and figure out what spots of the day are hardest for your daughter. Perhaps you would see things that might be done at school or at home that could be helpful to her.

Good luck.

Perhaps your daughter has ADHD, inattentive type. Some kids do not display the typical hyperactive behavior that most people associatte with ADHD. I have a 14 year old son who is dx’d with ADHD, inattentive type, he is considered hypoactive in that he is slow moving, very quiet, ect. Girls are usually the ones to fit this profile and are considered daydreamers. There is a good book out called DAYDREAMERS, DISCOVERS, and DYNOMO’s that might be worth your read. My son says he see’s the world in 3D, he can not turn his thoughts off (his mind is going a mile a minute not his body), he thinks in pictures not words, ect. He says sometimes this helps him in school and sometimes not. He says if he can not “visualize” a word he has a harder time decoding it. He finds classes based on lecture very hard to “pay attention” to and can attend pretty well when visual and hands on techniques are used. Unfortunately in school this does not always happen. He says it is easier to do well in a class when he likes the teacher and has an interest in the subject. We have tried medications for him but have been unable to find a fit for him. What we have found helps in his case is backround noise such as music, the TV ect. We use to insist he do his homework in a quiet place sitting a typical desk and chair, this did not work. When we allowed him to chose his enviroment which was in the family room on the coach with the TV going he was able to “pay attention” better and get the job done. EAch of us is a unique individual and get things done in a different way. Perhaps a search of ADD and the accomodations for these students would help you to understand your daughter better. Good luck to the both of you.

I just have to add to be wary of the “slow learner” dx, particularly if it was done by public school personnel and/or when your daughter was very young. Usually it’s a euphimism for a low IQ. A child with LDs needs a specialist to administer the test because there are way too many things that can contribute to a low score that have nothing to do with intelligence at all. A low IQ score is a ticket to limited or useless services.

I came upon this site in hoping to find ways to help my children and also myself.
We all can learn from each other. I found that doctors and other specialist can label our children but yet they don’t seem to have any answers to help them. I am one of those parents that if I hear something works for another parent I will be willing to try it. What do I have to lose? My little girl has seen every specialist in our state almost. But not one of those doctors can tell me how to work with her.How to improve her life. So it’s my responsibility as a parent to find what ever works. Sometimes we come to a dead end . That is when I start searching for something betteror hope someone has the answer.I have seen Educators even clueless!. I have had teachers in the pass come to me and say ,” What are you doing different’? I sure see a difference! That is when my head swells and tell them. Sometimes the teachers don’t believe me. But who really cares so long as it helps her. If I can help another parent…that is all the better….we are all looking for answers or we would not be here..not specific diagnosis. We know only specialist can do that.
Shay , I would like to know more about the book you are talking about…

The question is what your goals are: do you want an official diagnosis to make the parent *feel* something has been done, do you want ammunition for a guaranteed losing legal battle with the school board (the school board has been down that road before and they know iof they do a delaying action for long enough the kid is too old and in another school anyway); or do you want to look at the actual problem and try to find a pragmatic solution?

In this case, we have a student who has no large overt symptoms but who has a difficulty reading. It is reasonable and responsible to make a first try at treating a reading difficulty by actually *teaching reading* (wow, radical approach, I know, but hey, try it, it just might have something to it.)

Shay is a very strong proponent of Reading Reflex because she has used it with a large number of previously “unteachable” (ie never really taught) students., and *it works*. I personally use different materials but very similar approaches, and *they work*. I keep reminding people that it’s not the brand name on the box that matters, it’s what you do with the materials and how well you kep your eyes on the goal.

Again, if the problem is that the student can’t read, I start by teaching reading, If he/she can’t write, I teach writing. Does this cure everything? No, of course not. But it sure clears out a lot of the deadwood.
If the original problem was just a reading difficulty, the frustration reduces and the bad behaviour reduces and the rest can be cleaned up by parents and school counsellors. If the child is a slow learner, better a slow learner who can read than an illiterate. If the child has ADD or ADHD, learning to concentrate on reading can help develop self-control, and anyway, better to have ADD and be able to read than to be illiterate; medications and other treatments are in the hands of the doctor (and yes, she should see a good one). If the problem is visual or auditory, good teaching can actually help re-train visual and listening skills; also a good teacher can spot weaknesses in tutoring sessions and direct the parents what symptoms to report to the doctor. I really can’t think of a situation where it’s a bad idea to teach reading, presuming the child is at a mental level to benefit from it. OF COURSE you get good medical advice and all the rest of it — but it isn’t an either-or question, is it?

Excellent as always, Victoria!

Janis

My son has both.

Andrea

Anita,

The book is Reading Reflex and the method is Phono-Graphix. Do a search for my past posts and if you want to talk about it, email me directly. Sorry about the lapse of time responding to this post, lost it in my email list.