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fed up!

Submitted by an LD OnLine user on

I am the mom of 6 kids, my oldest is 16 (10th grade). My child was fist labeled ADHD w/ depression then later added a reading comprehension disability. He has had an IEP since th 6th grade where in middle school received help but was quite defiant t say the least with many in and out of school suspensions. In high school he received collaborated classes with an advisory class to review and was told he just didn’t want to do the work. He failed 2 classes making them up in summer school. In the spring for his annual review I was told he really doesn’t need special services but his academic scores and would mayb be weened out in a year. This year I have complained that he is failing 1/2 of his classes. He receives no special outside help other than collab in his main classes but I have been shown no documentation that he is actually getting any help. He is quiet-doesn’t ask for help and does as little as possible. I am out of energy. I do not know what to do for him. The school wants me to send him to tutoring but I say he wouldn’t need it if his IEP worked. Should I accept his failing as no desire? should the school be accountable? I wish I could take him to a educational psychologist but I can find no listing in or around Lexington Kentucky.
What would you do?

Submitted by Anonymous on Wed, 11/13/2002 - 12:54 AM

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Go to the “finding help” section of LD online and find the parent training and resource center for your area. They may be able to offer some advice, as well as a list of professionals in your area. What exactly would you want the educational psychologist to do for you? There are professionals that might go by different titles who could do what you need— hopefully someone in your area. Also, what kinds of transition goals do they have in your son’ s IEP? At 16, the focus should be on preparing him to deal with life after high school. What does he want to do then? My child wants to be a teacher, so the resource teacher is focusing on math skills because that’s where she is likely to have trouble reaching her goal— teachers must pass a math test!

Submitted by Anonymous on Wed, 11/13/2002 - 1:17 AM

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In twenty years of teaching, I have never met the child with no desire to succeed in school. Young people are naturally programmed to want to succeed in school and to care about their performance in school. It’s school that sadly teaches them the hard lesson of hiding their caring.

Your son has reading issues and ADHD and has been depressed. It is unfair to compare him and his school performance to other students. Talk to your family doctor or pediatrician about finding an educational psychologist in your area.

It makes no sense that a student with a reading comprehension disability is given no help. That one issue alone would impact on his performance in all his classes and anywhere where a textbook is used. The work they say he doesn’t want to do is likely very hard or even impossible for him to do with comprehension issues. How are they addressing his comprehension issues or do they think those issues magically went away?

If tutoring is an option - it can be expensive - I would certainly have him tutored until his IEP can be better written and until the school is better meeting his needs. I would also let your son know how unfair this situation has been to him and how sad it is that school does not serve his learning needs better.

Submitted by Anonymous on Wed, 11/13/2002 - 1:52 PM

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Renee, I agree with Sara, I believe your son needs help in school. If you can not understand what you are “reading” or “hearing” what motiviation do you have to attend and try and derive meaning out of it? The analogy I was given is it would be like having no backround in a forgien language but having to start say a french class at level three. Now you have no backround knowledge of the language, have not been exposed, yet are expected to perform at a set standard. If you are like most people you would likely tune out because you just cant understand. Recently the school tried removing my 14 year old from services. I requested to speak to the special ed director to state my case. To the meeting I bought a copy of the Illinois learning standards, the Illinois school codes, and my copy of my sons school file. I was very polite when I met with the director just asked her to listen to my side. I showed her I knew what the state standard was, showed her I knew the law, then related it to my son. Basically I asked her if according to your test my son reads indepentally at the 5th grade level and your standard says child will read at grade level (he’s in 9th) how do you justify removing services. They were basing their recommendation on the fact that he was passing all his classes. I showed them in their rules that grades were not to be used as the sole criteria for inclusion or exclusion of special ed services. It took no more then that. After stating my case the director recommended he stay on his IEP, reinstatement of his accomodations, and offered reading remediation. You need to go to your state board of education site and get the facts. Find out what their learning standards are, get a copy of their education codes, familiarize yourself with the federal code, gather your sons academic and testing information, compare the standards to your sons records, then advocate. I am sure you will find that if your son is given a chance, gets help with remediation, ect he will find that motiviation the school says is lacking. Good luck to you and your son.

Submitted by Anonymous on Wed, 11/13/2002 - 11:54 PM

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Since your child has the right to a Free and Appropriate Public Education,or so it states in the federal laws protecting him,I might have to ask( sweetly of course) who you should send the bill for the tutor to.I would most definitely put this conversation in writing. Send a letter of understanding,stating back to them exactly what was said.But they are obligated to pay for the private tutor if he needs this to progress academicly.In order to change his educational placement,which would include what you are describing,they need your consent. Make very sure you know exactly what you are signing.

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