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Trying to figure out what to do for stepson

Submitted by an LD OnLine user on

My 13 yr old stepson (7th grade) has been living with us for over a year now. We did not have a lot of information about what happened with him before then - we knew he struggled in school but not how much, knew his mother thought he was ADD and he was on 10 mg Adderall twice daily. We stopped the adderall (due to its side effects) and it made no difference at all in his performance. He has terrible spelling/written language skills - this week I went to look at his school file (should have done it long ago) and it turns out that in 2nd grade he was diagnosed learning disabled and the problems he has/had with language were all listed there - along with specific tools that were to have been used to help him, but apparently were never applied! I was blown away! Among them - inability to distinguish vowel sounds, reliance on first few letters to understand a word, reversal of sounds and more, all of which explains why he is a horrendous speller and has such an aversion to doing written work. Reading is ok, although he reads at a 5th grade level … but he does have problems understanding that certain series of letters make certain sounds, like “ent” and “er” (as in, “stargazer”) and spelling very basic words, like “wet”. Anyway, I guess my question is - if he was diagnosed LD in 2nd grade, is he probably still LD now? Also, since he is not failing per se (he definitely manages to gets Cs and pass) is it worth having him evaluated? I am afraid he will never be able to spell and write well - and I see how frustrated he is. Any thoughts? his problems seem so mild compared to what I always thought LD would be like, but for me, in a way, I am afraid I am over reacting because I am a very talented written communicator so I can’t imagine not being able to do these things.

Submitted by Anonymous on Thu, 12/19/2002 - 11:06 PM

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You said he is 14? He was staffed into special education in 2nd grade. It is possible that,
A. He is ADD,and in 2nd grade he was doing poorly enough to qualify as learning disabled,according to your state criteria.
B. It is possible that he is ADD and LD.
C. It is possible to be a talented written communicator and be LD or ADD.
Most people with ADD or LD or both, are quite intelligent,being that this student is still passing would be a pretty good indicator that he is.

I would personally have him reevaluated. If you are questioning the diagnosis,why don’t you seek a second opinion? If he is ADD and in need of medications there are a LOT of different medications out there. If you are dead set against meds,find out what other strategies he can use. If you do not believe he is ADD,but LD,find out.

Submitted by Anonymous on Fri, 12/20/2002 - 12:18 PM

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Of course he’s still struggling with the learning differences that were diagnosed in 2nd grade. He received no remediation for those issues and it’s unusual that a child can fully compensate on their own. That he gets Cs and passes is to his tremendous credit.

That you see how frustrated he is would be a reason to consider having him retested. At the same time, you might want to poke around in your school district a bit and find out just what they would do if his new test results demonstrated the presence of learning differences. What reputation does your district enjoy in regard to its students with learning differences? Do they have helpful programs for him? Not every district does. And not every district receives with gratitude the news that a student has learning differences. (Why was nothing done by the school when he was in second grade?? That doesn’t say much for the district that did the testing then-)

If he is terribly frustrated - and if he would accept help - I’d encourage someone to work with him when he does his homework to relieve that frustration. Remember that assignments are being made to him - not on the basis of his learning differences - but as part of a group of students most of whom do not have issues with writing and spelling. The completion of writing assignments likely takes him longer than others in his class. And his best work is earning him Cs.

The ancient formula that is offered in schools - hard work will find success- is often not true for students with learning differences and that is very frustrating. Frustration usually produces stress, not success. As a teacher and a parent of two ld children myself, I always counsel parents to do whatever they can to relieve the frustration.

Good luck.

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