Just venting here…
My son started back at school yesterday after a 2 week break where he went to Lindamood Bell every day for 4 hours. For this week and next week he will continue there, leaving school at 1 and not finishing his LMB until 5:30. On monday when I picked him up I said to the teacher, “I’ve got his homework folder, but I don’t know if he’ll be doing any this week” and he said “use your judgement” . I followed up with a note stating that my goal was to keep ds up to date on curriculum content, but not to have him complete spelling sentences, worksheets that don’t build on one another. (ie no busy work this week!)
This morning when ds went into the classroom empty handed the teacher told him he had to do his worksheets. When I heard this I called him and he said he wanted to have a meeting to set priorities on which homework should be completed saying it was important to be clear with ds so he doesn’t feel badly he’s not participating in the class. So I pointed out that this is temporary (8 more days!!) and that ds is perfectly happy not to do the worksheets as long as he knows his teacher is in agreement. And he persisted in saying we needed to be clear about which work we were “excusing” my son from doing! So I pointed out ds is doing extra work as it is (and oh by the way if the school had taught him to read this wouldn’t be necessary! - OK I didn’t say that but I’d like to)
So now my husband and I are going in for a meeting tomorrow, my kid is worried about nonsense, and we are all wasting our time about a temporary need to accomodate my child (god forbid).
Ok, now I feel better. Thanks for listening.
Re: I think my head may explode - bad teacher day...
How absolutely frustrating!!!!
Is there any way your son can be “on vacation” for the next 8 days?
Re: I think my head may explode - bad teacher day...
You are paying for this school; you and your husband should just state that your son will be on a family vacation until the end of the LMB program and will then return to class. Unlike public school, there are no mandated 180 school days to complete…just bring him back at the end. If you are not sending him to this school next year, then it won’t influence his school career there anyway.
Re: I think my head may explode - bad teacher day...
We are going in today and despite my frustration I’m sure it will be resolved because ultimately we are right. : ) We do want to keep everyone on the same team if we can b/c if ds doesn’t get into the new school we want he will be returning there. Plus I have another child in the school, plus we may want to mainstream my son back… don’t want to burn any bridges.
My husband was able to catch the school psychologist on the phone and she accknowledged that this teacher is rigid, that we had already discussed eliminating homework for this period, and offered to intervene.
My son doesn’t want to miss school - and I don’t want him to fall behind on the long term projects they are doing. Of course kids miss school all the time - for vacations and what not. Its only 3rd grade!
My aggravation is about the fact that I have to keep reminding this guy about the obvious. The only anxiety my son has felt about this whole arrangement is a result of this teacher!
Thanksk for all the support.
Two words....Control Freak.
Geez, this guy just can’t stand that he is not in control of your son’s learning needs.
I would be sure to point out that your son’s main problem is anxiety and this hoopla is probably adding to that problem. Talk about not seeing the forest through the trees.
Stay calm, be very specific. Make sure that you are both exactly clear about what he will and will not do. Keep your son as uninvolved as possible in this. I don’t think he needs to be worrying about his teachers control issues.
Re: I think my head may explode - bad teacher day...
Since the teacher called the meeting, I’d let him open it. But then quickly (and always nicely say) I’m happy to be here but do we understand that my son’s participation in LB is coming to an end? In the interests of valuable time, I think it would help us to keep in mind that we’re discussing the next 8 days at which time he will no longer be enrolled in L-B.
Good luck!
Re: I think my head may explode - bad teacher day...
Your son attends a private school without classroom or standardized tests or grades, as I recall…why does it matter if he does the homework? My 4th grader has several tests a week, state tests in math and english, and gets points off his grade if his homework is late..this is public school! Why stress him with extra work if it doen’t get reflected in his grades?
Update...
Before the meeting my husband had a chance to review this problem with the school psychologist who totally validated that we had already discussed it, shouldn’t be a problem, here to support you etc.
We went in and the teacher apologized for miscommunicating and confusing my son. He blamed it on just being back from break and he backed off on the homework. Its really frustrating because we clearly discussed this back in november, and I followed up with a note, and all this confusion did was upset my child. Its so clear that if he couldn’t be flexible for these 2 weeks that he isn’t making accomodations in the classroom either.
Its also clear to us that this teacher underestimates what my son is capable of doing and therefore is not the best judge of what we should do about next year. Its also clear that he wants us to take ds out of the school so I made it VERY clear that we will do that only if its to send him to the one school we feel is appropriate. We will not move him to another inappropriate setting , trading one set of problems for others . So now we have to make sure the administration is prepared to back us up if it comes to that. Sigh. Why does it have to be so difficult?
Thanks for the counsel, and for listening.
Re: I think my head may explode - bad teacher day...
Exactly! this is just about personality and control. Not the reality for any third grader . But there’s always some politics involved no matter the system you are in right? In our case we want to make sure the school is supportive of any decision we make so we try to remain calm and reasonable. Think I’ll go meditate now.
Re: Update...
Karen,
This guy sounds ALOT like the teacher I took my son away from. Control issues, underestimating him, and completely rigid.
Same school, different teacher was all he needed. Just a thought.
Re: Update...
Gee, I and my daughter always did the minmum number of worksheets possible to avoid serious trouble. As both student and teacher, I don’t believe in busy work. After a while most teachers give up and accept the status quo.
Re: Update...
I think my son’s current teacher is a master at giving appropriate homework. I feel like I get a good picture of what they did in class that day and he does build on the skills taught in class with this homework. It isn’t long, just very specific. There isn’t alot of glueing, cutting or repetitive writing.
No BS, straight and to the point and then we are done. You and she would be great friends.
Oh, brother. Some people are more interested in “rules” than in real learning.
Hang in there!!!
Beth