I checked in here a few weeks ago with concerns about how my 11 year old son has trouble listening, writing down and remembering the directions.
Last Friday was an eye-opener for me. I’d gotten a call from the teacher because he hadn’t completed his Spanish assignment, even though he’d had time to do it in class. He’d also lost his spelling test sometime between taking the test and handing it in. I went in and helped him clean out his desk and look for this stuff. We talked to his teacher and then went home. (Luckily we live across the alley from the school.)
I opened up his Spanish folder, and the worksheet he hadn’t completed was missing. We went back to school to get another copy from the Spanish teacher. I was standing at the doorway while my son explained what he needed. The teacher gave him a work sheet and then said clear as a bell, “You need a word list to complete this. Come see me Monday and I’ll give you the word list.”
As I walked down the stairs, I asked my son. “So what do you need to do to complete that work sheet?” He had no idea. “What do you need to do Monday?” Still no clue. When I told him that he needed to get a word list from the Spanish teacher it was clear that he had no recolletion of her saying this.
We went home and talked about writing down directions, and strategies to help remember things. We put notes on the calendar and a post it on the mirror reminding him to get this list Monday. I have to say, I was shocked. I knew his short term memory had holes in it, but I hadn’t seen anything quite like this before.
This incident prompted me to explore getting him assessed for central auditory processing problems. We might get the assessment done as part of a NIH-funded speech and language study at a local university. Should be interesting.
When I reported this incident to his homeroom teacher, however, she said my son isn’t the only one in class who does this kind of thing. Maybe so, but I want to know if there is something more going on with him.
Thanks for listening.
Joan
Re: Getting the directions:Update
I just wanted to say that I think you are smart to pursue this.
My son still does the blank look but far less so after we did Fast Forward. He has CAPD.
Re:Every day's a challenge
Thanks for your insights and support. Yesterday after school was interesting. My son remembered that Tuesday is the day to exercise the neighbor’s dog after school. (Yeah!) But he forgot the security system code number so the alarm went off. (Awwww) He went to get the word list from the Spanish teacher and she’d forgotten that she told him to pick it up. He was pleased to see that even grown ups forget things. He also learned he hadn’t lost one of his Spanish worksheets, he’d handed it in. (Yeah!) But he lost his band music folder. (Awwww) That took another trip back to school and the help of two teachers to recover. It all turned out O.K. and we were able to focus on the positives.
Thanks for the tip about Fast Forward. I’m going to look into it.
Joan
As a middle school teacher of 11 year olds, I’d agree with your son’s homeroom teacher. But ,as a parent myself, I know parents like their children to experience success in school.
In my school, teachers often tell parents “they’re all like that ” and indeed many are. By that remark many parents are understandably reassured but at the next marking period, all the kids who are “like that”, get low marks.
When parents then come back to the teachers, the teachers say, “Well, what did you expect? He’s “like that”.
If they’re all like that and inclined to lose handouts, why does the school allow teachers to give out handouts? Why is that an acceptable instructional method when so many kids are “like that?”
Because there are always a few who are not “like that” and those few are awarded the good grades. As a parent I am comforted to know there are many like my son but neither he nor I is comforted when he struggles and does poorly in school because he’s “like that”.
Good luck to you and your son on this interesting journey called school.