ADD/gifted underachiever

Do you think the teacher or the school will change what they do for your son based on his diagnosis? The reason we make diagnoses is to offer treatment. Many of the parents who post to these BBs have IEPs for their children. You might post asking specifically about the IEP process and how successful it’s been for ADD/ADHD kids. You could also keep your ear to the ground in your school community and find out what’s been done for other ADD/ADHD kids in this school.

That he takes medication is no one’s business but your own unless you want it to be. Teachers can certainly project their own experiences onto their students and their families. As nothing is likely to change this teacher, this may be one of those years that just needs to be gotten through. A teacher’s style of teaching is often so ingrained that there is little administrators can do.

But sometimes they can permit the child to change classes. How are the other teachers in his grade. If not for this year then for next,you might consider having him placed with a teacher that you’ve had some input on. Ask other parents about the year ahead and find out what’s what. You can use the leverage of this not so good year to wheedle your son into a better teacher for a better year next year.

I would try to have my son’s class switched and spare him the cookie cutter method of her dealing with a child with ADD. Let his self esteem and love for learning flourish.

I too believe he needs another teacher. Good idea:-)

Has your son also been evaluated for learning disabilities? Some gifted “underachievers” are actually struggling with LD. My son is both gifted and learning disabled, with inattentive ADHD like your child. For him, adderall has been a miracle drug, although it doesn’t work for all kids. Whether you give your child medication is nobody’s business but your own. His teacher is way out of line. One thing you could do to ensure that your child receives the accomodations he needs is to get a 504 plan in place. If your child also has learning disabilities, then you are entitled to an IEP. As anyone here would tell you, having these plans in place is no guarantee that your child will get what he needs, but without a plan, the chances are even greater that he will continue to be subjected to self-esteem-lowering situations. If I were you, I would proceed with a medication trial without telling the teacher. You should be able to tell if it is working by whether your child is completing more work in school and whether the negative comments are decreasing. Even if it works, I might never tell his teacher about it. Adderall is usually taken only once a day (although some kids take it more often), so there is no reason that she should have to know about it.

Andrea

My own son is on an iep, he qualified for sp.ed. under the other health impaired category(add/intattentive). He has had teachers that weren’t especially adept at handling the needs of an add’er, most have been pretty good. His 3rd grade teacher though was a screamer, that was the year that I took my son to a counselor because he was so angry with himself and school.

Definitely I would consider getting your son tested for any underlying ld’s, it is fairly common for add to coexist with other problems. However, if you have already ruled those out, then the underachieving part is probably a result of your son’s teacher and her attitude. These guys can be so sensitive to all criticism even that not directed at them.

My son used to take comments from other kids to heart, like ‘all you kids are dumb’. He would struggle with homework, cry and say he was dumb. When I asked how he came up with that he would tell me what had happened at school, I would then ask him about several of his friends and whether he thought they were dumb. He would say no they weren’t, so I would help him with the logic that if at least 3 or 4 kids that he knew weren’t dumb, then he wasn’t either, since they were all part of the class. I also had to explain in this instance that the kid who started this stuff had issues of her own and was trying to make herself feel better by putting others down. An ongoing conversation unfortunately.

Anyway, talk to the teacher again about how your son is feeling in her class and if her attitude seems to be oh well, then you really need to insist to the principal that you want your son moved. We tried to move our son out of his 3rd grade class but weren’t able to since we were 4th in line(tells you something huh?). She was better after a leave of abscence for surgery. My guess and what I told my son was that maybe she was in pain and that is what caused her to act the way she did before the leave. Also my son does much better with a teacher who is warm and friendly, you may find that to be true for your son as well.

There are lists of accommodations on this site, look under abc’s or in depth. If you find that these would help your son, then ask for a 504 meeting with your school because your son qualifies at least for some of these accommodations. If you go for the testing and qualify for sp.ed. you can have these accommodations put into the iep. I know folks have had a hard time getting some teachers to follow the ieps and 504 plans, however we have had good luck in 2 school districts getting them followed(the iep). One other thing to think about is getting your son counseling, hopefully that can help with his self esteem. I did help my son to recognize his anger and how to cope with it.It also gave him someone neutral to talk to, you know how they love to listen to mom…not. I hope I helped, best wishes.