Looking for some info and help!

9 YEAR OLD ADHD BEHAVOR PROBLEM!

Having started this road in Feb 2002, just today my 6 1/2 year old son was diagnosed with ADHD by a pediatric neurologist.

Having a child with ADHD is like falling into a puzzling world of uncertainty. Even though we have a professional diagnosis answers to questions are still very grey. For our family,right now at least, ADHD is very abstract - and that is very hard to swallow. Even with the ADHD population growing every child’s portfolio is unique. There is no one right answer. Days, weeks, months are filled with trial and error.

We simply avoid situations which cause overstimulation.

My son is an inventful, bright original thinker. I hold on to the fact that I know he will succeed greatly as an adult. My care, concern and energy is that he have a happy, non-judgemental childhood and an educational environment which will understand, promote and entice his divergent thinking. Although I know it may be the best decision for the current times we live in, I personnally resent the fact he will be on medication in order to be socially accepted and in order to conform to traditional teaching techniques. What percentage of our children will be on medication as numbers of ADHD expand? What is being done to prepare for this future? More and more children are born with highly active minds…how is society preparing to accept this?

You may quote me as “Mom with a child with a very active mind”.

We have known “unprofessionally” for years that he is ADHD but felt he was to young to really need a label. I would have been shocked if the psychologist had found him not to be ADHD. Our guy is not yet 5 years old, but he has an assortment of nicknames and ‘code names’ we refer to him as, but don’t always verbalize when he or siblings are within earshot: Wild monkey, you crazy-guy, Damian(his Aunt’s reference), demon-child, wee-devil, dynamo, the angelic-one(sarcastic), the wild-child, energizer bunny, speed-racer.
We have an older son who was once nearly as wild and he is now grown to a teenager. He is an active fun high-energy guy. He is one of the coolest most insightful young men around town. He has an ability to rapidly analyze and strategize situations and events several years beyond his natural age. A gift of sorts, which most adults don’t possess, we suppose.
We ‘tried’ to remediate the LD (somewhat successful), but never medically treated the hyper/attention part. His education has definitely suffered a bit, but lately his mind is growing and things which were once difficult are becoming simpler and easier for him.
> Most importantly, emotionally he is 100% together, well-adjusted and happy. With all the ~Energy~ he is a phenomenal athlete. This allows him to settle down enough to pay attention in class as long as we keep him on a higher protein, low sugar diet. The athletic skills also boost the self-esteem and provide him with an area for success amongst his peers.
The high impulsivity left medically untreated has been a factor getting through the middle school years. Outside of school, he has gotten in to some trouble. He has spent the past 3 years in a very strict, private, small class school and we have initially been very restrictive of his freedoms. As he has learned from the mistakes that the impulsivity cause, he has responded with much more self-control and we have relaxed and allowed him much more freedom.
Hopefully, high school will suit him and we will see more academic improvement as his brain develops in areas that perhaps have been relatively “untapped” in years past. The new high school is still private but much larger than what he is accustomed to and we hope he doesn’t get over-stimulated and get into trouble. Overall, I think that ADHD can be a long-term “blessing” in disguise, it just requires so much more enormous effort on the individual’s part and those who surround him to reach that blessing. Perhaps these thoughts appear premature to some, but we have a very strong belief that our kid is not only going to make-it, but excel in whatever he chooses as his life’s passion.

We called our son the “Landshark”. Having an ADD/ADHD child was never being able to trust that any experience would go smoothly - we had to learn to be ready to leave some functions, make excuses for others. Now that he is a teenager we have had to deal with car accidents with greater frequency than perhaps do other parents. He is even more volatile than others his age.

And at the same time he has endless energy. He’d rather work than not. He can liven up a wedding, lighten up a room, all within days after totaling the family car…

It’s a rollercoaster.

We new for along time that she was different from her twin sister. Started her at age 4 in a special preschool for her speech and motor skills. Just got the diagnosis of ADHD last August(2001). Started her on medication in Sept and have seen wonderful improvements in her attention at school. Still academically behind her sister by about a year and a half but have made many leaps and bonds to get to where she is today. She has to have a very structured day from the time she gets up until she goes to bed or she gets into trouble. One of s the things that makes her special is she is a very loving and caring child. She loves to hug and is very concerned when someone is hurt or injured. Has focused enough to start enjoying sports. We were told that she was boarder line retarded. We would not hear that. She is a bright young lady but at times has a hard time expressing that. She wants to be like everyone else and does everything she can to be just like them. We believe that she can do anything and be anything she wants to be.

Janet, as I recall there is a doctor on this website who was once told that she was mentally retarded in early elementary. Looks like she proved them very wrong. My neighbor’s child had the same diagnosis and he is doing pretty well in 7th grade although he should be in 8th. I think it is hard to label and categorize kids at such a young age.

Could the increase in the identification in children with ADHD be the fact that we expect our children to keep up with the crazy modern lifestyle that all of us lead today. When I was a child life was certainly much simpler and I was not crashing into bed at 11 p.m. because of afterschool activites (both parents and kids) then finally homework. We’re told that a well-rounded kid does A, B, C, then if he/she is really motivated and wants to be successful they’ll be able to accomplish D-Z by bedtime. Never mind that mom and/or dad have their own 700 things to do before bedtime. I’m a wreck by the end of the day, I can only imagine the stress kids feel inside. We are all on super-automatic pilot to get everything done and we expect that the kids can keep up the same pace without ill-effect. When adults hit overload we look to chemicals too, prescription meds, alcohol, etc. to take the edge off of the chaos and make us better able to conform to what society considers acceptable. I don’t wish to dismiss the true existence of adhd, I know it is very real. But it is so common for ADHD to be the first consideration of why a kid can’t cope. I also think we have too much information these days and try use it to our advantage. We have also forgotten that kids are kids, they’re gonna get crazy sometimes and their not gonna know how to come down. Maybe it’s just a matter of saying no more than once in a while and get back to basic living? Just a thought.

Amen

My son was diagnosed as having ADHD and a learning disability about 3 years ago, he is now 10 years old. I find that having the label can help a child or make life more difficult for a child. Some teachers out there do not have the skills to teach children with this diagnosis. Our son was two years behind in his education. We decided that the school he was attending was part of the problem. We advocated for change and he is now at a school that is more traditional. Very structured and focused, at his last school we had put him on ritalin and the teacher had not notice the difference. It was obvious to us that she had not been paying atention in the first place. She saw the label as a way to ignore our son. I noticed the difference in his behavior within the first hour of the first pill and I wish that we had put him on the medication years ago. I did try many other natural remedies, one that was effective was ADFX although our insurance did not cover the cost. I hear many bad comments about ritalin and for us it was a last resort. In one year he has almost achieved grade level, has made friends, has learned to play the violin with grace and beauty, on his own. One of the best things we did is to advocate for a good educational program specifically designed for children with ADHD and Learning Disabilities. Having a teacher who is familiar with these childrens learning issues has been our sons life saver. I hope that one day the ritalin will not be required,
but if it is so be it. It was something I did not want to try, like many other parents but by not trying it I was closing the door on something that may prove to be just what our son needed and now I see the results, I am happy I made the coice to give it a try.Yes, we see a different side of our son when he does not take his medication but it is not because of a chemical dependancy to the drug, it is because he once again suffers the inability to cope with the enviroment around him and within himself. Unfortunatly we do not live in a world where the enviroment can be controlled. There have been comments from others on this chat line that are against the medications, obviously they have not seen the tourment these children go through or have a true understanding of ADHD. My son would not be doing as well or come as far as he has in the last year without the medication. The combination of a different classroom environment, education program geared for his learning issues, and the medication is what has made the difference.

I do have a personal experience to share with you. My twelve year old cousin was diagnosed with ADHD about two years ago. She always did poorly in school and had really bad social skills. A lot of her peers never wanted to be around her because she was so loud and obnoxious. Once diagnosed with ADHD, her doctor put her on Ritalin. I can’t express enough, just what a positive impact Ritan has had on her life. She has calmed down so much, yet she still has her cute little spirit. Her grades have improved alot, and she has established new friendships because of this change for the better.
A suggestion that I would also make for a child with ADHD is to try your best to eliminate any outside distractions that may throw your child off schedule.
A great place to look on the internet for some good information on ADHD is www.chadd.org

I understand the reluctance; I didn’t want my children “labelled” so I was avoiding even getting an assessment. After talking with friends who were mental health professionals, I decided I was not giving my children the chance they might need. I am so glad I had the boys assesses. They are both ADHD, tho one is more noticibly hyperactive. They are now 11 & 9 years old & have been on medication for 4 years. In January, we changed from adderall to adderall XR. Both boys report noticing a difference & so did the teachers. Their grades continue to be inconsistent, but seem to be more up than down.