Today is my son’s first day of “Upper Elementary” and he is well on his way to a major meltdown. Yesterday he was crying for part of the day. He is nervous about lockers, changing classes, new kids, the lunches, and just about everything. I have tried to explain that there will be almost 500 other kids who have no idea what they are doing and he is not the only one feeling this way…but he just ended up in tears over the can opener!!!
Has anyone else out there dealt with an ADHD’er who didn’t handle change well at all?? And how was the end of the first day of Upper Elementary/Middle School?? How long will this last?? How bad with this be when he gets home today??
I agree with the entire “Upper Elementary” setup because it prepares them for the Middle School without being there. They change classes in the same way (Team approach) but are in their own separate school. I am questioning this for today knowing that he has to change schools again in 2 years!!
Re: Upper Elementary
Mamm;
Just reassue your son things will be okay. You will be there for him, because, kids are nervous going into new situations and ADD kids are no diffrent. Contact your LDA association or ADD association and ask for more tips on how to help the adjustment. Do not delay…. My folks did, aand today I regret we did not do things diffrently. Middle schol can be a tough time, but handled right things will be okay.
Re: Upper Elementary
Luckily at the last minute they moved a girl he has liked since 2nd grade into his class and since they are in order alphabetically her locker is right next to his. She was unable to unlock her locker all day and had him do it for her. That made him feel like the most important person in the world.
This was so good since there was only one student he knew of going into yesterday. They are supposed to make sure there are a certain number of students from each elementary school in each class, however his is a little different because he is in accelerated math and a gifted pull out for part of the day. The math kids went onto one specific team and the pull out kids went onto a mixture of 2 team depending on whether or not they were in the math or not. Out of 23 students in his class, technically 4 should be from his old school.
He was feeling much better when he came home yesterday and mainly talked about having to open “her” locker. The 2 of them have always been in the same class (not just the same school) since they are both in the math program. I am sure this will be an on and off process for the next several weeks while he adjusts but her being there is a wonderful thing. He can perseverate on her!!!!
Students are very nervous in these transitions at that age. It’s not uncommon for many children to feel that way, ADHD or not. What I found can smooth the path is a caring teacher. Is there one on his grade team that you could make aware of your son’s feelings who might go the extra step in helping him to feel comfortable?
Call around to some other parents and find out how their children are feeling. It might help your son to specifically hear that other students are also crying over their can openers.
The plus in all this in the middle school where I’ve taught is that there comes an increased sense of freedom with the increased challenge and responsibility. The lockers - which are a challenge in the beginning - are also a fairly private place and much preferred over their elementary school desks or cubbies. Once they get the hang of the locks, they usually love the lockers. Depending on school policy, the insides of lockers can be personalized and some student love to add a few shelves - easily and cheaply purchased at any office supply store - or sometimes even some stickers or removable posters that help the locker space to feel like their own.
A watch, especially one with a beeper, can help a great deal with changing classes.
Good luck.