My grandson who lives with me has ADD and started medication in first grade.He did very well in elementery school but his medication had to be changed/adjusted a few times.This year, his first year of middle school has been a disaster.He finishes very little classwork and does very little homework, mainly because he can’t remember if he has any and if he does he can’t find it.He is failing 4 classes big time.I talked to his teachers who seemed to understand ADD but were “no nonsense” teachers.One teacher suggested that I check his locker for lost or hidden homework/classwork.I did.”oh my gosh”!!! These lockers are about 4 feet tall…24 inches wide.From the floor up were 7 months of papers cramed and stuffed into this locker.I didn’t know to laugh or cry. I got angery.My grandson was with me and I ask him to please pull everything from his locker.He pulled his coat hood over his head and sat on the floor surrounded by a mountain of papers.Other parents, teachers stopped to look.One told him he better get organized.The cleaning lady kindly gave us a large trash bag.I swear the papers half filled it up.Once home we dumped the papers onto the floor and went through them.He spent the weekend doing a lot of back homework that his teachers will not except now.
My grandson is overwhelmed in middle school.He has not adjusted to this different world.Other then above he is a good 11 year old.Thanks for reading this and your input would be valueable.
Re: Is this normal?
Janet, you also did not mention whether or not he is classified or getting some sort of support at school. I am concerned that there has been some upheveal in his life, (forgive me for assuming from your post), and he may really need some type of support & guidance in school. If he is failing ‘big time’ as you stated, I am also concerned about his social/emotional well being. I think that you need to ask the school for help… due to his ADD he is at least entitled to a 504 plan which could assist him in getting more organized. You did not say what state you are in, but if you would like more specific help toward getting him assistance, please post and let us know. There are many of us who could guide you to the assistance you need… (By the way, as a grandmother you know that there is no normal when it comes to puberty…. but his failing grades, embarassment at the ‘mess’ he has become and his inability to organize, when need to be checked).
Re: Is this normal?
Your grandson sounds like he is in need of more support than he is getting from his teachers. My own inattentive adhd son doesn’t do all that well with the serious ‘no nonsense’ type teachers. They seem rigid and inflexible and with our kids that just isn’t a helpful attitude to have. You might revisit the medicine question also.
I especially take offense that the teachers have apparently waited this long to even give you notice. 7 months of work is way too long to let something go on.
Teachers dropped the ball on this.
Does he have a planner? You could make a contract with him where he writes down homework, gets the planner signed by the teacher (ensures hw written completely and correctly) and then signed by you showing you looked at it. Then assign points for the signatures that he can use towards a reward. I did this in my son’s 6th and 7th grade years, I also got the teachers to sign the contract so that all the responsibility wasn’t mine and my son’s. This year in 8th I have not needed the contract, it is now a habit for him.
Another thing, have the teacher ask for hw specifically from your grandson at the beginning of each class. It should be a no brainer but sometimes…I also used to go through my son’s binder when I was told that he was missing assignments. Lo and behold, there they all were. He was on a block schedule, he would barely remember he had the class much less that he did hw for the class.
If he has had academic difficulty for some time, I would suggest making a written request for a full psychoeducational evaluation. This would rule out or in any coexisting learning disabilities. If they found that the adhd was causing the difficulty he could qualify for special education services under Other Health Impaired. If he didn’t qualify, you could then ask for a 504 plan that would help him receive accommodations that would give him some success in school.
There is much more, look at the abc’s of ld and adhd as well as the ld in depth sections of this site. Just cruise around the site, there is lots of information here. I hope this helps. Best wishes.
Amy
Re: Is this normal?
Please excuse me… but does she really have to do all this ALONE? Isn’t this why we have pupil assitance committees and child study teams? Is there an unwritten code that I, as a newer member of this particular community, am not fimiliar with? If this child is classified, then he has an IEP that is a. either not being implemented or b. is in need of some serious revising. This would be the exact same situtation if he has a 504 plan. Do we not pay, through our taxes, for the services and supports that this young man requires? Or is it that I am niave in thinking that we should go to them for help and assistance and hold them accountable? I really am trying to figure all of this out and any insight would be welcome.
Re: Is this normal?
First of all I would get all the school help that I could. (504 plan or OHI) That being said, my son is 14 and in the 8th grade and bright and without my continued daily support he too, would be failing. I call the homework hotline every night to find out his assignments or else have the teachers provide a written list of homework at the begining of every week. I basically make him do it to the best of my ability. We have good days and bad days. He does not stay organized and I am afraid that I will be helping him in this area all the way through high school. I go through his papers every night looking for assignments and helping him organize. I am sure that many would say I do way too much. I was told by his former psychiatrist that ADHD kids tend to be rather late in assuming responsibility for their work. Plus, they are missing or have difficulty with many of the skills at school. Good luck.
LIKE PATTYL'S SUGGESTIONS.
PattyL has some great suggestions.
I would get to the Dr - get either on a new med or get adjusted. Get a 504 plan going and get him out of class for either Spec Ed or some kind of homeroom where he can have one on one attn and get some work done during sch hrs.
Gosh - I do hope that he can get a handle on things before this entire sch is a wash.
Loves and hugs,
S
In a perfect world
Gloria,
Yes there are all those interventions available in school. However, from what I have seen and experienced, the amount of help a child receives from school is equal to the amount asked,pleaded,demanded for by the parent/guardian.
I think I was in a rare position where the teachers suggested evaluation during the parent teacher conference but many more people have to fight just to get the initial evaluation started.
Amy
Re: In a perfect world
You are right, it is not a perfect world, and you are also right that most parents have to fight to get what they need from the schools, (I am no exception), but, I don’t think that means that we should shy away… My feeling is that it is time that we as parents begin to take the “cookie” back. The only way that we are going to make the CST’s accountable is if we, parents, work together to educate each other and to support each other. WE need to be fully informed of our rights and we need to know the law. We need to seek out other parents in our communities and bring eachother to the IEP meetings. One thing that has not really chaged about Special Ed, and this is my opinion and my opinion only, is that we still keep it a very private matter. It is very difficult to look out or child and accept that they are less then perfect and even harder, as an adult to tell another adult that “I need help”. Even though it will be a fight, an argument, a ton of emotional stuff once we go to the schools, we would be doing our children an equal injustice by not going.
Patty
(PS Sharon, thanks for the supportive note!)
Janet,
He may need another adjustment to his meds, or even an entirely new medication. At 11-12 years old, kids start to enter puberty and that can throw everything out of whack. What medication is he taking?
Andrea