clothing

He’s not the only one! Many kids w/ ADHD have some special sensitivities to touch, sound, smell etc. Sounds a lot like symptoms of “sensory integration dysfunction”. I haven’t read it, but many parents recommend a book called The Out of Sync Child.

It is a terrific book. I have learned not to take tags off of clothes until my son has had a chance to wear them around the house. I have him wear new sneakers around the house for a couple of days too. This way I can return anything he has a problem with. I also had (past tense yes) a stepdaughter with NLD and the same problem-all tags had to be cut out of her clothes, she had to wear summer pajamas in the winter because she couldn’t stand the weight of winter pajamas, she can’t stand jeans only sweats or loose fitting pants, and she can’t wear those in style camisole tops because she pulls the bottom hem apart from pulling it down constantly.

It is common with ADHD because they have an inability to filter distractions. Things that most of us can ignore drive them nuts. Bug bites drive my son nuts and the few times he has had poison ivy were HORRIBLE!! Occupational therapists can offer therapy to desensitize them to these issues.

I read the book and it was really good and there is a new follow up book that came out recently-a friend of mine read it but I have not yet. Definitely get the book.

Dear Dorothy
Hi I’m new here, but I can relate totally to your problem with clothes it is so difficult to get it right isn’t it. All I can say is maybe try to find a strength in him to help him with his weakness here, if it is a weakness. My son is the same with his clothes but he is only 7 he is a lot younger but I have helped him to be aware of how say another guy he admires looks of course I don’t mean belittling him because they are too sensitive to deal objectively with this, just in a positive way. However, I have to say that with their competitive/ perfectionistic/ focused aspects I also think this could become too important. So I guess you have to think about that too. I can see it budding in my 7 year old already.

Regards Janette

Sounds like SID issues to me - sensory integration dysfunction…..clothes and food are huge issues for these kids (mine included)…..they make seamless socks and tshirts these days.

Loves ;)
S

This does not sound unusual. I’ve met other ADHD children who complain of clothes being restrictive. I have one ADHD girl in my class who will not wear anything with a waist to it. All her dresses must hang loose and if she wears slacks, it’s always sweats.

Your son is young and things may change. I like to wear sweats myself. And Albert Einstein refused to wear socks his entire life. When he was going out one night to a friend’s party, his wife insisted he wear socks. He said that they would be among friends and friends would not judge him for his unsocked feet.

When he was getting dressed to accept a Nobel Prize, Einstein again refused to wear socks. His wife pointed out they would not be among friends that night. He acknowledged that and said “Then why would I wear socks? I don’t care what strangers think of me.”

He also never combed his hair.

My own son began to care very much about his looks as he went into his later teenage years. From fighting with him to get him in the shower, we had to fight to get him out of it. He went from geling his jar, to moussing his hair, from expensive precision haircuts to finally shaving his head…

I’ll take the uncombed hair anyday.

Glad to know I’m not alone. My 9yr daughter drives me insane. Will not wear jeans. Plays softball, but hates the pants because of the elastic in the legs. If her clothes shrink after washing she has such a fit because they don’t fit loose enough. So I might buy something she loves, will wear it once and then hates it after it has been washed. I never considered SID for her, she is ADD inattentive. I think I will be reading the book ASAP.

Thanks for bringing this topic up.

Oh my so glad to hear not alone as well. My 10 year old will not wear jeans either and shoes must be a half of size too big. Plus the hardest is her hair is thick and long i mean down to her waist she grows it for “Locks of Love” which is a foundation that makes wigs for children who suffer from the effects of treatment for cancer. Any way the hair needs to be pulled up in a pony tail on top of her head without a single hair out of sorts no lumps no bumps nothing It sometimes takes forever. She too plays softball and they have to wear sliding shorts they are very constrictive she pulls at herself constitantly to the point the mothers in the stand start telling her to stop. She laughs bless her little heart. I had no idea that the ADD and this are related. But makes sense. We do the same things with tags. because it gets so costly. We also have the same pj issues nothing warm and always has to have peds on her feet.

My son was like this. He has sensory integration issues. After a year of occupational therapy he can wear anything.

Dear Sara,
Where did you get such wonderful information on Einstein? I find reading about these people who were also very “different” so interesting and a relief. Is it from a good biography? I read a book called Great Lives from the library which I would love to own it was a small story of many famous inventors’ lives they were also so different and mostly lousy at school but in those days they had the privilege of being able to leave school and do things at home with their parents/mother (academic success does not necessarily equal intelligence; from one of Mary MacCracken’s books). They eventually attached their focus to their invention/s or ideas and that was their whole life from then on.

Thanks for that additional bit of comforting information, it also shows that you can usually find a way to get around things like this for instance there are some quite nice looking sweat pants in our days at the shops we buy those. Who invented fashion anyway!

Love Janette

Hi Linda
I was wondering, what do they do to accomplish this? Are there some things we can do at home?

Thanks
Janette

My 8 yo son mostly wears cotton twill pants. He has said the same thing about jeans. He will only wear the light weight denim that are loose fit. As for his shirts, he will only wear t-shirts or long sleeved shirts. Nothing with button or collars. But this is an attirer that we can agree on. Maybe you could try something along this line. One more thought, he likes his pants a little bit big or with an elastic waist band. Good luck. Jodi

It is hard to say what we did that accomplished this because we did so many things and then all of a sudden one day he starting wanting to buy Khakis after years of only sweats.

I read the book, “The Out of Sync Child,” and followed their suggestions for providing the right sensory diet. I had him downstairs on the skateboard throwing baskets into the hoop, jumping off the stairs in a controlled fashion while I held out my hands, he had to grab my hands when he landed. We often did this before homework when attention was really needed. I also give him big, loving bear hugs when he starts running around acting hyper. I could see it in his eyes when he felt out of control. Every time he seemed a bit out of sorts, (moody inattentive etc) I would do these things until now we don’t really need to do them that much anymore. He seems to have learned to do this on his own and will go for a bike ride to get his head together.

He also was in a sensory integration group at school.

I had taken him to an outside sensory integration OT who recommended interactive metronome for his issues. It really helped him in many ways but I don’t know if it impacted the clothing issues, I would guess that it probably did.

I have found that for him eggs make a big difference. I don’t know why. I tried essential fatty acid supplements and it didn’t make a difference. The eggs have protein and efa’s but I don’t know what is doing it. All I can say is that when I stop the eggs he is more moody.

We are also doing vision therapy but the clothing issue was better before we started. The vision therapist we go to deals with many of his remaining sensory integration issues. He still has a bilateral motor integration issue.

Hi, Linda and thanks again,

I have ordered that book and am looking forward to reading and trying the things in it. What made you pursue other things while you were trying it out like IM what were the other issues that made you try IM?

What is bilateral motor integration issue?

We have Vision Therapy in Australia but not IM. This may sound naieve but I saw their website and wondered would something like say learning rhythms on a drum help in a similar way?

How long have you been on this website, you all sound so experienced? It’s helping a lot.

Janette

I wish I had found this site years ago! My 10 year old daughter won’t wear jeans, etc. and we had so many cloths that never got worn. But after I got an attitude adjustment (it was so frustrating in the beginning!!), I can now buy the particular underpants from Limited Too that she likes, the particular socks from the Gap that she likes, and even the grandparents have now all successfully purchased soft jackets, etc. We had a daily routine of brushing with a special little sponge with bristles on it (our daughter loved the attention, and then she enjoyed doing it herself). She would also jump into her cloths and then YELL for me to QUICKLY “absorb” her. I would squeeze and rub her as tightly as I could (fun!) until she felt comfortable in the clothes.

I’m happy to report that just yesterday, we went out with her grandmother to buy a new dress (not a situation I would normally put us all through), and my daughter announced, “MOM, I don’t need anyone to absorb me anymore!” It made me realize that we’ve really come along way, and it was a combination of her sensitivity decreasing, as well as all of us embracing that this sensitivity is real, not her fault, and we now make realistic clothing choices. (the dress we tried on was silky smooth on the inside.)

best,

kathryn

That sounds wonderful to see such growth and I can really see how that “absorbing” would work. My son and I use hugs to overcome some of his difficult behaviour hugs are a really powerful thing.

It is also so right what you say about accepting it as real and such a relief to be able to do so within yourself.