on the verge of tears

We all have days like that. When that happens I usually find a family member to take him off my hands for a day and then I either sleep all day, veg out on TV (mindless shows of course) or go out in the sun and remember that the world is beautiful. If you can get your son to bed at a reasonable time take a relaxing bath.

When it gets really bad and it takes “two hours to do 5 math problems” I don’t fight with him anymore. We take a break (usually I can’t sit through two hours so after the 1st 30 min if it doesn’t look good— I break stuff up with time limits, i.e. if in 15 min he can get 5 problems done he can have a 10-15 min. break than we come back and do another five).

Anyway, nowhere is it written that you have to be nice all the time. Sometimes you just have to go ahead and scream. :)

I think you just give up for the day. Go rent a movie that is educational or go to the park.

When I start feeling really impatient with my child (and I don’t homeschool, although I do tons of work with my child), it usually means we need to do something different. A different approach, a break from therapy, something. It is almost spring break time in the schools—maybe you should take a spring break with your child and not do anything academic for a week. You might really feel better.

Beth

Thanks for all the support and advice. You gave me some good ideas.Hope everyone has a great day today! Jan

Just don’t feel guilty. Guilt is a useless emotion.

It is difficult and exhausting. Definitely do as the other says and take some time for yourself. It is the best thing you can do for yourself and your child.

I have one friend who I always call when I need a break. We go out to dinner and just talk. She can hear it in my voice when she gets the call and I have heard it in hers.

It’s time!

Just to elaborate. I had been trying to get my son to automate his 7, 8, 9s in multiplicaiton. With the help of his therapist, we had devised a procedure. Before we got all the way through it (did get through with 0-6), we got interpreted by preparing for our standardized exams. Anyway, I tried picking up where we left off. After two weeks, he still couldn’t tell me 8 X 7. I was getting so aggravated and impatient. I couldn’t believe he couldn’t do it—it almost seemed deliberate to me. Just at the place where I really felt like yelling, I gave up. We stopped doing it altogether and backed up to an easier procedure. He is back bouncing on the ball chanting his times table and skip counting forward and back.

So sometimes when things are too hard, they are too hard. It doesn’t seem like it to us but our kids’ brains don’t work like ours. If you are beating your head on the wall, back up to something much easier. (Or take that trip to the park!!!)

Beth

Here is a tip for 7 x 8.

5678.
7 x 8 = 56

I always remember this being the hardest one to remember for me.

I know it wasn’t the point of your post but thought I would throw that in as it helps me.

I know what you mean when you are just looking at them like please just get this. As if you could just will it into their brain.

Sometimes my son is just unplugged and I know to just quit and try again another day.

Thanks Ladies, Today is going much smoother. I decided to give him his easy work first and then math. He is doing great. He has already done 3 problems in 20 mins.! I’ll try to keep in mind that he DOES find some things very difficult!! Thanks, Jan

Neat trick. I always had the most trouble with 6 X 9 and 7 X 9. Boy, do I know them now!!!!!

BTW, did you get the sequencing work from Audioblox (that you posted on math board). Thought it was interesting—same sort of stuff we’ve done with Neuronet and very different from PACE. PACE assumes a higher level of functioning—which was our problem. It has you jumping on trampoline and doing addition, subtraction, multiplication ect. Couldn’t get any of it and now I see we really had to go back much further and work on basic sequencing.

Maybe we should have done Audioblox instead. The reason I didn’t is that it doesn’t have the auditory processing work that PACE does. Now my son couldn’t do that either…..but I didn’t know that when making the decision.

Beth

Yes, that was from audiblox.

I think audiblox is awesome. I saw gains in the 3 weeks we did it before we started VT. We still do that particular part of it. I think when we do it again I might go through a program tailored for him that they do over the internet. He really needs the logic and reasoning piece and I would like to work more specifically in that area.

Here is the plan. Audiblox and IM (again) this summer. VT at least until the fall.
I am considering adding the listening program.

Then if all else fails we will do PACE next summer.

One thing if you are going to do audiblox you have to be really committed. You have to do it exclusively. At least that is what I think and they recommend.

What do you mean by exclusively? You are doing several other things as well—IM, and eye therapy. How long do you do Audioblox for?

I haven’t figured out what to do for this summer. Been thinking about working on the logic and visualization piece as well as multisyllable words. Been debating whether to buy Mindprime for visualization—little to early to see if the visualization we’re doing with Neuronet will be adequate.

Beth

I guess I just meant you can’t do it with other programs and school. I had to stop when we started VT and it really bothers me that we stopped because I saw huge gains with Audiblox in a short time and am not seeing big leaps in academics with VT. I see the need for VT because it is a major deficit area and I think once we deal with his visual sensory issues everything including audiblox will be easier. (I know I am speaking to the choir ;)

We will be doing audiblox this summer with VT but we will be well into the VT at that point and more used to it.

I guess I just meant that it takes a level of intensity to work. You really have to focus on improving the skill of each exercise and taking it to new levels.

I think the more intensively you do it the better the gains.

Sometimes I really consider homeschooling for a semester and giving it our all.

I won’t do audiblox with IM and I may actually stop VT for 2 weeks as well. I think it will just be 10 sessions so I could do 5 per week.

Audiblox can take 1 to 2 years. They say you see major gains in 6 weeks but it could even be shorter if you do it intensively. They have a plan of doing it several times a day which I may try.

My son even noticed an improvement with audiblox. His exact words were, “Tell all your friends to do audiblox with there kids it really helps.”

Now I sound like a commercial.

Linda,

It was the long time frame and the lack of AP that made me do PACE. But I think their approach works more on sequencing which at least then was paer of Nathan’s problems. I looked at their web site after posting. What so you think of their approach to reading? That is the only thing that seems wierd to me. I don’t know if such an approach would make my son’s issues better or worse. DEA did audioblox before PACE and said it encouraged her daughter’s guessing and that her decoding got much worse doing the program. Now her daughter, unlike our boys, is gifted visual spatially so not quite the same profile. I remember some hard core advocates arguing that she couldn’t have done it right. There is so little recognition that LD does not equal LD. What is magic to one child may not work for another.

Are you doing the regular program or the specially designed for you one? We have hit so many areas that I would think it might be worth it, although I couldn’t figure out how much it costs.

I just ordered the Rosner book you recommended. Do you think it overlaps Audioblox?

Don’t know if I can do another intensive program with my son—especially one for a year. I might order it though just to see it.

Beth

Hi Jan, we do hs too and I know what you mean about frustration as to how hard it is sometimes, a lot actually. A lady I know does a lot of oral work with her children because they are in advance of their written work and it keeps them interested. She dictates their “narrations” if you know what that is and even their math answers. I have read a lot of stuff about how these people work better “in their minds eye”.

Other things that have helped us are making a rhyme up silly as possible or putting it to music esp with X tables.

We do nature walks and my ds thrives in this on hard days these are great! I have had a lot of success and fun with helping him to learn to draw in a great method that I picked up from a book, it’s logical really it has helped him so much. So we do little drawings when we are out. It’s great to have such support as these above emails. I have also noticed that my ds needs time to take stuff in even weeks later he will finally understand it like it’s sunk in in time. Have you noticed this.

I believe that audiblox works for reading writing and math because it addresses the underlying issues that make these tasks so difficult, memory, sequencing, logic and reasoning etc..

I think these kids learn to read with the program because after attaining these skills they can learn the way “regular” kids learn. This is my own little theory. (A side note, I was all prepared to teach my 4 year old to read but it seems he is intent upon teaching himself, I guess he is regular)

I could see how it would be problematic for some and was put off by the methods they use at first.

The reading portion involves having the child look at words on cards for a split second then they have to say what the word was after it is taken away. It seems similar to sight word teaching but I did think it encouraged my son to visualize the word. He also had to process what he saw very quickly I don’t know if the point is to increase processing speed. My son is already a good decoder so I don’t know if it would encorage others to not decode. He just had to learn to decode very quickly through this method. Honestly though, it was my least favorite part of the program being the phonographix fan that I am.

We aren’t doing it now because of VT but I think I will do the customize program this summer because I want the greatest gains and we have done so much already I want to fill in the gaps. The vision therapist mentioned to me that my son’s tracking is “one of the worst they have ever seen.”

The Rosner book worked on one very specific area that was huge hurdle for my son. It might have been taken care of through audiblox as well I just don’t know. I think audiblox deals with some of the same issues but in a different way. It is hard to say.

I just bought the blocks and book. It cost $60. You can do alot with just those two things. I forget what the custom program cost but I remember thinking it was very cheap.

One other thing. You could do audiblox with your 6 year old as well. My little guy thinks it is a game, like checkers.
It is very easy to do with the little ones who don’t even know they are doing something to improve academics.

I am thinking of hiring a college student to do it 2-3 days a week with my son over the summer. I met a lovely girl at the park who is studying special ed at school.
It is pretty easy to do and I thought she might learn something as well that could help her in her career.

Thanks for all the information. I agree that it is probably the improvement in underlying skills that helps reading. I don’t think they address all the underlying skills though. I don’t think it addresses the auditory processing piece and so I suspect it isn’t the best program for the kids who that is the primary deficit (don’t I wish we could have aprimary deficit).

I do think rapid recognition of words is a good thing—I know the OD checked my son on that and said he was slow. He said it was speed of visual processing but really you have to integrate visual and auditory for reading. A kid with RAN issues would have trouble with that. Of course, it doesn’t substitute for a reading program.

Our Neuronet therapist has started my son on a new exercise that seems to be feeding into reading. He was reading Harry Potter to me yesterday and there were far less skips and miscalls than a week ago. We may get there yet.

I would def. go for customized program. You also have done a lot of work and probably just have holes at ths poitn.

Beth