I am dealing with a 12 year old boy who is doing real good in school but wants to be good in sports. He is on the track team but running is not his thing. We tried a lot of sports, like hockey, gymnastics, soccer, basketbal and more. A lot has to do with his motorskills. But we also tried swimming. That is something he can do, but at the meets, he is always too slow with the start.
He loves snowboarding and is not bad at all. But in compare with his buddies… For now he is fine with this, but I am scared for the High school snowboarders (one more year to go). Sailing is something he really can do and enjoys but it is not a populair sport in school. He is on the racing team. Nobody is from his school.
We all know not to compare with others. For children this doesn’t always work that way. To be accepted is very important. Are there any other parents dealing with this problem? Is there an age that they will accept the fact that not all people are sport “stars’ and that is has to do with fun?
I really like to hear from you.
Thanks.
Re: adhd and sports
Hah, Ihave an athletic boy as well and HATE that he gains notaariety just for that.
One kind of sport–– bowling. Maybe to geeky but worked for a friend! the kids league would get written up in the paper.
If he has the heart- cross country running can work sometimes. And the high school usually has a team.
LIZAnne
Re: adhd and sports
My 16 year is ADD and plays volleyball, both club (November through early July) and high school. He is not athletically gifted, but he makes up for it by playing smart and studying the game. He has made friends, traveled, learned life lessons more valuable than win/loss records. I would strongly encourage you to help him find something he enjoys doing, and help him pursue the challenges sports provides. There are plenty of ups and downs, but that’s life. What else can we give them than to learn perserverance?
Re: adhd and sports
Many people peak in high school. They are popular sports stars that have it all. It is interesting that the people like this that I went to high school with were not the ones who made it big in the real world.
The girl on the fringes became famous by writing a book, the non athlete guy I grudgingly went to the prom with (I really wanted the football start to ask) made millions in the market, oh and that football star is pretty average still living in my home town going to the same bars we went to in high school.
I hope that made you feel better.
Re: adhd and sports
My own son had the same problem and for boys it is particulary difficult I think not to be athletic. My son finally accepted - reluctantly - that he was not a sports star only in his senior year of high school and in college only played sports for fun. Now he scuba dives and finds a kind of athletic outlet in that without having to compete with others or feel he is not a good diver.
Good luck.
Re: adhd and sports
We had good luck with showing horses. There are alot of people showing horses including Professionals (Trainers) that have struggled with LD’s/ADHD.Showing horses can be as competitive as the child wants it to be.My own son left the school troubles behind every weekend when we went to shows and he was just another kid with a horse. There are some skills involved that can help educationally and it never hurts to have that 4 legged best friend who loves you, no matter what.
Re: Golf is also a possibility
I have a 16 year old (non ADD/LD). He wasn’t a bad athlete but he was too hypersensensitive for the competiveness of team sports. I forced him to take a 6 week basic golf course offered by our township. It just clicked with him. Even though it can be competitive, it is very much an individual sport. In fact, he liked it so much that for the first year or so, he played by himself. Fortunately, he began to play in high school and eventually made one or two good friends who loved the game also. Just another thought!
sincerely, Eileen
My 15 yr old strives for popularity-he is not ADD/LD(my 11 yr old is)
Sports do seem to be the ticket for that, above all else.
It has been his obsession since 6th grade, if not sooner. He is on the freshman baseball & soccer teams. He is quite talented but not overly big and we are not “in the in crowd” ourselves. So, the girls arent hanging on the fences telling him they love him but, yes, they do this for other boys on the team. 3-4 very good looking girls will literally drool and tell boys how good looking they are and that they love them. Soccer fans werent quite as gutsy but the rapture was there as well.
Sure, we can sit here and tell them “thats not the kind of girl you want anyway” but they are not going to believe it-and by golly, with my sons raging hormones those girls are EXACTLY what he wants right now!
I dont see an end in sight-SORRY!
My 11 and 18 yr old boys have never cared about popularity, and sports were just something to do. I do not quite know what makes the middle one so different. He does have the least selfconfidence of the three even though he is talented both academicly and athleticly-maybe he is close enough to the golden apple to want it whereas the other two never were????