misunderstood minds

You don’t. Something will have to give. I don’t really mean to say that you can’t. But it’s going to be really hard. Have you tried a child advocate? A friend of mine uses an advocate to do all the wrestling with the school system. Obviously, they will cost money, but maybe that could be covered somehow… or it just might make financial sense over homeschooling. Maybe, instead of hiring someone, you can just sit down with the principal and tell them you can’t manage to fight on all fronts anymore and that you need an advocate within the school… just to see what they say/do? Best of luck.

I KNOW IN THE STATE OF CALIFORNIA HAVE AN ORGANIZATION CALL THE REGIONAL CENTER FOR DISABLE CHILDREN AND ADULTS THE PROGRAMS IS FREE. I HAVE MY GRANDDAUGHTER WHO IS 5 YEARS OLD IS IN THIS PROGRAM ALSO THE SSI/SSA WILL PAY DISABILITY FOR THE CHILDREN BUT YOU MUST HAVE DOCTORS REPORTS AND SCHOOL REPORTS AND PYSOCOLOGIST MEDICAL REPORTS, PLEASE GET YOUR CHILDREN WITH A GOOD THERAPIST BUT FIRST SIGN THEM UP FOR SSI WITH THE SOCIAL SECURITY STATE DISABILITY PROGRAMS THEY WILL RECIEVE MEDICAL CARE FOR THESE SERVICES. DO NOT GIVE UP IF THEY TURN YOU DOWN KEEP FILING IF YOU NEED TO KNOW MORE WRITE TO MY E-MAIL. I KNOW ABOUT LOW FINANCE I MAKING ON $17,000.00 YEARLY AND IT IS 5 OF US, AND DOING THE BEST AS WE CAN.

My question for each of you is this, do you think IEP’s are effective in helping your children? Do you feel that teachers are making the accomodations that are necessary? Do you think the regular education teachers are trained enough to make the necessary accomodations in their classrooms?

What is the difference in your child(ren) when an IEP is not mandated?

I am interested in knowing a parent’s perspective.

I watched the PBS special, Misunderstood Minds. I was blown away by the statement that some states are planning the size of new prison construction based upon the number of children with learning disabilities in the 3rd and 4th grades. Talk about planned failure = it’s as if nothing matters, they’re going to become failures. I was so upset to learn this is happening. I refuse to let my son become a statistic.

I was really stirred up by the program about Misunderstood Minds also. I have 17 year old twins; one was diagnosed with ADHD when he was about 10 and one was “allowed” to enter special ed programs, I believe, when the state implemented proficiency testing. Our school district always gets the top scores in the area and of course, putting kids into special ed categories removes them from the statistics. This would be fine if I didn’t think that she was being basically warehoused and passed along. At this point I honestly don’t know if it is too late to do anything about it. Every avenue I have pursued in the past was a dead end. I have wondered if programs such as Lindamood Bell were effective for finding the keys to unlock special minds

I too watched the program and was outraged at the prison information. Stated simply, that is why we home school. We have made a huge financial sacrifice, not to mention the harassment on the part of our extended family. There is a great deal more at stake here then just grades - there’s self image, peer pressure, gangs etc. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not easy home schooling an LD child. And I have found that it does not come cheap. My son is seven years old and went to private preschool and kindergarten. I saw as early as preschool how cruel children can be, and how my child had already begun to be set apart from the mainstream children. My child has ADHD and CAPD. He was often referred to by some of the children in his kindergarten class as the bad boy in the class. My child is not agressive, but sweet. His main problem was social communication and sitting still. He was easily frustrated because he could not keep up with social give and take. He often talked off topic and the children responded with giggles. He began to realize then that he was different. I was afraid of what would come later when the giggles turn to teasing and mistreatment. Children cope in different ways, especially when there is no”on the spot” guidance. The great thing about home schooling is that you get to be a coach every day even in social settings. My goal is to give my son the skills needed to blend into a mainstream school some day. But that day is a long way into the future. If I had to put my child into school, I would be there every day for at least part of the day. I know it’s not easy. I have only one child to deal with. I’m not sure what my path would be if I had other children to consider. Good luck to all!!!!!!!!

Lynette:

NO, I don’t feel that IEP’s are effective! MAYBE, only to categorize your child (I sure don’t like to be categorized!) So may EC teachers don’t follow the IEP, and then make excuses to the parent when they are caught!

As far as the teachers ability to handle the classroom training - again - NO!! Not when the Dept of Education requires that the child gets so much support, and then has to go to the classroom where he/she is expected to work at that grade level! In the meantime - the teachers subconsciously label the child ADHD and recommend that you go to a doctor and have him tested. They tried to do that in an IEP. I had to remind them that he is being pushed to work at least 3 grades above his ability - has peer pressure, and gets frustrated. What would you do if you were placed in a class of Nuclear Physicists?

The system does not work - the teachers are all trained to “teach” per protocol - who knows what would happen to them if they chose to “buck the system”

It’s often not a question of bucking the system. It’s a question of who to teach. If your kid is in there with those “nuclear physicists” the teacher has to decide which kids to reach.
If a teacher is good with the challenging kids, s/he generally gets more of them and more responsibilities. Then s/he burns out quickly.

you know- just check out the web site (and bull boards) for LMB, goto the LMB web site, and GOOD LUCK!

hear!hear! your son will not be a statistic and neither will my child!
you must educate yourself, be an advocate for your kid (the state where i live has a state sponsored adovacacy program for LD kids, but as my cynical lawyer friend reminded me- the state provides the “service” toprotect state interests, not your childs)

good luck!

I have been reading all the email replies and realize we have just entered a long journey . My children ages 10 and 7 fall into a sad catagory that we have come to realize they will not “grow out of” or ” catch up”. My children have been “slightly” behind since starting school and have been tested both by the school and by private physicians with the same results. Behind enough to be behind not enough to even qualify for an IEP. Processing Disorders is the official word, anyone with any info would be much appreciated if they could help with next possible steps, unfortunately looks like we as a family are on our own with this… to all thanks for knowing there are others to share in the insanity of public schools and daily struggles.

I watched the show misunderstood minds along with my 11 year old son who is learning disabled. He was very much interseted in the show and seeing what happened to the kids that were profiled.
Do I think teachers do a good job of following IEP’s and accommodating these students. DEFINITELY NOT. I have to write a note to his teachers before every test he has to make sure the IEP is followed. Teachers don’t have a clue as to how to teach and reach these students. Thank God I have a wonderful tutor for my son who has brought his reading above grade level and is working on his writing skills which are way below grade level. I think teachers should be mandated to attend continuing ed courses and special ed courses to be better able to help these kids. Teachers play such a big role in a child’s life and really need to be able to accommodate and make the necessary modifications in their education for them to succeed.

I totally agree with Diana M. I could not BELIEVE my ears when I heard how a community decides the sze of a prison!! Talk about planning to fail!!
I also refuse to let my children become a statistic and I did not birth any future criminals.. My oldest son (age 7) has CAPD is having a tough time in school, especially with handwiring, and math is a nightmare. We finally got the IEP and I am already praying for his teacher for next year. (Those of you who have been there know why!) This board is quite informative; it helps to know that my family and I not alone and can read about possible solution(s) to our situation.

I also feel IEP’s are worthless. In my son’s case, we have things put in an IEP, but I have to fight all year to get these things done. So, as I’m sure you all know, I have quite a reputation at the school. I too, refuse to let my son be beat down by the school system, but it’s an everyday struggle. We are constantly reminding him of how good he is at some things and then he goes to school and they are constantly reminding him of how good he isn’t at some things. If only they would learn a little bit of praise would go along way. I get so frustrated!
If it wasn’t for embarrassing him, I would consider chaining myself to the flagpole at his school and inviting all the media, to draw some attention. LOL He would die of embarrassment.
But what do you do?

Kathytoo -

Where do you live? I would GLADLY join you chained to that flagpole, and I know MANY others that would join us!! I honestly don’t think notifying the media of our children’s dilemna would be a mistake! In fact, it might get more POSITIVE attention than we would expect.

After going for sooooooo many years without anyone to turn to, it’s great to have someone else to turn to - someone who has been there! How many other parents are “lost” in the system? It wouldn’t hurt to make yourself known!

We just moved & put our son in a new school. In a 5-minute conversation with his regular classroom teacher, she asked me 3 times if he was on medication. Each time I said no - she asked why, and was told (by me), that the doctors feel that he is not a candidate for drugs. Last week, she had the nerve to tell me that all EC children are the same, and that she knows how to handle my son. Needless to say, it has already been arranged that NEXT year’s IEP will be scheduled and enforced by the Board of Education, EC Dept..

As far as what you do … . . do whatever it takes: keep going over heads, fight, fight. BE AGRESSIVE!! Don;’t worry about what people think or say - you don’t need to be liked or popular, just strong & well-informed! AND MOST OF ALL - DON’T GIVE UP!!

Kathytoo - I’ll join in on the flagpole chain. Even though we home school now, I always wanted to get in touch with all the other parents who attended IEP/504 meetings. In our county it is the same two days of the week. What about if we do it those designated days. Just kidding. I’ve passed a few LD parents on my way in and out of countless meetings. I’ve initiated conversation and offered assistance as to where to go for student advocates and LD help. Also, how to stay calm and focussed while in the meeting with administrators, teachers, school pyschologists and counselors. Just to know their children are not the only ones. And interestingly, the same excuses are used by these “experts” from one meeting to the next - different medication, diet, sleep, family/home life. But don’t suggest that the school or administrators should try something different or that maybe what’s on paper isn’t being followed. Feathers definately ruffle. I know from experience.

The IEP’s are inconsistent from on year to the next and at the middle and high school level, implementation is lip service.There are some great, caring compassionate teachers out there; our school’s special services coordinator is wonderfull. That said, the system is overburdened; the “regular” teachers lack the time, resources and general knowledge of LD to make “reasonable” accomodations. Having read Levine’s Neurodevelopmental Variations and Learning Disabiltiy, I do my best to be non-confrontational and explain Michael cannot take notes, (dysgraphia) and really absorb the lecture at the same time; he needs to have notes provided. Lost cause in most cases, dooming kids to failure. Then there are the teachers who insist he write out the question and a complete answer, in sentence form…takes forever to answer one question. So, they end up sticking LD kids in classes with kids who function way below grade level, (my son is learning the same history and science he had in middle school) and kids begin to identify themselves as dumb…because they’re treated as if they are. At a recent school district meeting, I asked the Person in Charge of spec. ed. how the district proposed to assist and educate “regular” teachers who must make accomdations….she was completely nonplussed…”the information is available to them”, was her shaky response. I might add, I got quite a round of applause from the audience…and heard quite a few horror stories afterward. I have no hope for nor faith in the system. It is designed to educate only those who “fit in”, inadequate accomdations are made and then kids are pretty much blamed for their own predicament. We did not have the same experience in grammar school…although the first “resource” teacher was a nightmare….the remaining years were pretty good,…of course, Michael was only resourced for math in grammar school. Because of the dysgrahpia and inability to get anything in writing quickly, middle school was hell…dumbed down, and on more than one occasion, beaten up, by fellow “resource” students whose problems were other than LD. Guess I’ll get off my soapbox now. By the way, I have 3 grown daughters who are not LD…what an eye-opener this has been. My child is well behaved and bright; albeit anxious at school…an appropriate response to years of being treated like who he is isn’t quite good enough. The only reason he’s survived is Mom went through the sixties and knows enough to question authority and cherish the person Michael is….

Ms. Barb,
As a LD teacher continously searching for answers for my students as well as their parents to make their life easier, I suggest searching a learning technique called BrainGym. You can go to yahoo or yahooligan and type in Brain Gym. I have had good results from Brain Gym. There is a book titled “The Dominance Factor” and there is a series of test (very easy) that helps you to know the learning style of your child so that you can reach them at their level.

Some people have the tendency of thinking that each child learns the same but as teachers we have to readjust and reteach for the child and not expect the child to readjust for us.

Brain Gym explains your child’s weakness and strengths. It also give you activities that you can do to help your child learn in the areas of: math, writing, reading, behavior, and even just to relax their mind (yours too!).

I don’t what state you reside in but if your child or children have been tested and qualify for specific learning disabled (ld) then you may be entitled to monies so that you can purchase Brain Gym books and materials. I advise you to check with the Social Security in your city. Maybe ask your child’s EC teacher if she/he is a reliable resource.

Also you mentioned that LD may run in the family. The most that you as a parent can do for your children is give them a schedule to follow. The biggest characterist of LD children and adults is unorganization. It helps them to have structure and organization.

Good Luck!

Ready to hang myself from the flagpole if I thought it would do any good LOL.

8 years and still fighting!

Homeschool on 35,000 you don’t! Not if you need to eat and pay the morgage!

I know what you mean about giving up and homeschooling on a budget…been their tryed that on 30,000 a year. Realised really quick (2 months!) I couldn’t teach with a thrown together program from all the information I reasearched and found and that I needed curriculum, Not a hit an miss program of what I could find in books or online! Whats worse I needed speciallized curriculum!
Most of these programs for my child are pay for the tutor types running mega bucks. Or you have to be a certified teacher and take the training to get the program. I found a few that will teach a parent to teach the child with the curriculum as well. I can’t afford it iether! There is one homeschooling support for my sons LD….the cost way beyond my means.

The problem of homeschooling a LD child hits when you realize the child needs the program you can not afford. So you are forced back into the system because now you know you can’t teach them what they need because you lack the training and the specialized curriculum you need! And you end up back in the system fighting for the program he should have gotten from the beagaining! In my state a child has to meet certain standards educational standards to homeschool…He was functioning lower than that when he left to homeschool! RUT RO!

Thats where I’m at I know what he needs…how do I pay for it? I am fighting to get a MFE, to get a diagnosis to get a program outside the system because the system doesn’t have the program and I can not afford the program!

Getting a diagnosis is hard with a LD child thats also gifted! The testing has to be set up a certain way or the two can cancil out, the testing has to be really complete or you get no services. The child gets nothing!

I am fighting right now to get a due process hearing officer! Because I can’t even get the school to run a decent MFE! They want me to pay for a physical!
I can’t get things like school records, A hearing officer list, A school statment about the testing they want to do just to be able to make a informed desition to consent to test. My childs had bogus incomplete MFE’s before! And the result is a bad IEP! With nothing that does any good! You end up signing only because it is that or nothing and you basically end up in a fight for school survival like a guppy in a shark tank!

I have learned about Proper MFE’s now and they want to use a teacher observation form when my kids been out of a classroom and has had no classroom for over 9 months now! They asked me to fill this teacher observation form too!

No consent…no testing, No diagnosis, no IEP, no services! I can’t even get the records of the test I concented to and they ran 9 months ago that diagnosed him as dygraphic! I ended up with a special ed teacher…But no program at all. His teacher has nothing to teach him with and I haven’t heard from her in 5 months now. My son is truent and has never even been reported as truent. I called him in as truent to the court system who tells me that untill the school reports him they can not do anything. I called childerns social services to report the problem…they claimed they would investigate….never heard back from them! Lets see we are on teacher #4 in 2 years!

So now I am fighting to get a hearing officer out of the state! They want me to resubmit the all the request again to the superentandant. The state office for procedural safegaurds admitts the superentandant never sent in a request for hearing officers. They want to give him a second chance! Then if he doesn’t respond mail in profe he never responded and a request for the hearing officer to them and they will send me a list! My son Isn’t even getting a regular classroom curriclum and is truent! He doesn’t even get the services for regular ed- students!

I tryed leagal aid to get a lawer..they don’t do education problems…only criminals like DUI’s.I have searched and tryed to get a advocate for him so I do not have to do this alone! Not much gained!

How many hoops do you have to jump thru before you actually get one dang thing acomplished….At this rate my son will be over 30 before he gets any education out of the state! In the mean time I reaserch my butt off In advocacy, special ed law, special ed programs, and try to teach when I have time left over from battleing the system to teach! Most times wadding thru this is so stressfull. You don’t mess trying to teach…it’s hard to teach a bright child whos LD when your always so fusterated!

Same boat, different river in a differnet location, No oars and sets of rapids that upsets the boat. You feel like giving up and drowning but you climb back in the boat……..day after day ,week after week, year after year!

The end will be when I decide to go over the waterfall and end up robbing a bank to finance his education!