Hi, I'm new.

you did the right thing, you have to be a bit** to get stuff doen for people with L.D. and A.D.D. The only advice I have for you is not to believe what teachers say and what the Dr’s. say, your the mom and you know whats right for her. I was her a long time ago and now I spend my time writting so people with any disability can know that they can do anything. As you can see by my spelling the I too have this.

Hi! I’m new to L.D. as well, but not from a parent perspective, but as a teacher. My background is in Mental Retardation. I have a Bachelor’s and a Master’s. I also have a Specialist in Early Childhood. I am taking L.D. classes for inter-related certification. However, as much as I know and have learned I am learning more everyday with each child.
I hate that you seem to be having so much problem with your school system. I would love to have the opportunity to work with parents that are concerned about their childs’ special education services and are willing to work the teachers. It would often save me a lot of time because you know so much more about your child; learning style, motivators, dislikes, etc. The only way I learn these things in the classroom is by trial and error. Also, I feel strongly that any child’s education is a partnership between the parents and the teacher. It is my job to give you the results that you expect within in reason.
Please don’t lump all teachers into one category and come in expecting the worst. Most of us really try to do everything we can and sometimes we are bound by the school system too and end up having to do things that we don’t feel are in the best interest of the children.

Me too!
Looking for answers of where to turn to find help with assesment of a 4th grader who has struggled since kg! Last spring “failed” math but was “tutored” through the summer by the school (private) and passed “the test” to move to 4th grade. Something must be done! Any thing anyone can offer will be appreciated. Need to know who to call, what to say, what to demand, and how to get through to the right person. I have a grown child who was on the other end of the spectrum, so I’m totally lost. This child shows signs of something, one of everthing I have read about on this site! One day she can do math and the next day you would think it was calc! She will do one problem and not be able to do the next. The class may be working together, by the time she finds the right section on the page, they are finished working together and she has missed the instruction ( this is a guess on my part for some of the reason for not completing work the teacher notes as “worked together in class” our paper is empty! Hand writing is below level ( I think) and sentence structure is not at level. Some sentences will stop mid point and she will go on to the next question. One section is thinking and writing. This gives all the words you need to make a sentence however, they are mixed up. If they are simple thoughts she may be able to do them, otherwise blank stares at a sheet of paper now spoted by tears. Her father feels she is not “trying” I feel she can’t try. Her speach can be confusing due to poor sentence structure but more often, she fails to complete the thought it just won’t come out. I think I have convinced her dad to seek help. I’m only a step so I can’t just take charge, which is my normal M O ! If you have anything to offer it will be much appreciated.
Sandi

I found this site today and just cried as I started reading all of the information. I had to leave the kids with my husband last night and get out and walk, walk, walk, and vent with a friends last night. I was desparate for help. I think I’ll be visiting this site a lot. I have been craving information and ideas.

Keep up the good work out there. Our kids can do great things, they just need help finding their own way of doing them.

- Lisa

You will find this to be a very useful site although once in a while we do get off topic. Another good site is the Schwab Learning - Connecting with Others which is a “mom to mom” chat line.

Hi, I read Sandi’s post and I see my son. He’s 14 now and is failing miserably at school. For years now I have been asking the schools for help, saying he just doesn’t seem to be comprehending all the information each year. His handwritting is terrible, he seems to hate to read. He can’t get his thoughts together to write a paper so he just doesn’t turn things in. He totally disorganized (no matter how many time I organize him) We have struggled with homework since he began school (screaming, crying, and nashing of teeth) and he has barely squeeked by every year. He genuinely seems to want to do well but just doesn’t seem to get it. I am at my wits end. I have encouraged him to do better with positive reinforcements and use negative reinforcements, taking things away and grounded him. I am at a loss. He did have an evaulation in the 3rd grade but they found nothing (school evaluation). Above average IQ ,no learning disabilities according to them. They call him lazy.. I just can’t see it and I don’t know what to do. I know my son, I just don’t know how to help him anymore. I know something is wrong. Advice is truely appreciated!!

LIZ,
I too knew that somethhing was not right since preschool. 4yrs old in district school. Then kdg also. Demanded testing(not in writing). Got team meeting .Results, no problem,again. Is there problems at home,etc. First grade ,demanded in writing .Tested . C.E.R.evaluation Twenty seven point difference in verbal scale 101. performance 74.Came back no need for specialized education .Learned more and went in and asked better questions.Disagreed with report . Retested 2 months later Diagnosed Nonverbal learning Disability. Finally they see something.Suggested pull out Math and Reading .Disagreed and said full specials.She’ll be able to catch up.She is so far behind .2 nd grade full specials with inclusion for specials(gym, library,etc.)Mind you no accomodations to go with it .Mid 2nd grade getting furter behind .Went to very respected Children’s Hospital in area for Neuropsychological report (16 pages long) Very indepth based on the schools original testing and going more in depth into individual areas.I read everything I could about it .Boy, did I learn what they were not doing.You would now think in Third grade specials I would be reporting great news. I only wish I could.Continueing to get further behind .Her needs are not being met .You see first the I.E.P. has to reflect her strenghts and weaknesses and address her needs .Then they have to meet her needs.Now we play the I.E.P. game .Well they are unwilling to develop a propper I . E. P. to do just that ,because then they would have to follow it by law and if they didn’t follow it I could then prove she is being Denied a free appropriate public education .They said she was lazy too .I cry over my misplaced trust in the experts at school . At my daughter’s expence . Who continue to do whats best for the budget not my daughter . No more! I have an advocate who knows the laws ,and is fighting for my daughter . Wish us luck .Sometimes its not even about money.I had to carry on like a mad woman to get her a desk and chair that fit her size.She is 4’11 and 150lbs.She was getting in trouble for not sitting properly at her desk. .Instead of raising her desk , they gave her a smaller chair. It would not accomodate my butt,which is smaller .Very uncomfortable.Two months for a propper chair and desk .So Get your own testing done.Find out how his mind works and then you can see how to help your son. Don’t stop till you get your answers.You are your childs only hope. It’s an uphill battle ,but dont get discouraged .You must prevail .For your son!Your in my prayers T.Q.

I agree with you, as my husband is an extremely caring 28-year veteran of the teaching profession, that all teachers should not be lumped together in a cynical fashion when discussing the problems we have getting appropriate services for our children. We have three sons, one of whom (at least) has a learning disability.

After having been through this, kind of on both sides of the issue, however, I definitely think you have to go into the process very informed. The reality is that the school districts often misrepresent (lie) information regarding the services they will or will not provide. Our issues have mainly been with administrative personnel, not direct service personnel (most of whom, you are right to say, are very caring). But one must never assume that any school district has their child’s best interest at heart. Only the parent (hopefully) can say that for sure.

I would also hasten to say that I would never hesitate to pull one of our boys out of a class where we consider the teacher to be mediocre, at best. Sadly, there are many of these teachers around, too, for whatever reason. My husband teaches in a building where at least one-third of the teachers are mediocre and disreputable, mostly because the administration allows many of them to continue on that way.

We do our research every year, and find out who has the finest reputation for being a committed teacher (not necessarily the PTA’s choice for Teacher of the Year, I might add), and absolutely insist that our child have that teacher. We always have to wade through the “I take no requests” crap from the principals, which we manage handily. We realize that someone’s child, unfortunately, has to have that mediocre or incompetent teacher, but we can only be responsible, ultimately, for our own children, and they should not have to suffer or get less of an education that they deserve just because some other parents didn’t “do their homework”.

I also make sure that my children’s teachers know they can absolutely count on me for total support. I also give one afternoon per week, despite the fact that I now work full-time, to help teachers in any way they need it. Sometimes I file, sometimes I work with small groups of students - whatever. We also give a competent teacher the “benefit of the doubt” in any situation that comes up with the children, at least until we speak with the teacher. We NEVER say, “My child would never…”

I applaud your commitment to the fine profession of teaching.

I suggust you get him tested by a doctor liz. The first person I would go to about him would be a psycologist and might I add that the school psycologists are not real psycologists.