Please help... I am not sure if my DD is learning disabled..

it can be hard working with young people who are not who you think they should be. Just remember who your daughter is. keep the directions simple and to the point. Many young children today are “learning disabled” all that really means in the end for a home schooling family is you need to find a new way to approach your child. She is not learning disabled, she just has “learning Differences”. I am sure it is hard for you but if you have choosen to homeschool then you obviously have your childs best interest at heart. Work with a reward system for when she completes her work list and chores and when she ” forgets” keep using gentle reminders. I have found, most children who say ” I forgot” really didn’t they just did not want to complete the task. Don’t let this one slide. She is to smart to have forgotten completly. Sure she can get side tracked easily but so do many adults. be kind and gentle with her reminders and trust that she is o.k.

[quote=”needinganswers”]:( I have an eleven year old DD who is getting to the point where we feel like we are losing our minds. I truly believe that she has a learning or other disability that she has yet been diagnosed with. Her bioliogical father did drugs when I got pregnant with her but i am not certain if that can have an effect on her.

She has the following symptoms…

- she is unable to follow simple instructions
- if she is given too many instructions at once, she becomes flustered and panicky
- she keeps her room clean and organized and does neat school work, however, when she was in school she was always forgetting her assignments, trying to avoid doing certain assignments, and forgetting her homework at school
- she doesnt show her feelings/emotions
- she will be standing right in front of you while you are talking with her but she wont be paying attention
- she is smart, but always forgetful
- she will be doing one thing such as putting away laundry, but she will almost always only do the chore halfway and then claim that she “forgot” to do the rest
- she is easily overwhelmed
- she cant remember her phone number and address at our new home and we have been living her for 5 months
- she can sometimes go from calm to bouncing off the walls yet she is never a problem in terms of good behaviour… she never mouths us off or causes problems - she is usually very quiet except for those rare moments where she is hyper and even then she stops when asked to.
- she lives in a “fairy tale land”
- when she is in trouble for something, she acts as though she doesnt know why she is in trouble and despite consequences for her actions she still does the same things wrong day after day (ie she has a written list of chores that she is to do in the morning before we start school but she still doesnt ever do the entire list)
- She chews her finger nails and cuticles (until her cuticles are bleeding) and has recently started to blink her eyes repeatedly and squint alot.
- she is sometimes nervous and flinches when someone makes a quick movement near her… even though we dont spank or hit our children EVER. Its like she thinks that we are going to smack her which upsets us greatly. If you throw a ball at her gently, she will put her arms up around her head like its going to hit her rather than catching it.

There are other things as well… when she was born and up until she was around 6 she used to have hand shakes that were terrible. We had her tested for just about everything imaginable, but everything came back negative. She has had to learn to control her hand tremours - although they do still come back if she is scared, tired or too excited.

I want to have her tested but I am afraid to because we just got out of a situation where child protective services where involved because we were homeschooling and although we are living in a new city, we are terrified that getting her tested may raise concerns about the fact that we are homeschooling… this may sound paranoid but that is a battle that we would rather not fight again even though we know that we arent doing anything wrong.

I am scared for my child… if she has problems I want to get her some help because right now we are looking at her like she is doing these things on purpose and I believe in my heart that there is more to this than just behaviours. She was a smart baby and toddler: she was crawling at 6 months, walking at 9.5 and talking at 10. She was speaking in full sentances when she was 1.5 years old. She could count to 10 when she was just over a year old, but she couldnt read or recognize her ABC’s until grade one. She could do simple math in her head when she was 3. I am totally at a loss as to what to do or how to determine what/any disabilities she may have. Any help would be appreciated.
:cry:
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What I would do is start with basic evaluations: (1) a CAPD eval to find out if she has auditory processing problems, (2) a developmental vision eval to find out if she has vision delays, and (3) an occupational therapy eval which includes assessment of sensory integration.

These are all basic evaluations that are *not* standard, and that you have to seek out. Nobody needs to know you are getting these evaluations, except perhaps your physician if referrals will get them covered under your medical insurance (developmental vision evaluations are usually not covered, although the acuity portion of the exam usually is). Many LD’s involve deficits in one or more of the basic sensory areas: auditory processing, visual processing, and motor development/integration. At the very least, it is a good idea to rule all of these problems out.

When major sensory issues have been either ruled out or addressed, cognitive training is often very helpful for developing attention and other skills. PACE and Audiblox are the two programs most commonly used.

If the prior approaches are not sufficient, then you may need to look into medical testing for ADD/ADHD. For this you need to find the very best specialist you can. I leave this until last because ADD can be next to impossible to diagnose accurately unless sensory-level and cognitive-level problems have already been ruled out.

Take it one step at a time.

Nancy

One more thing. You may want to read up on non-verbal learning disability to see if your daughter fits that profile. Often NLD kids are not “different” enough to get attention until they are older. NLD kids have great difficulty understanding cause-and-effect, anxiety, etc.

Websites with information are http://www.nldline.com and http://www.nldontheweb.org

Nancy

As you are in a new city, have you found your way to other homeschooling families yet? That’s very important. You need some help and some support as a homeschooling family. Do a search on the Internet for the homeschooling organizations in your new city or search through your church. Whereever there are families, there are homeschooling families and they can be a valuable resource for you.

The first thing they can tell you is the name of a doctor or psychologist who is friendly to homeschooling families as clearly you need to have your daughter tested. Do you have a new family doctor yet?

From your description of your daughter, I would be surprised if the testing shows nothing. And your statement that you feel as if you’re going out of your mind is a red flag that something’s up somewhere and you need to find out what it is.

In the meantime, shorten her list of chores. It does sound as if she has a shorter attention span than she might. Chewing her nails till they bleed is a sign of great nervousness and stress. I’d lighten her load a bit to see if that helps her to be more successful with her tasks.

Good luck.

I think I’d start with a good medical exam. There are symptoms there of possible anxiety, or ADD. The hand shaking and blinking could be some kind of tics. You definitely need to take her to the doctor first. A developmental pediatrician would be best. She could have auditory processing problems a or a weakness in working memory. I think I’d shorten the chore list, too. And make a chart where she has to check off each thing she completes. That way, she can’t forget. I’d try to reduce the stress right now as much as possible. Maybe she hasn’t adjusted to the move, too.

Janis