just-turned-14-year-old is a high school Freshman this year and is not doing well in most of his classes. It’s really difficult to determine what the problem is because one teacher (Art) has no problems with behavior but says his classroom work is incomplete. Another teacher (Algebra) says he work’s very well in class but does not consistently turn in homework. Another teacher (English) says he falls asleep in her class and she has to remind him every day to take out his paper and pen to begin working. Yet another teacher (health) has trouble with him goofing off with a buddy and incomplete work. This all adds up to basically failure in most of his classes.
My son has a high average IQ yet is in Spec Ed classes for his academics because of his low grades last year. So, if he is failing in Spec Ed classes, where is there left to go?
We are feeling at a real loss here in terms of what to do to help him when he just doesn’t seem to be want to get with the program. At least once a week he “turns over a new leaf”, but that is usually only when he wants to do something like sleep over at a friend’s house and knows it depends on how his school week goes.
Any advice?
have you had him checked for ADD-Inattentive?
Everything you have described is indicative of ADD-Inattentive behaviors. Both of my son’s were like your son…We found out that they were both inattentive one in high school when he was failing as a freshman, and the other in College when he ended up on Academic probation and was failing classes…he too was gifted and since they have been on meds it has been unbelieveable the change in their attitude and success.
My oldest son in high school was very gifted in art but he too wouldn’t turn things in on time. He missed deadlines consistently, he was a cram artist and the second son is very smart too and when he procrastinated he would fall apart get stressed out and then shut down. Once we did some behavior modification and meds, he really blossomed.
My 14 year old daughter is also ADHD and she has been on Concerta for 4 years. Now she is doing Waterpolo as a freshman in high school and that been a blessing. She is still struggling in school but she is shining in waterpolo and learning to be more disciplined. On a side note…Her Doctor’s son is also ADHD and does Waterpolo too. Her Doctor was so positive when he heard she was in waterpolo as it has helped his son too.
Hopefully your son can find something he is good at and stick to it. But he made need more support from a peer/coach/counselor or meds in order to be successful.
Have you considered a Gifted Program?
If you son’s IQ identifies him as ‘gifted’ (depends on school cutoff - usually 130 IQ and up), he may not be in a type of school program that is interesting enough to keep him on task or challenge him.
Sometimes gifted kids have the same symptoms of ADHD kids when they are not in the appropriate learning environments.
Does you son take medication to help keep him on task? It has helped my son a whole lot to have medication.
achieving success in school
Has your son ever been tested? Does he have an IEP or are any accomodations made for him? How is his attention span?
If not, testing would be a good step to figure out why he’s having trouble in his classes. Till then, what does he want to do with life? What does he say when you ask him that?
In my state, students who are 14 can leave school if they do farm work and I thought seriously about taking my own son out of school - he hated it - at 14 and putting him to work on the old family farm.
If that doesn’t work for you, what would happen if you got more involved with his nightly work? Would he accept help? What’s the inside of his backpack and his binders look like? Sometimes extreme disorganization made school success impossible.
And have you conferenced with these teachers? Why doesn’t he turn in his homework in algebra? Has he done it? No 14 year old can turn over a new leaf by themself. Consider sitting down with him every night or finding someone whose help he’ll accept as a homework support person. He can’t possibly feel good about the tremendous lack of success he’s having.
It sounds like incomplete work is his biggest problem. Ask the teachers to e-mail you the weekly assignments so together you can see the work done to completion.
Good luck.
Re: achieving success in school
[quote=”Sara”]Has your son ever been tested? Does he have an IEP or are any accomodations made for him? How is his attention span?
If not, testing would be a good step to figure out why he’s having trouble in his classes. Till then, what does he want to do with life? What does he say when you ask him that?
In my state, students who are 14 can leave school if they do farm work and I thought seriously about taking my own son out of school - he hated it - at 14 and putting him to work on the old family farm.
If that doesn’t work for you, what would happen if you got more involved with his nightly work? Would he accept help? What’s the inside of his backpack and his binders look like? Sometimes extreme disorganization made school success impossible.
And have you conferenced with these teachers? Why doesn’t he turn in his homework in algebra? Has he done it? No 14 year old can turn over a new leaf by themself. Consider sitting down with him every night or finding someone whose help he’ll accept as a homework support person. He can’t possibly feel good about the tremendous lack of success he’s having.
It sounds like incomplete work is his biggest problem. Ask the teachers to e-mail you the weekly assignments so together you can see the work done to completion.
Good luck.[/quote]
Sara when you say that you are suprised that they would put a child in special ed, dueto low grades. Respectfully I am saying to you that this happens more often than we would like to see.
Polly3k
when they tested your son’s IQ, what else did they find out about your son? What diagnosis or learning difference was he thought to have? I’d be surprised that a school would place a student in special education simply for low grades.
The descriptions the teachers are giving you of your son would suggest to me he might have some attentional issues - perhaps what they call ADD. That could be explored but even without that, some extra support might do the trick as well.
Could someone sit down with him at night and make sure he completes his algebra homework? Is there an after school homework program? He’s doing well in class - to fail a class because of homework alone should be able to be helped.
Once the English teacher reminds him to get to work, does he? To me it sounds as if he could benefit with some more structure. How many students are in his classes? Why do his teachers let him ‘goof off with his buddy” anyway?
With a high average IQ, it’s also true he might be bored in special ed. But as long as he’s there with some support, he should be able to pull up his grades. Ask the teachers to bundle up his incomplete work and to keep you in the loop. I sat down with my own son every night even through his senior year as without that structure, his work would likely have been incomplete too.
I’d ask his teachers if he understands the concepts he’s being taught. If he does, they shouldn’t allow him to fail just because he’s distractible and/or bored in class.