Why is it so hard?

Hi

Sounds like today you are having my yesterday. Some days are really rough. Today he got up and was wonderful. Most days are not that easy. I just stop and think this is driving me crazy but what would I do with out him. I also tell myself it could be worse I always try to look at the bright side of this. I am really loving this time change he thinks it is bed time around 7 because it is so dark out. I know this is mean but I am not telling him the truth if he really wants to go to sleep amen!

Have a great day.

Michele

Thanks Michelle for your caring and understanding. It is harder some days than others. I got an email from a dear friend with the following prayer

This morning when I awakened and saw the sun above, I softly said “Good morning Lord, Bless everyone I love.” And right away I thought of you and said a loving prayer, That he would bless you specially and keep you free from care. I thought of all the happiness a day could hold in store. I wished it all for you because no one deserves it more.

AMEN! :lol:

There’s nothing wrong with you. Some kids are just tough. I consider myself a fantastic parent and I still struggle with my youngest (7). He is bright, self-possessed, strong willed, and creative. These are all great qualities in an adult, but it makes our days much more inconvenient that it was with our second (the “mail-order child”, as I liked to call him). Still, that goal directed passion can be incredibly fun to watch and build on. Look for the good spots, think long term, and don’t take it personally. These kids are the creative folks that bring about change and growth in our society. Such growth is never smooth and convenient. That’s why we need our challenging kids!

Good luck - you’ll get there!

–- Steve

My six year old is my challenging one. Friday I got a conduct report—all 3s (as bad as it gets) stapled to a stack of papers—all 100s. Spoke to the teacher who gave me a long litany of all the things my ds doesn’t do—wait in line, not swing his lunch box, talk, climb under his desk for his constantly dropped eraser, stay on task, ect. Then later I watched him play soccer. He is a super soccer player because of the same “bull in a china closet” mentality that gets him in trouble at school.

Anyway, you aren’t alone. My mom has been telling me next year will be easier since my son was 10 months old!!!

Beth

I would consider giving him a list of what he needs to do to get ready in the AM and give him a timer. Try to understand how his brain works. My child has a short-term memory problem so she can’t follow multi-step commands. If you write it down, she can follow. She also likes to beat the timer.

First, there’s NO normal. The sooner you lose that ideal and stop lamenting it’s absence, the sooner you’ll begin to see all the blessings your unique son brings to your already blessed life.

A sixth of the world is starving to death.
Millions have AIDS.
Millions have other incurable (or not getting cured) diseases.
Millions are homeless.
Millions are refugees.
Millions are caught in wars.
Millions are drug addicts.
Millions are alcoholics.
Millions are trapped in other addictions.
Millions are abused, physically, mentally and emotionally.
Millions are in prison.
Millions are contemplating suicide.
Millions have limbs missing.
Millions are blind.
Millions are in wheel chairs.
Millions are chronically obese.
Millions suffer from mental illness.
Millions are bulimic.
Billions are not happy with their lot in life.

Which “normal” were you looking for?

I love every abnormal hop, skip, jump and fidget my really happy and talented son produces. He not normal, thank God!

Are you telling mt you never had one of those days ever? I know I am blessed. I know the hardship others go through but I just had a day. A day where I wished he was like every other kid and did things the first time or even the second. And I know there are otheres who have had those days.

Steve,

Couldn’t help but notice you writing a lot of BS on the Ritalindeath.com forums. Shame on you. Some of your posts were more twisted than the website itself. That kind of propoganda is for the small minded and ignorant. So is some of your thinking. Not everyone is fooled by you, now even less will be.
Shame shame shame. Boing Boing Boing.

Couldn’t help noticing your own shameful behavior. You don’t even appear to have the courage to identify yourself in your hostile attacks. “Ball” would be proud of you!

If you have nothing positive to say, please remove yourself from the board.

By the way, Brian, I loved your post! It really captures my feeling about my children. You should make a poem about it!

Thanks for sharing!

Steve,

You’re welcome!

Jentasboy,

Of course you will have days and so will all of us. My point was that expressing your feelings about having a “day” here, is somewhat redundant and generally doesn’t help.

Also, again, this “kid” doesn’t exist and it would be a sadder, greyer world if he did.

“A day where I wished he was like every other kid…”

Vive la differance! (sp?)

We all ask those questions. Why me? Why him? What did I do wrong?

Many people who have been visited with challenges in their lives have done nothing wrong. There are challenges that come to us. A very religious friend of mine whose child is severely retarded believes God gave her this child as no one else would care for the child as well as does she. That comforts her greatly.

Mathematicians spout statistics at us and say it has to be somebody.

I try to think of ways to make it better. Can anyone else help out in the morning? An extra pair of hands even once in while can feel like a difference. You don’t say what exactly it is your child does - there may be some ways to help the mornings go more smoothly. When I was in your place with my own ‘maniac’, my husband decided to go in to work later in the morning to help me out and stayed later in the day to get his job done. I needed help in the morning more than in the evening and that small adjustment in his work schedule made a big difference.