Answers please

Wynona I agree but what posts are you talking about?

Part of me wonders if it is because it always turns into a who is right / who is wrong debate and that isn’t what this forum is supposed to be used for?

For example I believe a thread was deleted about whether ADHD is real or not. It occurred to me that maybe it is gone because this is a Parenting A Child With ADHD forum not a Does ADHD Really Exsist forum? But then the one bashing teachers for no apparent reason is still up and that one really doesn’t belong under Parenting A Child With ADHD. I don’t think you are referring to that one as an education reform post because it offers no insight into what should be done. Most bright people know of course that blaming the teachers is just a scapgoat. I am a little sensitive on that because I am a teacher :D Also some of the posts really do attack posters and I guess when I think of coming to a parenting board I think of coming to a place where parents help each other. I came here to get parents opinions of what works for them not to get bumbarded with all of these articles and sites that tell me about anti-med and ADHD fraud. I am a smart enough person to find those on my own. I really don’t need more of that information. To tell you the truth I am sure their are parents who need that info and I respect that and just don’t read posts that don’t pertain to me. My son is compulsive, impulsive and a bit hyper. I love to hear from other parents what works for them to help their child. Sorry I just had to vent :D It has been a long day and I am glad you listened! See isn’t a parenting board a nice place to be? By the way you are obviously here because you have a child withh ADHD. (I know that is a silly thing to say and don’t mean to insult your inteligence) Would you like to share your story and maybe we could bounce ideas off of one another? My main concern is how to help my son be less impulsive. I am so scared he will hurt himself or another child!

Gina,

Isn’t it better to have correct information than information that just make people feel good about what they are doing.

For instance, it is not scapgoat it’s scapegoat and it is not bumbarded it is bombarded. Maybe guest had a point about teachers.

I see the pro-med people saying things that just are plain wrong someone says they are wrong and the pro med side all scream “prove it”. The other side obliges and when they win the point those posts get deleted.

I mean if you believe that censoring accurate and reliable information is the right thing to do because people can’t handle the truth I think that sets a foolish and dictatorial precedent. If people here wish to remain ignorant then all they need to do is not read scientific and factual information that proves what they believe is wrong. If they are too immature to do that maybe they should not come here at all.

Guest,

LOL- thanks for correcting me!

Why have you brought up the old med issue again! I don’t know if you read my post to Wynona (you) but I come here for opinions on how to help my child, not to debate medication. I don’t use it, my son doesn’t use it and I don’t want to talk about it. Why does it always have to come back to meds?

Guest you are obviously here because you have a child with ADHD. I don’t mean to insult your inteligence but this is a Parenting A Child With ADHD forum. What information are you seeking for your child? Can I help?

Parents come here with one big question to medicate or not to medicate. I think that providing them with information pro and con is the only responsible thing to do. I can’t help it if the reasons and the science support the position for not medicating.

I don’t think that questioning the wisdom of giving children potentially dangerous medication is a bad thing. I don’t think bringing up the motivations and conduct of big pharma is a bad thing either. If it offends people, oh well.

I am personally offended by obscenity and I have never seen anything as obscene as the salaries of top drug executives. Sorry but I can’t believe these people have our children’s best intrests at heart.

I used to tell my student that there were no dumb questions.

<<Parents come here with one big question to medicate or not to medicate. >>

Wynona, that’s not why I came here, nor why I continue to come. I come here because I desperately need advice as to how to best help my daughter, and hope I can be of some help to other struggling parents, if I can. Why are you here?

I have my own opinions about whether or not to medicate, as does pretty much everyone else on this board. That opinion is my own, and I have a right to it, after much research and educating myself about BOTH SIDES. We are all entitled to our opinion, and shouldn’t fear ridicule when we express our opinions, as long as we do so IN A RESPECTFUL MANNER. I don’t need or want to read belittling and condescending posts towards fellow posters.

I agree with Cathryn completely. I’ve been coming here for 2 years and view medication as just one possible tool we have available to us.

I think there are many other interesting topics we could discuss, including the pharmaceutical industry and the role of the government in our children’s education. As interesting as it may be, it doesn’t really help me make parenting decisions.

The fact that executives at a large successful company make alot of money doesn’t mean by definition that the products they sell don’t work. I tend to have a lot of faith in my own ability to see through marketing information. I don’t go to pharmaceutical web sites for information on their products and expect to get real life antecdotal information. That’s one of the reasons why I come here - to hear from parents who have used medication and what their experiences have been.

Ditto for any other intervention. I expect the Lindamood bell web site to talk about their successes. I only sent my child there after hearing positive things about it from real parents on these boards. That’s why the free and open exchange of personal experiences and information is so critical.

I came here (and remain here) for INFORMATION. My child is not ADHD or ADD, he is dyslexic and gifted in imagination and creativity, and has suffered in school because of this. I’m here to make sure I’m always at ‘the top of my game’ as a Mum, to learn, to share, and to provide and receive support on parenting issues.

I am also a cub leader who wants to do the best job I can for my cubs, so information about the various problems children (other than my own) have and how best to handle them is extremely valuable to me. This includes ALL children, those who require meds and those who don’t — I disregard the meds issue because it is not relevant to me — my kid doesn’t require them and any opinion about meds is not necessary for a cub leader — I leave that to the parents! AS SHOULD EVERYONE…

I am certainly always interested in new information about the medication question, but I agree that this is not what this board is best used for. (I have proposed a debate board in the past, and I think it might be a really useful idea.) I find it much more productive to share parenting questions and techniques. For some people, this means talking about medication - side effects, alternatives, etc. I think this is a legitimate discussion, too. I only get involved when folks state or imply that medications are the best or only answer for anyone, or when blatantly false representations are made that I feel compelled to correct. Otherwise, I have no interest in judging or “correcting” people’s positions on this issue. As I have said before, a lot depends on your family’s values and philosophy. There is no “right” answer that everyone is going to agree on.

I have posted what might be considered “anti-med” data and never had it deleted. I think as long as people are respectful the posts are left in place. In fact, a lot of disrespectful posts are left in place, too. Sometimes the atmosphere is intolerable, and people leave the board for that reason. Anyone who is really interested in educating others should keep in mind that people don’t listen well when berated.

But in the end, as stated by an earlier poster, I think the medication question isn’t really as vital as it is made out to be. It is clear in the long run that other variables determine our children’s ultimate success - things like developing high-level parenting skills, strong advocacy in schools, building on strengths, and working with kids to develop their own techniques for coping with the challenges they will meet in the world. Whether or not parents choose to use medication doesn’t appear to be a big factor in long-term outcomes for these children. So I’d rather spend energy on sharing parenting ideas, learning about how schools work, identifying alternative approaches to education that work better for our kids, and finding ways to motivate our children to succeed. We can debate all day on medication and we will still have a wide diversity of opinions, because we are a diverse group of people. While we should stick to facts and not rhetoric, the object should be to provide support rather than attacking each other.

Good parenting and good educational interventions work for everyone, wherever they come down on the medication issue. I think that is when this board gets really valuable - when we discuss things that parents can really use on a day-to-day basis.

A debate area wouldn’t work here for obvious reasons.

Start a debate thread an see what happens.

I predict when the anti-drug folks start making a point the pro druggers will cry foul.

I’m really trying to be respectful, Steve. But this poster, who doesn’t identify him/herself sounds like nothing more than a sullen teenager to me! See his/her quote below:

<<Start a debate thread an see what happens.

I predict when the anti-drug folks start making a point the pro druggers will cry foul.>>

He/she posts on this board quite frequently, and is always trying to pick a fight. He/she doesn’t seem to care what the topic is. If there isn’t something nasty being said about something or someone, this person will start a new thread in an attempt to get it all started again! You can tell by the style of writing and the verbiage used it’s the same person, under various different pseudonyms.

I agree, Steve, a LOT of disrespectful posts haven’t been deleted from this forum. It’s only when a thread is really carried too far that it gets deleted… regardless of whether it’s pro-med, anti-med, or regarding something else entirely.

I for one wish the Guest or Guests would identify themselves. I would put alot more faith in their opinions if I knew who they were.

I am struck by the fact that this forum is called parenting a child with adhd, but not alot is posted about behavioral techniques used effectively at home(lots is posted on the parenting a child with ld boards about remediation, not just accomodation) but I don’t read much here about what works to teach anger control, organization, social skills, eye contact, and responsibility. The endless dialogue about meds is not the whole story, and ends up as an arguement that helps no one.

[quote=”SAR”]I am struck by the fact that this forum is called parenting a child with adhd, but not alot is posted about behavioral techniques used effectively at home(lots is posted on the parenting a child with ld boards about remediation, not just accomodation) but I don’t read much here about what works to teach anger control, organization, social skills, eye contact, and responsibility. The endless dialogue about meds is not the whole story, and ends up as an arguement that helps no one.[/quote

Anyone posting here can partipate in other threads or start their own threads. What happens though is they go to the threads that go against their mistaken beliefs. The get nasty and when the facts prove them wrong they get nastier.

The fact that they won’t start their own threads to discuss their concerns is not the fault of the parents here who question the wisdom of drugging children.

Presenting both side is a good thing inspite of the fact that the other side can’t always keep it’s cool. When a fact is a fact you can jump up and down and stomp your feet and cry foul all day long but that is not going to change reality.

I think the reason that the disgruntled pro druggers is because they are unsure if what they are doing is right. In order to convince themselves they must protest fiercely as to how correct their beliefs are. Jimmy Swaggart is a good example of that. If they read something that shakes them out of their false sense of security they go on the attack.

The studies and the expert opinions that get post here are merely fact and educated opinions. If people can’t handle that they should skip reading those threads. To those people I would say that on message boards like this one all over the net similar facts and opinions get posted all the time. I bet it drives some of you nuts. So those of you from CHADD I would say you people are WRONG. I would further say open your mind.

“Anyone posting here can partipate in other threads or start their own threads. What happens though is they go to the threads that go against their mistaken beliefs. The get nasty and when the facts prove them wrong they get nastier.

The fact that they won’t start their own threads to discuss their concerns is not the fault of the parents here who question the wisdom of drugging children.

Presenting both side is a good thing inspite of the fact that the other side can’t always keep it’s cool. When a fact is a fact you can jump up and down and stomp your feet and cry foul all day long but that is not going to change reality.

I think the reason that the disgruntled pro druggers is because they are unsure if what they are doing is right. In order to convince themselves they must protest fiercely as to how correct their beliefs are. Jimmy Swaggart is a good example of that. If they read something that shakes them out of their false sense of security they go on the attack.

The studies and the expert opinions that get post here are merely fact and educated opinions. If people can’t handle that they should skip reading those threads. To those people I would say that on message boards like this one all over the net similar facts and opinions get posted all the time. I bet it drives some of you nuts. So those of you from CHADD I would say you people are WRONG. I would further say open your mind.[/quote]

Pot, kettle, black.

[quote=”Anonymous”]”Anyone posting here can partipate in other threads or start their own threads. What happens though is they go to the threads that go against their mistaken beliefs. The get nasty and when the facts prove them wrong they get nastier.

The fact that they won’t start their own threads to discuss their concerns is not the fault of the parents here who question the wisdom of drugging children.

Presenting both side is a good thing inspite of the fact that the other side can’t always keep it’s cool. When a fact is a fact you can jump up and down and stomp your feet and cry foul all day long but that is not going to change reality.

I think the reason that the disgruntled pro druggers is because they are unsure if what they are doing is right. In order to convince themselves they must protest fiercely as to how correct their beliefs are. Jimmy Swaggart is a good example of that. If they read something that shakes them out of their false sense of security they go on the attack.

The studies and the expert opinions that get post here are merely fact and educated opinions. If people can’t handle that they should skip reading those threads. To those people I would say that on message boards like this one all over the net similar facts and opinions get posted all the time. I bet it drives some of you nuts. So those of you from CHADD I would say you people are WRONG. I would further say open your mind.[/quote]

Pot, kettle, black.[/quote]

Hey Pot, Kettle, Black, One of the ways to have an open mind is to become educated and gather information about a subject. I have done that and by analyzing all the information I have so far I can safely say that the ADHD thing is pretty much a scam by the drug companies to make money.

I don’t even know how to play devil’s advocate and pretend to takr the drug kids side. I think if I did the words would get stuck in my throat.

You are so in denial! The characteristics of ADHD are REAL. Quit getting hung up on the name. Okay I’ll say ADHD isn’t real… My kid is still needing help with hyperness and impulsivity and focusing. I am STILL using behavior modification to help him work through his rough spots. No ADHD but still behavioral issues. Boy is that hard to get? Did you know that the FLU isn’t really the flu? Vomiting does not come from the flu. That’s a fact. Let’s protest all we have ever known or just accept that when we vomit we are sick. No we can’t we have to give it a name and argue that it isn’t real….

Amen! That is the it! Guest, you really should identify yourself and take credit for that statement. ADHD will, in my opinion, eventually be found to be a number of conditions that are slightly different and require different treatment options! The symptoms are what we are dealing with on a daily basis! Terry

[quote=”Anonymous”]You are so in denial! The characteristics of ADHD are REAL. Quit getting hung up on the name. Okay I’ll say ADHD isn’t real… My kid is still needing help with hyperness and impulsivity and focusing. I am STILL using behavior modification to help him work through his rough spots. No ADHD but still behavioral issues. Boy is that hard to get? Did you know that the FLU isn’t really the flu? Vomiting does not come from the flu. That’s a fact. Let’s protest all we have ever known or just accept that when we vomit we are sick. No we can’t we have to give it a name and argue that it isn’t real….[/quote]

Taking a bunch of subjective “symptoms” and calling it a disease is pure lunacy.

The flu virus is a real thing. It can be found and identified. Flu symptoms are caused by the virus.

What causes ADHD? answer…Unknown

What is the test for ADHD? answer From a rational and scientific view point there is none.

Why do Asian and Europeon students have a 500% less chance of being medicated?

Why do Europeon and Asian students and Canadian students out perform American students? Please don’t give a racist answer.

Why do Europeon, Asian and Canadian teachers out perform US teachers?

Here’s another question that you won’t answer. What mark would you give American teachers A, B, C, D, or F ?

What mark would you give American students?