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Submitted by an LD OnLine user on

My daughter does not seem to know not to joke about bodily functions in front of adults. Maybe I shouldn’t laugh or tolerate the toilet humor. She almost sent the Music Teacher a Valentine that used her made up word “Vomitine”. I’m curious how other parents deal with toilet humor.
Terry

Submitted by Roxie on Tue, 02/24/2004 - 12:21 PM

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Chances are, this is common humor among her friends at school. My son is now 9.5 and he and his friends are still doing this, my girls got out of it sooner. There is simply about body humor, and parent reaction I suspect, that they really enjoy. However, that doesn’t change that you would like to see this stopped, or at least toned down. I can tell you what I have done, whether it’ll help you or not, time will tell. I tried to show as little reaction as possible, and when they really did say something funny, I got out of the room before they could see me laughing. I told them that they were not to use that humor at friends houses, or school, etc. since not everyone finds that kind of stuff funny, and some people might get mad. I explained that they could get in trouble, and that some parents don’t like their kids to play with other kids that used that type of humor.
It helped, but it didn’t eliminate it all together. I worried less when I noticed how many of their peers were doing the same thing.

Submitted by JenM on Tue, 02/24/2004 - 12:26 PM

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When my daughter was younger (maybe more like 3 or 4?) she kept saying potty words. I finally told her there was a place and time for that and now was not that time. So, I told her if she wanted to talk like that it was fine with me but please go in the bathroom and shut the door. Potty talk belongs in the potty! So, she did. She went in there and said all her potty words. I could hear her through the door. Came out and had it out of her system. I set a firm rule where no potty talk is allowed at the table. When she starts now (just turned 7) and it’s too much (getting on nerves) I give her the option of stopping or going into the bathroom. She usually chooses to stop!

Submitted by Anonymous on Tue, 02/24/2004 - 5:19 PM

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She’s awfully young, so she might not yet be aware of the “social rules” about what is or isn’t appropriate in particular settings. Kids with LD or ADHD often tend to be particularly clueless about this stuff and they also tend to act and think, at least is the social skills realm, like kids a few years younger than their chronological age. I wonder if your daughter would respond well to some kind rule that you could explain, along the lines of the notion of confining bathroom talk to the bathroom, or saying only at home, or something like that?

Submitted by Anonymous on Tue, 02/24/2004 - 7:30 PM

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[quote=”Anonymous”]She’s awfully young, so she might not yet be aware of the “social rules” about what is or isn’t appropriate in particular settings. Kids with LD or ADHD often tend to be particularly clueless about this stuff and they also tend to act and think, at least is the social skills realm, like kids a few years younger than their chronological age. I wonder if your daughter would respond well to some kind rule that you could explain, along the lines of the notion of confining bathroom talk to the bathroom, or saying only at home, or something like that?[/quote]

You are so wrong. Children making toilet talk how unusual! How appalling! Imagine that a 5 year old kid making toilet humor. You must be sooooooooo embarassed. How awful for you.

This sounds like a job for (fanfare please) Captain Concerta. It’s never too soon to start those much needed psycho-stims. I say drug em before you slug em and when they’re as docile as a lamb you may even wanna hug em.

GOD Bless psycho stims

Submitted by Anonymous on Tue, 02/24/2004 - 7:40 PM

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One more thing, even though Captain Concerta does not have the power to give a 5 year old the judgement to know what kind of humao is appropriate around phoney adults,the good captain will keep her as meek as a kitten and isn’t that how we want little girls to act?

Submitted by Anonymous on Tue, 02/24/2004 - 8:14 PM

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Ignore guest’s comments…. My friend’s use bathroom talk in the bathroom. She said it works for them. My son says some pretty embarassing things at the most awful times. At a birthday party he turned to a kid and said your a f-ing a-hole. I honestly can say he didn’t get it from me :D He’s also said that he is eating a penis while eating a hotdog. Not very happy about that one either. As much as I know it is somewhat age appropriate, it is difficult to hear your child talk like this. I remind him over and over to not talk this way in front of adults. We talk about that he shouldn’t do it at all but I know kids need to be kids. By the way, I really came down on him for the swearing! Good luck

Submitted by Anonymous on Tue, 02/24/2004 - 9:28 PM

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Hmm, Captain Concerta. Do you think a parent should do nothing when a child use bad words to a teacher, to grandma, at church, at the library, etc., since it is “normal” behavior for a young child to engage in toliet talk? This mom was concerned because her 7 year old daughter didn’t seem to understand that it would be inappropriate to use that kind of talk when writing a valentine to her teacher. If you think that kind of communication is perfectly fine and that a parent should not discourage it, well, all I can say is that it explains a lot about the kinds of messages you post.

Submitted by Anonymous on Tue, 02/24/2004 - 9:52 PM

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I just had a dinner with an adult who was also very into ‘toilet humor’. His jokes set half the table into fits of laughter and the other half into shock.

It’s a matter of taste. Some people find it amusing and others are put off by it. Your post isn’t quite clear on which side of that fence you’re on but it suggests you find it amusing but recognize that her Music Teacher might not.

I’d say - explain that to her. Tell her what’s funny and what’s not changes with each person and that some kind of jokes risk upsetting people especially the prim and proper people we teachers can be. Help her choose another funny card that doesn’t use toilet humor to show her the other kinds of humor that can be used without risk of offending anybody.

Good luck.l

Submitted by Anonymous on Tue, 02/24/2004 - 11:24 PM

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[quote=”Anonymous”]Hmm, Captain Concerta. Do you think a parent should do nothing when a child use bad words to a teacher, to grandma, at church, at the library, etc., since it is “normal” behavior for a young child to engage in toliet talk? This mom was concerned because her 7 year old daughter didn’t seem to understand that it would be inappropriate to use that kind of talk when writing a valentine to her teacher. If you think that kind of communication is perfectly fine and that a parent should not discourage it, well, all I can say is that it explains a lot about the kinds of messages you post.[/quote]

Speaking firmly to the child may be considered child abuse and washing the tykes mouth out with soap would be even more barbaric. The only right thing to do if a child talks about cacca, or pee pee or poop is to take that child to a doctor and have him evaluated for NTTD (naughty toilet talk disorder) but just to be on the safe side they need to be put on Ritalin. That way they won’t talk much at all and they will become very compliant.

There is nothing worse than a willful child!

Submitted by Anonymous on Tue, 02/24/2004 - 11:36 PM

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Floyd thanks for your input! Great ideas you have!

Submitted by Anonymous on Tue, 02/24/2004 - 11:47 PM

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[quote=”Gina”]Floyd thanks for your input! Great ideas you have![/quote]

Thanks Gina, I do what I can. :)

Submitted by Anonymous on Tue, 02/24/2004 - 11:53 PM

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I know you do. I am glad we have remebered the thread is titled humor. By the way, I have a student on Ritalin and he STILL has the mouth of a truck driver. :wink:

Submitted by TerryB on Wed, 02/25/2004 - 2:07 AM

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Thanks Roxie, JenM, Sara and Gina. I think that I am part of the problem. I just can’t help laughing when someone blasts out gas that sounds like a woodpecker. I laughed hysterically when my daughter was 3 and she one day asked why we had to stop and get “GAS” when she already had “GAS” and would really like to get rid of some rather than get more. One day, when she was two, Dad was taking care of her and when I came home she greeted me at the door with the proclamation that she had a yeast CONfectiion rather than an INfection (she had neither.) We still laugh about that one. I think that you can teach most kids to only joke like this with close family or close friends but I’m not sure that an ADHD child can control their impulsiveness well enough to stop themselves from blurting out something inappropriate in public.

It sounds like most of you Moms are a little more refined at home then I have been. Terry

Submitted by JenM on Wed, 02/25/2004 - 12:34 PM

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Terry, don’t feel alone in this! It may not be potty talk but sometimes my daughter says something so funny that it takes all of our self control not to laugh. Sometimes either my husband or I have to leave the dinner table because if we even look at eachother it’s all over! This kid is a trip! Whether it’s because of her adhd impulsiveness (which she has a lot of) or how bright she is (because some of it is very witty) I don’t know! Maybe a combination! Whatever it is it’s part of what we love about her! It’s funny because my husband and I will be doing our best to not laugh uncontrollably before we can address what was said and our older daughter will be sitting there speechless with her mouth hanging open. And when she laughs she has the real deep belly laugh that just compels you to laugh along with her!

Submitted by KarenN on Wed, 02/25/2004 - 2:11 PM

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My son and his friends (9 and 10) think this is great stuff, and are also now incorporating sexual humor into their repetoire. (age appropriate stuff) Frankly, I’m thrilled he’s socially savvy enough to play along with the other boys

However, I have made it clear to him that that there will be topics he finds hysterical with his friends that are NOT appropriate in my company, in front of teachers or other adults. That’s my rule and it seems to be working.

Submitted by KarenN on Wed, 02/25/2004 - 2:12 PM

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WHy oh why when we try to have a conversation about useful, productive ways of dealing with our children’s behavior that DON’T include medication, a “guest” still feels its necessary to chime in on the meds question? You’d think the people who feel so deeply that medication is wrong would want to encourage discussion about non-medical intervention. I just don’t get it.

Submitted by Anonymous on Wed, 02/25/2004 - 5:38 PM

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<<This sounds like a job for (fanfare please) Captain Concerta. It’s never too soon to start those much needed psycho-stims. I say drug em before you slug em and when they’re as docile as a lamb you may even wanna hug em.>>

That is so sick. I pity you. Nobody on this thread made any mention about “drugs” or child abuse, just YOU. You are the one with the problem here, or should I say “obsession”? These people are on this board for support, not your hatred, whoever you are.

By the way, who ARE you? You obviously don’t have the courage to even choose a nickname, only post venomous and insulting posts, hiding under the guise of “Guest”.

Please choose a nickname, because, in your case, “Guest” is inappropriate. You aren’t wanted or needed here. Get a life.

“Captain Concerta”? Is that supposed to be ironic, sarcastic or funny? Well, it isn’t any of those. It does, however, display your ignorance and lack of education for all of us to see in writing.

And lest you attack me, I don’t give my child any meds, I have never laid a hand on her, do not neglect her in any way, have NO PROBLEM reading both sides of the meds issue (as long as it’s written by a mature adult, and is respectful and factual), and I’m not a teacher. What will you insult me for? No doubt you will come up with something. Or maybe you’re not THAT clever.

Submitted by Anonymous on Wed, 02/25/2004 - 5:57 PM

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[quote=”someone who cares”]<<This sounds like a job for (fanfare please) Captain Concerta. It’s never too soon to start those much needed psycho-stims. I say drug em before you slug em and when they’re as docile as a lamb you may even wanna hug em.>>

That is so sick. I pity you. Nobody on this thread made any mention about “drugs” or child abuse, just YOU. You are the one with the problem here, or should I say “obsession”? These people are on this board for support, not your hatred, whoever you are.

By the way, who ARE you? You obviously don’t have the courage to even choose a nickname, only post venomous and insulting posts, hiding under the guise of “Guest”.

Please choose a nickname, because, in your case, “Guest” is inappropriate. You aren’t wanted or needed here. Get a life.

“Captain Concerta”? Is that supposed to be ironic, sarcastic or funny? Well, it isn’t any of those. It does, however, display your ignorance and lack of education for all of us to see in writing.

And lest you attack me, I don’t give my child any meds, I have never laid a hand on her, do not neglect her in any way, have NO PROBLEM reading both sides of the meds issue (as long as it’s written by a mature adult, and is respectful and factual), and I’m not a teacher. What will you insult me for? No doubt you will come up with something. Or maybe you’re not THAT clever.[/quote]

This thread started with a mom complaining that her child is exhibiting childlike behavior. The tone of the thread was “my kid is acting like a kid so there must be something wrong with her”

I think the Captain Concerta post’s sarcasm helped to put things into perspective.

Submitted by Anonymous on Wed, 02/25/2004 - 6:10 PM

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[quote=”Anonymous”]

This thread started with a mom complaining that her child is exhibiting childlike behavior. The tone of the thread was “my kid is acting like a kid so there must be something wrong with her”

I think the Captain Concerta post’s sarcasm helped to put things into perspective.[/quote]

But, in all honesty, most kids of 7 WOULD understand that you don’t talk that way to a teacher, even if they otherwise think such talk is hysterical. Clearly, most children do find it funny and they engage in it with friends and siblings. They are savvy enough, however, to know that you don’t do potty talk with your minister, your teacher or your parent’s grown-up friends. They might impulsively do so anyway, but Terry B’s daughter wasn’t really being impulsive. She was writing a valentine to her teacher and did not understand that joking around with that teacher in a way that a child would find funny was not an appropriate way to deal with an adult authority figure. When a kid with LD or ADHD doesn’t “get” the social rules that other kids his or her age do understand, that can be an indicator of a problem and Terry B was not off base in asking the question.

Submitted by KarenN on Wed, 02/25/2004 - 7:55 PM

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A mom might come here to complain about her child, but if she’s here, chances are this is a child with a learning or attentional problem. So even the ordinary is different. There’s nothing wrong with bringing every day problems and questions here. Let’s not belittle people who seek information and suggestions.

Submitted by TerryB on Wed, 02/25/2004 - 10:31 PM

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Don’t worry friends. I don’t read the Troll’s posts anyway. I don’t seek approval from Trolls. Terry

Submitted by Roxie on Wed, 02/25/2004 - 10:36 PM

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Good for you Terry, especially since you never said that there was something wrong with your daughter, you just asked how others handle it. It’s so sad that threads on this board get hijacked so often by this poster who has nothing relevant to add to this board or any topic on this board.

Submitted by Anonymous on Thu, 02/26/2004 - 3:31 AM

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[quote=”TerryB”]My daughter does not seem to know not to joke about bodily functions in front of adults. Maybe I shouldn’t laugh or tolerate the toilet humor. She almost sent the Music Teacher a Valentine that used her made up word “Vomitine”. I’m curious how other parents deal with toilet humor.
Terry[/quote]

As the resident comic here and as someone who lacks the social graces to understand proper white society I think the little girl showed creativity and humor. Let’s squash all independent thought and creativity among our children. Our society Needs another poet, artist, philosopher and deep thinkers like we need a hole in the head.

What we need are more amoral and souless digit heads to design new weapons systems that can kill remotely from the oval office. In the meantime we need to produce compliant drones to do GW’s bidding.

Perhaps the creation of the word “Vomitine” expresses her sentiments about her school.

Submitted by judih on Thu, 02/26/2004 - 4:18 AM

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i think you’re probably right, bilial.

and you’re also right about stopping all creativity. Nip it in the bud.
Wherever it pops up.

i teach ADHDs and the moment a kid turns a somersault in mid-air, i catch him/her and buckle them up to prevent further acrobatics.

Crazy glue is a teacher’s best friend - for mouths, jeans and brains. Seal em up

Toilet humour is best ignored. Wild teacher reaction simply reinforces the joy in engaging in such conversations.

Or, in other words, a non-shocked teacher offers a good excuse for kids to find something else to do.

As long as learners have light in their eyes - let’s not extinguish it.

good morning to all

judih

Submitted by TerryB on Fri, 02/27/2004 - 12:23 PM

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Hi Everybody,
Thanks for the responses. We’re going to clean up our act at home with the humor so that my daughter can “practice” humor control a bit. Sometimes it’s hard to see that you are contributing to the problem. My child can’t handle the contradiction of having parents that tolerate the toilet humor and teachers that are offended by it. Some kids probably can handle it better than mine.
Terry

Submitted by Anonymous on Fri, 02/27/2004 - 2:26 PM

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That is exactly it for us too! I never put my finger on it but that is it. We find that humor somewhat funny and really aren’t modeling good humor for him to bring into the world. He can’t handle the contradiction either!

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