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Hey tutors out there, ever run into this??

Submitted by an LD OnLine user on

I ran into a problem, actually twice yesterday. One of them has a possible explanation as she said she was going into surgery shortly. BUt the other just did not show. She has not called back. There was no indication there were any concerns, just didn’t show. I tried calling and she has been unavailable. Do parents ever do this? Just not show up again? Seems odd when they state how concerned they are and so on, even say they are happy with you. I realize there can be extenuating circumstances but I have a bad feeling about that one. I also don’t get it.

Thanks,

—des

Submitted by Anonymous on Wed, 04/14/2004 - 6:21 PM

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Have they paid yet? We paid our tutor for the month ahead on the last session of the month(like music lessons), so if we didn’t show for the session it was our loss.

Submitted by des on Wed, 04/14/2004 - 9:40 PM

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Maybe they should pay up front!! That would reduce the likelihood of this happening again. I know I wouldn’t have one of my clients that way but maybe that’s the way it should be.

—des

Submitted by victoria on Thu, 04/15/2004 - 4:33 AM

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Yes, this happens frequently. If you go back to the advice I gave when you first set up, I mentioned that about half the callers don’t actually start tutoring, and that a certain proportion, a third to a half, start tutoring but give up quite fast.

Yes, they are concerned. Yes, they want help. But the kind of help they want is for someone to wave a magic wand and make them right and the rest of the world wrong. (We get some of these on this site regularly too, don’t we?) When they discover that they still have to work hard, that the child doesn’t suddently become happy and perfect, that you are not going to tell them and the child that they are perfect, they look around for another miracle cure and another and another.

There’s no point in beating yourself up over it; after a week without a call, sell the time slot to someone else. It’s their loss financially and educationally as they continue chasing miracles and buying snake oil, and just don’t extend credit or leave materials with students so you don’t take a loss.

By the way, this is one reason I don’t give a free first hour or whatever and why I get payment by the session. If people quit, they quit, no fuss.

Submitted by des on Thu, 04/15/2004 - 5:10 AM

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Well one of the parents called and there was a genuine emergency. However the one has not called back yet. So I’m not holding my breath.

>Yes, this happens frequently. If you go back to the advice I gave when you first set up, I mentioned that about half the callers don’t actually start tutoring, and that a certain proportion, a third to a half, start tutoring but give up quite fast.

Yes as a matter of fact, I remember this.

>Yes, they are concerned. Yes, they want help. But the kind of help they want is for someone to wave a magic wand and make them right and the

As a matter of fact, this could very well fit this particular parent.

>There’s no point in beating yourself up over it; after a week without a call, sell the time slot to someone else. It’s their loss financially and

Yep too bad I’m not yet doing well enough to do that easily, but if someone does come around that’s all I’ll hold it for.

>By the way, this is one reason I don’t give a free first hour or whatever and why I get payment by the session. If people quit, they quit, no fuss.

Yes, they don’t owe me anything.

At pretty much the same time, this school that was going to have me tutor backed out of it. I thought it was a pretty sure thing, though no contracts or anythign like that went on. Anyway, I was supposed to talk with this teacher. I thought it was just to figure out a schedule and it ended up really being an interview (or so it seemed). I didn’t do so well, can’t think on my feet quite that well, and I was very surprised— just wasn’t expecting this. I think it quite possible that she was going to have me work there anyway.

So this was not such a good day yesterday. I was most relieved when one of the parents did call me.

—des

Submitted by victoria on Thu, 04/15/2004 - 10:22 PM

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Yes, give them a week or so to call — they have complicated lives with all the usual stresses plus a child with difficulties, and it’s normal to have some perturbations now and then. Another reason I’m happier with pay-as-you-go.

The surprise interview — yes, I’ve had than one sprung on me a couple of times; one time after I had sent all my worldly belongings 1500 miles by mover. It’s not fun, it’s very unfair, and it’s one of the fifty-six reasons I don’t trust school administrators as far as I can throw them and why I am presently not working at a school.
They need extra help, and it’s their loss that they won’t take it when a qualified person offers it. Stick to your guns and don’t let them make it somehow your fault and back you into accepting this change and that change and the other in the tutoring plans until you are cornered into an unacceptable situation.

Meanwhile, as the weather gets nicer, I have decided to make up a flyer or brochure — a single page folded in half to make four little pages with French on one side and English on the other, can get this done at the copy center for under ten cents a copy, make three or four hundred of them, and I and my tenant are going to take them up to the rich folks on top of the hill and down by the riverside and go stuff mailboxes one of these fine afternoons. You might try something similar to drum up more business from people who actually appreciate your work.

Submitted by Anonymous on Fri, 04/16/2004 - 12:35 AM

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and also from a Neuropsyche in a neighboring city. Plus somewhere on the internet my name is on a website that someone put together that says I’m trained in LMB. I got a call today from a parochial HS who had seen this particular website…Wild huh?

Yeah, I have been stood up numerous times. It is frustrating, I figure that the parents may have similar issues that their kids have…organization and the like… :lol: But it still irks me…nevertheless

Submitted by Anonymous on Fri, 04/16/2004 - 2:40 AM

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It has happened to me too. Very disconcerting. That is why I have parents pay in advance now. This is the same reason why music teachers have families pay for lessons in advance.

victoria, I don’t know about Canada, but in the U.S. it’s illegal to stuff flyers into mailboxes. You have to leave the flyers outside the box, as inside is reserved for cancelled-postage mail only.

On a side note, I would consider asking the local music school if you can leave a small stand with flyers in it. Families who can afford music lessons can afford tutoring sessions. Also, parents are often waiting and have time to read the flyer right there.

Nancy

Submitted by Anonymous on Fri, 04/16/2004 - 4:23 AM

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I can SO relate. I have started a peer tutoring project. We are tutoring kids for free. I have trained my own children and the neighbor children as a way to give back to the community. We have been trying to come up with a family project,…visit an old folk’s home, food for the poor type thing. My kids are too self centered and needed a project. “I’ts not about You” as the Purpose Driven Life quotes.

WELL….guess what…..today I was supposed to do an initial test on two seperate families etc.. The lady never showed up nor did the next group. I could have gone to the gym. I brought all my stuff home from school and arranged the day, got the house clean.

We are asking people to bring cans of food for the needy as payment. I can see right now I’m stupid. I tried to pick a project that I am passionate about. First week went great. The following week, one mom said her boy couldn’t come, others didn’t show without a call. Now some people are appreciative but….

Ya try to something nice. I spent 200 dollars on supplies.

When people get stuff for free, they just don’t appreciate it. Everyday Each year I turn more Republican and am leaving my democratic party . I argued for years with people how we need to help those needy people….and how they need help. give them chances, give them opportunites…well, I’m starting not to feel as bad for them.

I need to get over it I know, but, had to vent.

MichelleAZ

Submitted by victoria on Fri, 04/16/2004 - 5:54 AM

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Nancy — people up here don’t get uptight about the mailbox as long as you don’t make a mess. I get flyers from local businesses all the time. Don’t know what the actual law says and prefer to remain in ignorance, we get along pretty well in our own quiet way in this area.

Michelle — I also warned Des not to give tutoring away for free, as you just cheapen your value in the eyes of the public. Sad but true.
Some years back when I was married and he claimed to be supporting me I had time to volunteer in the community. I tried working with the social services center in the town; I and my daughter were assigned a brother and sister who needed help reading. They showed up for two or three sessions, made excuses the next two, and then disappeared for good.
Then I volunteered with a group of mostly senior citizens who helped with reading in the schools. Unfortunately they had bought into a philosophy of just have the kid draw a picture and write a story about it, which doesn’t do much for reading skills, but they said it was OK if I did more. I asked especially for Grade 1 which most of the rest of the volunteers were too afraid to take on. I was assigned one boy in our local school and later asked if I could take a boy needing real help in another school nearby. Well, the teacher of the first boy never found it convenient to let him come to get help; she found every way to have him not come to the tutoring sessions. She was also notable for never having anything on the blackboard except the list of kids being punished (which almost always included my student.) He was actually gifted but never given a chance to show it. The other teacher was as different as possible; she always had an organized class and lots and lots of reading all over. The boy was always ready and in a good mood about working. After a month or so she asked me if I could take on a second and then a third student — she wasn’t territorial over getting her students some help when they needed it. I may mention by the way that the excellent teacher was a member of a minority group and she wasn’t hung up over that either, although the horrid teacher was very racist as well.

My point here is that when you volunteer there are lots of disappointments but if you keep trying you may find someone who will value the skills and knowledge that you have to offer.

Submitted by des on Fri, 04/16/2004 - 8:28 PM

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Yes, someone called from the Indian liason service or something. I told them that I had to earn a living. It’s just a fact, I can’t afford to give away my services if I wanted to. I would suggest if you want to volunteer (or want the kids to) to do if thru an organization. That way you aren’t putting lots of your own money into things.

I wouldn’t worry about the mailbox thing, well I doubt anyone would care, though I think it is technically illegal. I know people do cars and front doors. The thing is that I don’t know that people really read these things! I know I rarely do.

—des

Submitted by Sue on Fri, 04/16/2004 - 10:02 PM

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The ‘mailbox thing’ varies from place to place — where I’m from it would be a big deal, esp. if you were a business. However, in the D.C. suburbs, if they didn’t enforce it, people would use post office boxes for all sorts of things.
Free tutoring is generally a mistake. People do not value what doesn’t cost them anything; seems counter-intuitive and there are exceptions, but it’s been proven again and again and again. When I was getting started in teachign swimming I at least charged a little bit — just something so that people felt like they should at least show up. If people haven’t paid anything for something, they don’t go. (Think of fitness centers — even when people *have* paid for something, they don’t go. IT requires a change in habits and that takes some serious momentum manipulation.)

Submitted by victoria on Fri, 04/16/2004 - 11:13 PM

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On fliers — I won’t put them on car windshields, because when people do this to me it is a serious annoyance, not giving a good impression of the business at all.

When things come in the mailbox I take a quick glance to see what they are. I keep the informational ones, the restaurant menus for the tenants to order, the fliers from home repair people if I ever get the money for the roof, etc. So the idea is to make it very short and snappy and to the point. Headline: Help With Your Schoolwork (in two languages on opposite ends of the paper). Probably nine people out of ten will toss it, bit that’s the point of mass advertising.

I figure that if I can get 400 fliers for $30.00, if I even get one hour tutoring out of it I’ve broken even on cash, and I won’t worry too much about the time, Cedrik (tenant) and I will have a nice walk in spring weather in the new development. If the first batch of fliers gets any feelers, we’ll try another couple of neighbourhoods.

Submitted by Janis on Sat, 04/17/2004 - 2:46 AM

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Michelle, I am sorry to hear about the people not showing. It is easy to get cynical in that situation. I understand you desire to teach your children to help others. We try to do various things like Angel Tree or Samaritan’s Purse boxes at Christmas and we sponsor a child in China. Youth in our church volunteer at the soup kitchen every couple of months. I think there are many things like that which you can do that are good lessons and serve a good purpose.

But like some of the others, I think you should charge for tutoring. I feel like I am giving a partial gift as it is by charging half as much as Lindamood-Bell does.

Janis

Submitted by Janis on Sat, 04/17/2004 - 2:50 AM

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Now I will share my marketing idea with all of you!

I am planning to have a speaker come from the nearest Learning Disabilites Association to do a free presentation for parents. My business partner and I will advertise it and be the sponsors. That will get our name out there and then we will have our brochures at the meeting.

Janis

Submitted by victoria on Sat, 04/17/2004 - 4:23 AM

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Janis — I do like your idea of a meeting for parents. My fear in doing this is getting a speaker who will contradict every single thing I do — how do you make sure of what will be presented?

Submitted by Janis on Sat, 04/17/2004 - 2:59 PM

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That’s a great question, Victoria! I was thinking of a very harmless topic like how to help your child with homework or attention issues. I don’t want a speaker to get into remediation issues unless I know exactly where they are coming from. I want the meeting to be very focused on things relating to a parents role in helping the child.

Janis

Submitted by Anonymous on Sat, 04/17/2004 - 6:21 PM

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I got stood up today… :? well they called and said that they were driving in from out of town and couldn’t make our appointment, but maybe later on today :x …. I said, “Well you can try calling me later and if I am home I am home and if I am gone oh well.. :shock: :lol: :roll:

Submitted by Anonymous on Sat, 04/17/2004 - 6:47 PM

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I was just skimming over this thread… maybe you have thought of this before. Our school district keeps a list of tutors, by subject, age level, etc. Each school counselors has access to it for when parents ask about tutoring. Also, the supervisor of all the counselors will pass along flyers, information, etc. - that way individuals are not bothered at their schools by phone calls, etc. from people looking to promote their services. Another possiblity is joining an organization such at Tutorfind.

Submitted by des on Sun, 04/18/2004 - 4:08 AM

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I have contacted a few schools like this. It might be a good idea, but many of the schools don’t seem too receptive. They say things like “we have an after school tutoring program”. I have given my cards and flyers out to schools but so far got one call out of all that.

As for getting stood up, it happens to me fairly often. I do charge for missed appointments and that works for some parents.

—des

Submitted by victoria on Sun, 04/18/2004 - 4:53 AM

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I have had dead zero luck with organizations like Tutorfind. In some cases I get no calls at all, and from one organization I got a couple of inappropriate calls. You might be luckier in your area, always worth a try, but don’t hold your breath.

When I try to register my name with schools, or in one case the local library, I usually get the looking-down-the-nose “We only hire our OWN teachers, after all we wouldn’t want to have just ANY unqualified person, would we?”

Janis — I asked that question because I have been burned more than once. Suppose you choose what you think is a relatively non-controversial topic like how to help with homework. The “expert” speaker, whom you have brought in, stands up and tells parents that the best thing they can do is just read at their children, that beginners should just recite after the parent or make up their own story and that is their “reading” homework, that it is a very very bad idea to push children to read, they will pick it up when they are ready, that under no conditions should they tell the child about any phonics because it will interfere with the wonderful reading skills being taught in the schools, that if the child doesn’t know a word they should never ask to sound it out, that’s a terrible idea, just tell him what it says, don’t ever correct reading errors … I would be most cautious about a speaker’s philosophy before promoting them.

Submitted by Janis on Sun, 04/18/2004 - 6:03 PM

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Victoria,

Your point is well taken. Maybe my speaker should come from the IDA instead of LDA! (Just kidding, mostly). But I suppose the safest thing would be to attend the session at another location and then invite the speaker here. That way you’d know all the subject matter in the presentation!

Janis

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