I am a parent of a child with ADHD. I have a problem with motivating him to do his homework. He will sit and do nothing for 2 hours. It is so frustrating!!! He says “I’m hungry, I have to go to the bathroom, my mosquito bites itch, I have a headache, I am tired, etc”. This goes on from 6 pm - 8 pm.
homework issues
We had the same issue and I found it worked when I sat on the sofa next to the place where he was working. I did not look over his shoulder, I read the paper, paid bills etc. My son needed to be grounded by the presence of another person and doing homework can be a lonely thing especially when the rest of the family is relaxing or off doing dishes.
It was time consuming but with me sitting near to him, commiserating, my son could get through it. And it was worth my time to do it that as the homework did get none and no yelling from either of us.
It’s also true that some kids just don’t know where to begin. I did help in the beginning with the organization. What do we have? Math, LA, Science? Let’s figure out an order. My son liked to do the easiest first and for him that worked - it got him on a roll. Other kids like to do the hardest first.
The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step but that first single step when it comes to homework can feel overwhelming. It can help to help him pile his books neatly on a table and to establish how he’ll begin the attack so he can see his way though the many assignments kids these days usually have.
Good luck.
One thing I have learned, and often have to remind myself of, when my dd cannot get started with something that she probably should be able to, it’s a red flag. There is something that needs to be addresses, but first we have to figure out what that is. With homework, there have been many reasons, some that come to mind: *she doesn’t have a clue how to do the work. *She know’s what she is supposed to do, but can’t get it organized in her mind to get started. *There are too many options or steps for her to start, she can’t make a decision on what to do the report on let alone decide where she needs to find the infomation, and how much information to get, and do I need pictures, and should I make a poster, etc. *She is simply overwhelmed with the number of problems or questions she needs to answer. *Her mind is on overdrive, even for her, and she can’t even begin to focus on one thing, unless it means a mindless activity where her mind can race and it doesn’t matter. *She needs a break.
I’d be willing to bet that the headache, misquito bites, tiredness, etc, are nothing more than diversions to avoid the real problem. My only suggestion would be that you sit down with your son and watch him start his homework, what do you see? If he seems to be struggling, just ask questions. Play detective, does he know what type of problem it is? Does he understand the general idea of how to do the calculation? Did the teacher explain this today? Before you even start homework, address the common diversion tactics, get the anti-itch lotion ready and applied to any bites, have him use the bathroom, have a glass of water available, suggest a nap about an hour or so before homework time if needed. Set a timer and plan to stop every 10, 15 or 20 minutes for a 2 or 3 minute break, make sure he knows this will happen.
None or all of this may help, but one thing I can say for sure, you will never motivate him to do his homework, that is going to have to come from him. All you can do is to find what does help to motivate him. It could be little things or bigs things, it could be something he can hold or something that comes from within. But if it’s going to be consistent, it’s got to be his own motivation. Hope that made sense. Good luck.