Sad but true story...

What a good question. Are there other parents like yourself out there who would be willing to come in and help out - regularly? A large number of students means there are also a large number of parents.

If there are, you could essentially have an assistant of parents in each classroom or those where it’s needed most. Even one more person is a great help. Particularly if that one extra person devotes their time to being with a few of the ‘dreamers’. An adult’s presence among the dreamers can help to ‘ground’ them - pointing out where the class is on the page, smiling at the important points, whispering encouragement to them, offering an answer to a teacher’s posed question so they can put their hand up and volunteer to answer with everyone else.

I don’t think this teacher was mean either but I do think holding such a young child in from recess is ineffective. It punishes rather than teaches.

This teacher and her students are very fortunate to have you in there!

Alas, dear Sara. Parents in the classroom?! What a novel idea but one which will never be here, I am afraid. The presence of students’ parents is generally looked upon as potential interference and is not welcomed - actually not permitted I am told, except for special “by invitation” circumstances. ( I am not a parent to any of the students in the aforementioned class). I have heard that there were “problems” when parents volunteered to supplement teacher’s aide time in the past. Obviously there are some people who do not know the meaning of the word “confidentiality” and this was the issue. I would like for the school to rethink their stand on this matter as I feel strongly that many of the lower school teachers (not to mention students) could use additional support. However, I doubt that I will be successful. Frankly, with the tuition currently being charged, I think that fulltime qaulified classroom aide’s could be provided. I am referring to individuals who actually help the children - not necessarily the teacher. Our current aides do a lot of “go-fering” and xeroxing. Now I just need the proper approach. A parent coalition would be stopped dead in the water. It has to be something with a little more finesse.

Some schools have a “parent center” where parents can gather and do tasks that free up the teachers and aides to work directly with the children. If a teacher needs 100 copies of a worksheet, or 22 sets of puppet patterns she simply writes down what she needs done and the volunteer parents do it. They can chat, have coffee, discuss their children, and bring their infants. Volunteers who work in the classroom must sign confidentiality statements— of course nothing is going to eliminate gossiping completely. I am desperately seeking space in our school to set up such a center— many of our parents do not speak much English and are uncomfortable working in the classrooms, but it sure would help them feel connected to the school if they could gather in a parent room and meet other parents who share the same concerns— and buy a fairly nutritious lunch for less than $2.

I do like your ideas. I see many ways they could be implemented. The confidentiality statement would “put their feet to the fire”, when it came to limiting gossip about particular individuals and administration might just go for it. A lot of our volunteerism revolves around fund raising but everyone who might like to volunteer is not necessarily good at or interested in that aspect.

Currently, some of our aides are not qualified to do more than supervise craft projects but that changes from year to year. Like so many hings, good aides are often hard to find.

Thanks for your suggestions.

WOW MATS! I couldn’t have handled that situation as well as you did! I think the biggest problem in schools today is that the new theologies on LD’s is not something that these teachers have studied. Does this school have a policy on spending time “outside of classtime” learning about new policies? Our school district has videos and other resource material that teachers are expected to learn during “in-service” days. The best one for teachers that I have seen is the Richard Lavoi tapes. I think the first one is called, “when the chips are down”. I checked it out for my son’s teacher from the library and she was expected to watch it as part of the 504 plan. It is really a great video and so are the other two. Maybe that would be a good start.

In response to your dilema, it seems to me like the classroom teacher has not had any training in teaching/supporting students with special needs. Unfortunately she is in a situation where she could really use some training or background. It may be helpful for her to try and look into any workshops that are offered in her area, or for her to go on-line and do a little research to find out about ADHD and LD. Knowledge can really be empowering, and it can help her to understand where her students are coming from. She may not be so easily angered by her students’ inability to pay attention or to answer questions that may not have fully been processed because she will realize that these are all things that are related to the students’ disabilities. As you know, there are many support groups and message boards out there, and maybe it would be a good idea for this teacher to become aware of these possibilities as a way to become more informed and to recieve support and adivce from professionals who do have the knowledge, background, and experience helping these students find success in school. If she continues to punish her students for things that are out of their control, this could end up being a bad situation for all involved! It seems like you have a good relationship with this teacher and maybe could pass along some more information to her!
Hope this helps…

You’re a volunteer. Are there others like yourself who are not parents that would volunteer? If not or if there are sufficient funds to hire aides, hire aides.

Are you friendly enough with any teachers to ask why the aides only ‘go-fer and /or if the teachers would like any assistance. I teach at a private school and the faculty is able to ask for things that sometimes they actually get. Your faculty might ask for the redirection of the existing aides or the hiring of new ones.

As a private school, regardless of state, there is little chance that help will come from any other source than within.

Good luck.

Maybe a month ago there was a wonderful segment on 60 mins. about schools on military bases. They actually want parents to participate at school. The kids aren’t separated by learning abilities and the parents contribute alot to classes. There overall testing scores are also very high.

I know my son’s school does not make parents feel welcome at all unless it is parents day. You do not have to have a teaching degree to lend support to kids.

I say if teachers are feeling threatened by parents than they need to do some sole searching to see if they are really doing their best for the kids.

My kids are in DODDS schools in Germany, I spend every Friday in my 5th grader’s class helping the teacher, as well as helping with writing projects in the 1st semester. I chaperone for field trips. I am welcome in any classroom, I have teachers email addresses and always get quick replies. the schools beg for volunteers, you see lots of ‘green suiters’ in the classrooms, dads as well as moms. I personally am dreading coming back to public schools after next year. We are spoiled!