Punishment for memory deficits/forgetfulness

Instead of punishment, what about working on ways to help the child remember? Check in at the end of the day, check lists, etc. This will build a more positive relationship with the child and give them ways to learn organization and memory skills.

In the beginning, that was tried, but it gets to be too much for the teacher.

Sorry, but under IDEA and ADA the teacher is required to accommodate the child’s disability. It is the teacher’s job to TEACH, which means that if a child has a deficit in an area the teacher needs to TEACH the skill directly and accommodate as needed. I’m sorry the teacher feels it is too much to do his/her job. You can request that a parapro be brought in to assist the teacher with this small task.

I just got an email from the teacher and she said that she puts her homework in her backpack for her and then my daughter took it back out and put it back in her desk.
My problem is she punishes her because she loses her homework or forgets to bring it home. She can’t help it. Her memory is that bad. How can punishment help her if she can’t help it? I feel it’s hurting her by punishing her for something she can’t control.

It sounds like it is time for an IEP meeting to brainstorm some solutions. If your dd is deliberately taking her homework out of the backpack and putting it back in her desk, there is more going on than simple memory issues.

Though it might be jumping to a conclusion too quickly, to see ‘taking her homework out, and leaving it on her desk’, as being defiant?
Where it could simply be, that she looked in her bag, and took out what she didn’t recall that she needed to take home?
What is more important, is to recognise that the common ways of ‘organisational thinking’, dont work for her. That she needs to be helped with developing her own strategies.
Geoff,

I didn’t mean to imply that she was being defiant, just that there may be more going on than just memory issues. Its important to figure out the “why” behind behaviors so that approriate actions can be taken.

As someone who can completly understand what this girl is going through, I have to say punishment is the LAST thing needed. I was just like that in 4th grade (and am still struggling now.) You need to encourage and help her. If you punish her thinking she is being defiant or not doing her work that will only discourage her from not being defiant or not doing her work.

When I was younger teachers rarely believed that I did my work because it would (and still often does) get lost in the invisible abyss between the table and my bag or the bag and the teacher’s hand. I frequently did my homework numerous times and when teachers thought I was lazy it made me want to be lazy. There have been many times I’ve really been tempted to not do my homework because chances are I’ll forget it anyway and people already think I don’t do it.

Unfortunatly I can’t suggest many strategies but you need to work with the teacher and if this teacher doesn’t understand and keeps punishing her for this switch classes or schools if necessary.

My guess would be that she tests well and seems to understand most of the material but has trouble with organization. One thing that many teachers like to try is having a sheet sent home with the homework for the parents to sign. DON”T DO THIS… if you have someone who has trouble keeping up with one or two papers, don’t give them any more.

Good luck. Don’t punish her with the conventional methods at least.
sara

If there’s an IEP or 504 in place, then by all means request a meeting to brainstorm strategies.

How does the teacher punish? I honestly do not agree with punishments, but I know many schools are going to totally point-based grading systems (with massive points deducted for homework not turned in, no excuses).

Here’s one strategy you can implement yourself that can be helpful. Get a 2-inch-wide 3-ring binder and a set of “Double Pocket Insertable Plastic Dividers” to go inside the binder. WalMart has these dividers for about $2.89. The plastic makes them virtually indestructible, and they are oversized so loose papers fit into them easily. Label the pockets for your daughter, and add some looseleaf paper in each section (not too much). It helps to have a good 3-hole punch and stapler at home too.

Your daughter should always have this binder with her. Teach her (and have the teacher help train her) to put all homework assignments and all loose papers handed out in class into this binder — preferably in the front pocket of the appropriate divider, although that is not as important as just getting everything into the binder. The binder always goes into the backpack to come home.

At home, you go through the binder and help your dd sort out the papers. Handouts that should be saved can be 3-hole punched and inserted in the appropriate area. Homework assignments, when finished, go into the inside pocket of the appropriate divider. You make sure that completed homework assignments are in the binder, and that the 3-ring binder goes into the backpack for school the next day.

Nancy

Another thing that might be helpful is an accordian folder.
She doesn’t need to organize it, just put everything in it so you know where to look.
It helps me.