My 9 yr son was diagnosed last week with ADHD-I. He is in the 4th grade and not having academic problems as of yet. We had a feeling something wasn’t right but now that it’s confirmed I have been feeling so different. I want nothing but the best for him and he is extremely bright but not gifted. He is not a behavioral child either. He just can’t focus or concentrate. We have chose not to inform the school or use medications for many reasons. Instead we are going the route of helping him by setting a strict schedule,sports,playdates etc….Anyone else out there going through the same? It would be nice to find someone to chat with.
Newly diagnosed with ADHD-I
Thank you from the bottom of my heart. As a child who was forcibly medicated for a disorder diagnosable only based on behavior analysis as having the type of disorder that doesn’t show the symptoms but is still the disorder alledgedly…. Thank you for being one of those that doesn’t medicate first and ask questions later. You will inevitably make mistakes as a parent. All parents mess up now and then and the vast vast vast majority are extremely well intentioned, but you are one of the special parents. You are one of the kind that goes the extra mile and does the extra work to find a route around an issue and to teach your child by making the time available to him to live his life even after childhood in a way that makes it possible for him to have a good life. A parent like you, is a gift every child could use.
Have you ever read the book Talking Back To Ritalin? I forget the author’s name at the moment, but he is pretty cool. You might want to look up the book and his name and pop him an email on the subject of ADHD. i think it is Dr. Breggin or something… There is also a Dr. Boughman, who has some interesting information out there on the subject of ADHD.
I have spent alot of time reading about it myself over the last couple of years. What i have found, is rather shocking and terrifying. Obviously, if your kid can’t focus or concentrate, something isn’t entirely right…. Or normal, but that doesn’t mean that medication is necesarily necesary. It also doesn’t mean there is something wrong with the kid’s brain as they have NOT conclusively shown or proven that there is any difference between the brains of those WITH ADHD and those without it. Just ask NIMH. I find it terrifying how much medication our society spoon feeds it’s children drugs that have been proven to affect the normal brain and the ADHD brain the SAME way. It is even more terrifying to know that effect is an enhanced version of exactly what cocaine does to the brain.
As an adult, I have been reclaiming my life lately after i found something that helped me. But, i am a grown up and i was on every drug under the sun in my teens…. Against my will and nnone helped. What is most sickitating to me though, Is that, the drug i am now on was around back then. But rather than give me (knowing it would help me and having in their hands a file from one of the leading neurologists in the world saying certain drugs would do more harm than good for me,) They then perscribed those drugs written up in that file anyway. They did it without telling me or my parents till months later till i had been through physical and psychological hell several times over, it was all for some weird drug study they werent required to even legally tell us about. I wrote off the whole profession for 10 years. Then i went through a major major depression…. And i realized it wasn’t just depression…. There was something going on…. And i found my current doctor. Took 90 minutes and he changed my life. He offered to go to court and testify that every other shrink i had ever seen post age 12, had comitted malicious malpractice after becoming excruciatingly angry when he read through my file and got to know me. He actually started swearing…. I cried i was soooo happy someone finally knew what was up and wasn’t going to abuse my trust. I was still skeptical but i tried the drugs 1 time and it changed my life. However, an adult brain is fully developed, a child’s brain is NOT. The effects of these drugs on a developing brain is NOT something i would ever flirt with, if i were a parent knowing how horrible my life was in my teens on all the weird drugs they often physically forced down my throat. (well my parents did that on the Dr.’s orders.
But there are many other methods to deal with ADHD, whatever it might be. And i just wanted to tell you how harmful and how helpful drugs can be as well as to help to re-assure you that ADHD or no ADHD, your son is fine, especially in all the ways that matter. And to re-assure you as a person who has been down your son’s road myself, that i think you are doing the best thing that you can. If later he wants to explore drugs, he will, and you should support him in that. But until he decides to do it *as an adult* Unless he is a danger to himself or others i kinda think medicating kids is a piss poor idea especially after my experiences.
Best of luck! Wish i had had parents like you!
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